This immortal is still youthful and kicking yo!
by AK-103
Summary: In this post-Freudian age the institution of marriage, as a by-product of religiously-fuelled monogamy, has deteriorated to the point that amorphous sexual identity, as opposed to rigid religiosity, has become the primary self-defining feature of the individual. (Psst, summary's a joke, just get inside to get the good stuff.)
1. Chapter 1

**Read the A/N at the bottom of the chapter.**

* * *

The feeling of warm bed sheets rubbing against a sweaty skin after a passionate night of 'happy fun time' makes for a pleasantly uncomfortable feeling. Yes, never-mind the contradiction, but to those of you who've gotten laid at some point of your life, the day after the deed is as pleasant as doing the deed itself.

Unless alcohol's involved, which fortunately, isn't the case with me here since 'technically', I'm still underaged. Though it still doesn't stop me from drinking from time to time.

Raising my body from the unfamiliar bed, I rub my eyes to get rid of the irritating eye flakes after a good night sleep.

Well, there wasn't much sleeping happening… buuuut you guys know what I mean.

Stretching my arms upwards, I exhale excessively through my nostrils. I can still feel the bed tempting me to fall back in and sleep the day away, but sadly, this man is immune to simple acts of temptation. Slowly and carefully getting off the bed, at least careful enough to not wake up sleeping beauty over here, I walk around the room to gather the scattered article of clothing laying around.

They're mostly my uniform; the shirt, tie, blazer… pants… but I pick up hers too. She had a rough night yesterday, wouldn't want to make her wake up to the sight of an even messier bedroom. Putting on my uniform half heartedly, I exit the bedroom and into the main commons area of this luxury condominium.

Looking around, I'm impressed. This place can easily house three or four people with how large it is. The place has everything that a single, uncommitted office lady would ever need. The kitchen's large and stocked with more than enough appliances, the same can't be said for the contents of her fridge, sadly, and the bathroom's equipped with both a shower and tub. The toilet has a heater too, amazing. This place, obviously, is high class; not something a normal high school student like me can afford.

Aha, but there's where you're wrong.

"Naruto-kun, dear, are you outside~?"

Dropping the appropriate amount of sugar cubes into the coffee I've made while my inner monologue's playing, I hold both mugs in my hand.

"I'm making coffee, come outside if you want it."

I can hear her whining about still wanting to stay in bed, but I know that's not an option.

She has a board's meeting at ten and the clock's just two hours short.

Setting down the two mugs on the tempered glass dining table, I bring one up to my face and inhaled the freshly brewed aroma of morning coffee through my nostrils.

Smiling, I take gulp of the warm morning beverage.

' _Ah… nothing says good morning than free coffee after a job well done.'_

Looking outside the glass sliding door that leads to the veranda of this impressive condo, the sound of soft footsteps approaching here is almost unheard of due to the carpeted floor.

"Good morning dear." She whispers into my ear.

I feel her arms wrap around my neck, her nose tickling the back of my ears as my own nose is pleasantly assaulted by the musky scent of lavender oil and vanilla imbued to her skin. It makes for a pleasant sensation, something I enjoy myself.

Chuckling, I allow her to indulge in this moment of playfulness. I sit here, playing along as her hand roams underneath my uniform through the rather large opening that my lazily buttoned shirt provides, her delicate fingers tracing along my collarbone and such. I reach my own hand out to caress her cheek, allowing her to have an easier to my face.

Instantly, my face is assaulted by quick, strawberry flavored, kisses.

Eyelids, eyebrows, forehead, nose, chin… if her lipstick isn't already gone, I'd have a hard time washing my face.

After a minute of our playful session, she finally settles down to enjoy the mug I've prepared for her.

"Hey."

Arching an eyebrow, I responded, "Hm? What is it?"

"...won't you stay with me?"

And just like that, the coffee that I've been drinking tastes twice bitter than what it should be.

"You know that's not an option."

"But I need you. I've been feeling much, much better ever since I met you."

When it comes to this line of work, you need to know when to say yes and no.

Thankfully, I've been doing this long enough to know when to say both.

"I'm sorry." I say, letting go of my mug. "But you know I can't."

Most of the compensated dating done in Japan is done by women. A sizeable portion of the population happens to be high school students and ninety percent of female high schoolers engaging in such activities did so out of their own consent, while admitting in finding discomfort for having to trade sexual favors for money.

So what about the men, where do they stand in all of this?

Simple.

"It goes against the agency's policy. If they ever find out, we're both dead." I say to her in the calmest voice I can muster. Huh, if I remember correctly, this isn't the first time I've had this conversation.

While the presence of men in the business isn't as prominent as the girls', we make up a niche section of the market. You won't see young lads meeting up with women in some shady, neon lit alleyway in downtown Ginza - at least not anymore nowadays.

"You can just quit. Then you can move in with me," she sounds giddy, anxious. "I-I'll provide for you!"

...as expected.

I'm not sure how anyone will take it, but this isn't the first time a client has said something like this to me. And she won't be the last either.

I shake my head.

"I'm sorry."

The face she makes rid her of her adult status. She looks like a young high school freshman who's been rejected by her very first crush, even after preparing her feelings for a very long time. The waterworks come to play and that is where I start feeling uncomfortable.

If there's one thing that stuck with me for a very long time, is that I can't stand the sight of women crying.

I just can't, for some reason.

Especially when it involves… emotions like this one.

Her choked sobs dig their way into my soul, carving through my defenses through the means of guilt. Closing my eyes, I let out a sigh.

I take back what I said, I still don't know what I'm doing.

"Look, don't cry." I reach forward, leaning towards her with my hand placed on her shoulder. Making circular rubbing motions with my time, I attempt to soothe her. "You can always call me anytime, even outside of work. I'll try to find time for you."

I feel sick saying this, honestly.

I don't like lying. But I've been finding it extremely difficult to do otherwise lately.

Calming down, she finishes her drink. We spend a few minutes chatting for a while, before cleaning the bedroom and doing the dishes from last night's late dinner. I make quick work of using the washroom, doing the necessary grooming and morning.

All that work done has eaten the time on the clock leaving us with only an hour left to work with.

Fortunately for me, I'm just about done.

"You're staying at home today?" I ask her once I return back to the living room. She's lounging around on the sofa, now wearing something more decent than a pair of brassier and panties… as decent as a loose fitting t-shirt can get, at least.

"Hmm." is her lackluster response. I kind of expect that. Maybe I should give her some time.

Yeah, that will be ideal.

"Alright then."

"You going to school now?"

"Yup." I reply, already at the door getting ready to put on my shoes. "There's an exam today and I intend to ace it."

She walks over from the living area to the doorway. Just as I am about to open the door, she pulls me by the collar, turns my body and pins my back on the door.

I can't say I am surprised but I am not expecting this level of heat from her either. Whatever effort I've made on making my uniform look neat and presentable is thrown out of the window. Her aggressive pulling, scratching and rubbing are more than necessary to undo the first couple of buttons of my shirt as well as the tie that is meant to keep it together in the first place.

My face isn't exactly safe from her assault either. In fact, it's practically ground zero for her kiss.

I don't know how she manages to apply lipstick again, or why even bother doing so in the first place, but my face's now riddled with their marks. I frown, but I don't exactly struggle.

Technically, this is still a part of my job. This kind of job is only over when you exit your client's house.

I wince when she bites down hard on my right ear lobe.

Ow.

"Was that really necessary?" I send her a disapproving look.

"Yes." Oh now you're smiling. I swear, I'll never understand girls.

After one last kiss, something she insists on doing, I finally set my foot out the door looking like a bigger mess than when I was inside. Dropping my bag down momentarily on the mat, I hastily attempt to fix the mess done by my client.

Ugh, I have to sew on some buttons when I get back from school, great.

Pulling out a napkin, I rid myself of whatever lip mark I can on my face. Irritation builds up in me as I realize that I only manage to get some smudges out of my face. Seriously, beauty products? How? Why are you so hard to clean?

"Well, let's look at the time…"

Crap, I'm late.

Sighing, I pocket my phone back and bend down to pick my bag up. This place isn't too far from school, but it'll be wishful thinking to get there without being late.

"Oooh… Hiratsuka-sensei's gonna kill me."

* * *

"I'm so gonna kill you, Uzumaki."

See, I told you.

I have gotten used to people staring at me, but I have to admit, an angry Hiratsuka-sensei is not something I want to get used to.

My classmates are staring at me, but I mostly ignore them. Instead, most of my attention is focused on Mt Hiratsuka who looks like she's about to erupt at any second here in this classroom. Please don't do that, think of all the children here.

Somehow, through some alien women mind magic, she is able to tell that I am talking smack about her. This is shown when her glare gets even more intimidating, and her intention of wanting to deck me straight on my face is even more evident.

"Not publicly, I hope?" I ask in an inevitable attempt of struggle against my unfortunate fate.

However, it seems Lady Luck has me in her good graces today.

"Sit down. And see me after class, you'll be spending recess with me in the faculty room." She gives me one last glare before sending me off to my seat.

Wordlessly, I shrug my shoulders before hefting my bag and then making my way to my seat.

On the way there, my classmates' less than subtle staring continues to follow me until I reach my seat. I have to endure it until I finally get to sit myself down on the chair. Hiratsuka-sensei looks at me one last time, before proceeding with homeroom.

Homeroom, as expected and usual, is the epitome of high school monotony. Every darn day, the homeroom teacher will have to stand in front as start the school day up for us students. The only times when things may deviate from its routine tangent is when and if there's an announcement from the faculty.

Unfortunately, there's no such things today.

I feel buzzing in my pockets. Discreetly, I reach in to pick up the source of the disturbance. Thank god I had it on silent mode before coming into class…

 **From:Yui-Yuig hama**

 **To: U.N_Owen_was_him? (1)**

 **Subject: None**

 **Ur laaaaate! Wut happened?**

...this girl… I can't believe her…

"Eeep!"

When I finally meet face to face with the person I'm having my 'secret' conversation with, she goes all red and buries her face into her desk. If she's that afraid of being spotted, then she shouldn't have texted me in the first place.

Allowing myself a low chuckle, I text her back anyway.

 **From: U.N_Owen_was_him?**

 **To: Yui-Yuig hama**

 **Subject: None**

 **Tired. Overslept. Talk l8tr.**

Pressing the digital 'send' button, her response to my message is almost instantaneous. But rather than texting me back, she responds by making a secretive 'thumbs up' gesture from her seat.

I chuckle.

How cute.

Glancing upwards, I see the clock. Ugh, it'll be some time until homeroom's over. Not to mention, I still have to meet sensei in the faculty office, meaning I'll have my recess cut short if I'll be allowed to have any at all. Letting out a defeated sigh, it seems like today's going to be a long day.

Yeah, it is…

I'm not who everyone think I am.

The school - my classmates, the faculty and everyone in Soubu in general - believes that I'm a womanizing jerk who's also a part time delinquent when I'm not making an enemy out of all girls I meet.

Of course, that's entirely not true.

First of all, I don't 'womanize' women. Every client I've met and entertained were single… at least that's what they said. I don't beat up people for fun, but I do find it fun to beat people _who beat up people for fun._ But you know what? Let them think what they want, it's not like I'm a stranger to being labeled demeaningly.

Not then, not now, not ever.

Anyway, as far as people are concerned, I'm just those things and an ordinary high school boy who's living his life in the peak of his youth and adolescent.

However!

What they do not know is that…

...I'm a ninja.

Or was. Yeah. I was a ninja. Shinobi. Sadly, I'm far from being a Ninja Hattori who goes all 'nin-nin~' everytime he talks to someone. I've my own gimmick and I intend to stick with that, dattebayo. Again, the legit one. Water walking, wall walking, transforming and assassinating… you name it, I've done them all.

I'm also an immortal.

Hehe… hehe… funny story, that one.

* * *

"Do you know why I've called you here?"

Raising my head, I give my questioner an honest to god look of pure nonchalance.

"I was late to homeroom." I say, almost confidently. "What else?"

"That's only half the reason." says my homeroom teacher who has her back rested on her swivel chair. "The other reason... is this."

For whatever dramatic reason and purpose I don't know of, she stretches her sentence while pulling out a sheet of paper with a very familiar handwriting written all over it.

Now that I have a clearer view of said paper, it kind of looks familiar.

Oh, what do you know, it's my handwriting written all over that paper. With my name written on it. With-okay, you get what I mean.

"This." She's pointing at the paper as if it's an amateur Soundcloud rapper's mixtape. The poor paper. "Can you explain to me what this _thing_ is."

Looking at it, I read the few first words written, "Personal reflection of a high school student's daily life." I say. "What about it?"

"I'm serious, Uzumaki."

"..." Her eyes don't lie. Looks like I'll have to be serious too. Crossing my arms, I lean back. "I'll rewrite the thing if I have to, sensei. But don't expect me to change a word in that paper."

It might seem like a fool's errand to challenge your lecturer. But, you see, in this case, I don't have to worry about anything… aside from the physical violence that may come with pissing Hiratsuka-sensei off.

...damn shame, she's pretty too, must be the reason why she's still single.

"...why do I feel like punching you, Uzumaki?"

Oh, right, I forgot; the alien women mind magic, right.

After her glare lessen in intensity, she opens her mouth to speak. "And why shouldn't I expect you to rewrite this piece of crap, hm?" From the way she says those words, it's as if she's challenging me.

Alright, sensei, I'm game.

"Well, sensei, it's because due to the nature of the essay itself, I am required to be as subjective as possible since the ouvre's main topic is about personal reflection."

She stares at me after hearing my short explanation. After a while, she lets out a sigh.

"You're a lazy bum, but you are one of my smartest students."

I smile. "Well thank yo-"

"It's not a praise."

Well, damn.

Waving the piece of paper in front of me, she speaks, "In any case, I'm still going to look forward for that rewrite. If I can't make you do it the proper way, then I'm just going to make it as a punishment for today's lateness."

I shrug. Hey, works for me. Besides, I've seen worst case of power abuse.

"Fine by me. So, can I go now?"

In response to my question, she leans back further on her chair's backrest. "Not so fast."

Hm?

She presses the tips of her fingers against each other as if she's some sort of B-rated movie villain. "Come back here after school, I'll give you the next half of your punishment."

I take back everything I said, this woman is a tyrant to the core.

But it's not like I haven't dealt with female tyrants in the past.

' _Isn't that right, Kaguya?'_

…

No reply… so it looks like Kakashi sealed her for good after all. The sealing process was rather cruel and merciless I'll admit, but it's still a little bit too much when she ends up dead.

...it doesn't explain why it made me immortal, though.

Was it because of Kaguya's divine-like status? When they sealed her into me, did it alter my physiology? If so, what happened to Kurama? It's been forever ever since I've heard his voice… I can't even go inside the seal anymore.

Hell…

I can't even use chakra anymore.

"-aruto! Oi, Naruto!"

I am snapped out from my inner thoughts.

My return to reality is greeted by the sight of a concerned Hiratsuka-sensei with worry present on her face. "Are you okay?" Even her voice mirrors her expression.

Blinking my eyes repeated to refresh them, I shrugs. "I'm fine. I wasn't kidding; I'm still sleepy." I'm not just averting her attention away from my absence, I am still sleepy.

Wasn't allowed more than three winks of sleep even if I asked last night.

Hearing my uninspired reply, the worry and concern bleeds off her face, her eyes rolling sideways as she lets out a mocking scoff. "I better not hear complaints from the teachers about you sleeping your ass off in class, Uzumaki. You hear me?"

Gee, you know that's the least of your worries sensei.

With my back already turned towards her and my right foot just outside the door, I raise a hand up with the 'OK' sign next to my head as I exit the room and then closing the door shut.

Even outside, I can hear her sighing.

Oh well, let's get back to class, English is in session.

* * *

I do not have any solid conclusion as to how I'm in this world, but whatever it is, it most likely has something to do with the sealing of Kaguya into me.

It sounded like a last ditch effort, a desperate move on our part… well, it's because it was.

We tried everything. Everything.

But even with the Sage of Six Paths' powers, Kaguya was still too much for us to handle. Our morale were drastically decreasing and despair consumed pretty much all of us. She showed us that she was able to bend reality right before our very eyes, decimating hundreds of our troops without even breaking a sweat.

That was how powerful and scary she was. Kaguya.

The losses on our side were many. Too much, if I have to say. I didn't even have time to properly grief for those who died. So with our numbers few, the rest of us being trapped inside an infinite illusion and hope waning, I proposed the plan.

The plan to stop Kaguya for good.

I remember Sakura-chan slapping me hard on the face, telling me that what I proposed was the dumbest thing that had ever came out of my mouth since forever. But deep down in our hearts, we knew that it was probably the only way to stop Kaguya.

Obito died, but not before leaving Kakashi with one final and familiar gift. Kakashi himself was against the idea. You should've seen the look on his face. I've never seen him looking more regretful than he did back then, and we hadn't even gone with the plan. Sakura was angry, mad; ready to struck me down a second time. Thankfully, it didn't get to that point.

And Sasuke.

Sasuke… he was…

He was still Sasuke.

The darkness in his eyes remained, I could sense it. He hadn't return to us. But he was still a shinobi, and a damn good one at that. You know, a part of me now wished he'd acknowledged me in the end. That I was his friend.

His brother.

But no. He was just as stuck up as the first time I met him. Bastard didn't even say anything.

…

God I miss them.

Everything was made possible mostly due to Sasuke's capability of briefly overwhelming Kaguya with his ridiculous hack of an eye, Kakashi preparing the seal, and Sakura… well, let's just say she was there in spirit. The Seal itself was a very powerful construct, rivalling that of the one implemented on me by my own father when he used it to seal Kurama to infant me.

It was only as powerful as the Reaper's Death Seal because it was an Uzumaki Clan made Fuinjutsu, as anything less couldn't compare. At that point, there weren't anyone else but the four of us to stop Kaguya and this desperate move was the only option we got in order to save our friends and ensure that the Elemental Nation was safe from being subjected to the Infinite Tsukuyomi.

However, this particular Fuinjutsu, is not as unforgiving as the Reaper's Death Seal was to its user as it only screws over the person and, or, thing it's going to be sealed on; namely me and Kaguya.

Huh, is this why dad chose the Reaper's Death Seal over that particular Seal? Because he'd rather be stuck in the eternal pits of the Shinigami's belly rather than cursing me with a mysterious and potentially devastating side effect?

...anyhow,

My Senjutsu was capable of sensing Kaguya as she was prone to open portals, Sasuke stunned her with his arsenal of Uchiha jutsu and Kakashi sealed the deal.

...quite literally, now that I think about it.

What happened next was… blank.

I couldn't remember anything past that.

Next thing I knew… I was already an immortal.

How did I know I was one?

Well, it's because I found myself at the bottom of the ocean. Alive. My lungs were literally being crushed by the pressure of the abyss as I breathlessly and frantically swam my way up to the surface.

And when I did manage to break the surface, I found myself lost and stranded on sea with no way of reaching land. My new immortal life started with me spending a full year of being stranded at sea.

I couldn't use chakra, I could not access my connection to Kurama… I was powerless. I couldn't do anything aside from letting the cruel waves carry me to wherever they wanted me to. That one year period did a lot to mind, I'll admit. I found myself hungry, but no matter how many days passed, I would not die from starvation. Even after the dangerously hazardous amount of sea water I consumed just to quench my occasional thirst, I would still not die from dehydration.

It was crippling to the soul, I'll tell you. I wanted to die, but I couldn't. So I gave up trying to drown myself, as doing so would only cause me discomfort. And the overall feeling of water surrounding my body made my very being numb.

Until one day, I was saved.

Literally.

A passing fishing ship saw me, a blonde kid in his teens, practically naked with torn clothing, floating on the ocean water with his eyes closed. They brought me on board and tried to resuscitate me… the last part wasn't quite necessary. The fishermen were surprised to even hear me breathing, just imagine the face they made when they saw me sitting back up and talking to them.

They began asking me questions in a language that I didn't understand. I was very disoriented at that time and seeing these men and with the unbearable stench of a shipping boat overwhelming not only my olfactory senses, I panicked. It took awhile for me to calm down and even after that, I still couldn't understand their language.

...but long story short, that's how I managed to find myself in 15th Century Europe, just a few decades before Christopher Columbus landed in the Americas from Spain.

And-

"So, I've heard."

...god dammit, woman, I was just getting to the good part! Now how am I gonna info-dump my way out of this chapter, huh?!

"About what?"

She glares at me, crossing her lab coat covered sleeves above her chest. "About you, who else?" She scoffs.

"So, what have you heard about me?" Good things, I hope.

"Bad things." Shit. "I heard you made a girl from year one cry last week."

Ah yes, that thing…

Hm… is she really going to give me shit for this?

"What was I supposed to do?" I ask her, rhetorically, of course. "I wasn't gonna say yes, so a 'no' was what I gave her."

Sensei glances sideways at me, but the look she's giving me is devoid of judgement; just pure curiosity.

"Let me tell you a story, sensei." I begin, speaking. "A boy has a crush on this pretty, smart but brick house of a girl who's in the same class as him."

I pause, letting the first sentence of my story sink into her mind.

"She's nice. A real sweetheart, really, but she also has the meanest right hook known to men." I find myself chuckling as I'm speaking. "One day, the boy decides to confess his so called 'love' to the girl."

Hiratsuka-sensei is walking silently, patiently waiting for me to finish this silly story of mine.

"Unfortunately, for the boy, she rejects him. Why? It's because she, herself, is in 'love' with an even better looking and smarter boy." I say, concluding my short story.

"What, that's it?" She asks me, blinking. Judging by the look, she is extremely unimpressed by my tale.

"Yup." I nonchalantly say in reply.

"What are you trying to say? That you're the girl in the story and that you have someone else you already like?"

I chuckle. "Maybe." Totally not.

Scratching the back of my head, I say again. "But, honestly, I don't just accept love confessions from random people. Especially people I don't know really well. I think that it makes…" Uh… what's the word I'm looking for here,

"I think that it cheapens the feeling of love itself."

Her expression changes to that of confusion to incredulousness. "Cheapen? That's rather cruel to the girl, don't you think?" she then asks me, "what if her feelings were real? What if she genuinely loves you?"

I shrug my shoulders. For a moment, I can't seem to find a reply to her questions.

Genuine. Being genuine means being above superficiality, possessing the claimed attributed character or quality. Real. Authentic. It also means to be free of pretense, sense of affectation and hypocrisy. Sincere.

I wonder… can it still be called genuine if you base that sensation solely from feeling?

I can tell Hiratsuka-sensei what's really on my mind, but it seems that I have developed a rather sadistic streak and I enjoy seeing her confused and clueless about what's going in my head.

So, I decide to reply ala Kakashi.

By being as cryptic as I can.

"Imagine this," I raise a finger, carrying our conversation as we walk towards our destination, "just imagine getting love confessions on the daily. What'll that make you feel?"

She makes a thinking expression as she walks, her stride decreasing to match my pace. "It'll make me feel happy, if I'm in the shoes of a teenage boy like you, that's for sure."

Hearing her answer makes me smile. I expect her to say that.

"If you're happy from that, then, good luck trying to find which one's genuine out of all those love letters."

Sure there are these things called 'love at first sight', hell, that's something even I'm familiar with. But I've realized a long time ago that those things aren't love. Yet, at least.

That spark that occurs when you see your supposed 'soulmate' isn't love just yet, and calling it love without even trying to properly understand that feeling will only be something shortsighted and immature to do.

...then again, these so called 'love at first sight' mostly happens to adolescents like the ones in this school environment.

Our conversation and my own personal musings have brought us to our destination, it seems. Hiratsuka-sensei is the first one to stop when we reach a classroom door. I recognize this area of the school as a place where all the unused classrooms are. Though calling them unused is a tad wrong, since most are used for club purposes.

Oh yeah, she brings me here for a punishment, I wonder what kind awaits.

"...I'm going to have to hold this conversation for later, right now, we're here." She nudges at the door. Then, without even the slightest hint of manners or privacy, she slides the door open, greeting herself as she lets herself in.

"Yo Yukinoshita, we're here!"

I must admit, seeing sensei barging into a room announcing herself is a bit nostalgic. If nostalgia's true to its name, whoever's inside the room will not be pleased with the sudden entry.

"Sensei… how many times do I have to tell you."

I've never heard a voice so cold coming from a teenage girl before, or maybe I have, I don't know, it's been a long time.

But, after getting a good look at the owner's face, my curiosity becomes short lived. Now, I don't indulge myself in rumors or baseless gossips regarding my peers here in school. But with how active and bustling the school's social activity is, you cannot help but listen in on things.

"Please, knock."

Icy cold.

I swear I feel the harsh arctic winds blowing past me the moment those piercing blue eyes land on us. They dance around Hiratsuka-sensei's and my own figure, almost robotically and mechanically switching between the both of us, as her avant garde brain inputs complicated calculations that will determine the possible reasoning as to why the school's most infamous violent and short fused instructor is standing alongside the school's number one casanova in front of her door.

The moment I lay my eyes on her, I instantly know who she is. Her hair, her eyes and even the air that surrounds her; there's no mistaking who she is.

...I say, but honestly, I have never really meet her before.

Uwaah, I can feel her eyes staring right through me, like, she's legit drilling holes through me.

Yukinoshita Yukino. The school's resident Ice Queen. She's one of the most notorious girls in our school, despite her antisocial nature. Sadly, this means almost all of the things people know about her are bad, though some hold true.

Being in class J of this year's second batch, a class that's only populated by the top rankers of our school and a class that's mostly got girls in it, people naturally regard her as smart and genius even; and they're right. But, however, her coldness and I quote 'razor edge tongue' leaves behind a scary impression upon students, even teachers.

As far as looks go, she is beautiful, I'll admit. Young. Slender, petite… _humble_ as far as physique goes. Long black hair that will bring about images of ancient oriental princesses and a pair of blue eyes that will dissect your every being should they ever land themselves upon you.

Basically, what she's doing to me right this very moment.

And I can say, judging by those very eyes, she is not impressed at what she's seeing.

"Ahaha, sorry, sorry." Sensei says as she attempts to laugh off her rude entrance from earlier. She walks up to me, standing by my side. "So, this guy over here-" she then rudely nudges my left bicep, "-is looking on joining this club."

I raise two fingers.

"First of all, that's a load of bull." I pause, clearing my throat. "Second, what kind of club is this? The ghost club? Is that what we're gonna do? Solving Scooby Doo mysteries?"

Hiratsuka-sensei is going to hit me, I'm sure, but whatever it is she plans on doing to me is interrupted by the original resident of this… barren classroom.

I mean, seriously, all the tables and chairs are all set aside; purposefully leaving behind this clearing in the middle of the room with a single open table and chair for the girl to occupy. If there are anymore people here, I wouldn't have find it so strange.

"Surly manners, as expected." I can feel the chill in her voice as she seizes me up in a tundra-like glare. "I'd expect such uncivilized response from a caveman who's only sentient enough to remember children's cartoons, and it seems that idea rings true."

...not bad. I'll give it a… seven point five out of ten.

Crossing my arms, I allow the corners of my lips to stretch a little bit. "Forgive this caveman." I mock plea. "As you've said, he's only sentient enough to remember children's cartoons. The same can't be said for complicated, angst-driven and depressed Greek tragedy of an atmosphere you got going along over here, miss."

The effects are instantaneous. The look of pure DEATH that she's been giving me intensifies and for the first time ever, I get to see Yukinoshita Yukino glaring at me actively as if she's trying to scare away a stray dog.

I'm about to introduce myself to her as per decorum, but sensei just has to be a party pooper and intervene.

"Alright, alright; let me do the speaking for now okay Uzumaki?"

Meh, suit yourself.

Trying again, sensei speaks. "Yukinoshita, this is Uzumaki Naruto. I'm sure you know who he is."

But the ice girl doesn't respond. She still has her eyes fixed on me like an Olympic archer on a bullseye. I swear, if she's staring any harder, she'll see right through me; clothes, skin, organs and all.

"Yes." It's a little subdued, but she manages to reply in the end. "Yes, I know of him…" Her glare lingers, before leaving me. "Unfortunately."

Heh, cute. Three out of ten.

"Ahem. As you can see, this guy over here, is in need of a little attitude adjustment." the lab coat wearing woman standing beside me says

Oi, this is not what we agreed on! "Wait, wait, you told me that I'm here because-"

"-he's been very disruptive in class and his overall behavior is just plain terrible!"

…what? What?! I literally can't even - I can't odd either - just what the hell is this woman spouting on about? _About me no less?!_

I am denied speech when Yukinoshita beats me to the mark.

"I expected no less from such an uncivilized person, as I've said before." The look on the ice queen face turns from pure disdain to disappointment.

Like, just imagine the look that people who are trying to make their eggs sunny side up make when they pop the yolk.

"Okay, look-"

"He also has the gall to be tardy during lessons too."

"Unruly, uncivilized and a severe lack of discipline? I'm surprised we even allow him here."

"Hey, see-"

"And his school work, _brr,_ you should read some of it. On second thought, don't, you'll end up regretting it."

Alright, that's it. I'm not about to let these two ladies have all the fun by making fun of me.

" **Sensei."**

That get both of their undivided attention on me.

You see, I've met many kinds of people in my life. Both in my old shinobi life and my life now as an ordinary immortal with no chakra. Unfortunately, but unsurprisingly, almost ninety-nine percent of those people I met are jerks. Like, _jerk_ jerks. And despite how it might look like with the way I handle my previous nemesis, I've been running low on patience ever since… ever.

And with these, jerks, you see, come problems. And with problems come a solution to stop these problems from happening continuously.

I am a warrior at heart. A fighter, a killer. Hell, I was a fucking ninja for god's sake. So, naturally, violence is one of the things on top of my list on how to deal with unlikable people. But of course, I'm not going to go all Zabuza on these two girls for two specific reasons. One is that I can't and two, getting violent over things like this is just plain stupid.

But being scary and menacing?

Nothing wrong about that… right?

"You're pissing me off, sensei."

Sensei's playful look is washed off her face by a wave of fear. She averts her gaze away from mine, before recomposing herself. "R-Right, ahem, sorry."

I smile. "None taken." Then I direct my focus towards the original resident of this desolate room, who flinches the moment my face turns towards her. "Uzumaki Naruto from class 2-F. Although I really don't want to be here, I think I'll play along."

The smile I've directed towards her does little to change her expression. She falls into a state of silence, pensively staring at me with those beautiful eyes of hers.

"I still have my doubts about this, I'm afraid." She says straight to my face, blowing cold wind of spite. "Your reputation precedes you, and I fear for my chastity." She makes the gesture of a vulnerable woman, covering herself with both arms as far as they allow her.

This brat…

"Maa, Yukinoshita," sensei interjects, it seems like she knows my patience is running thin already. "Despite what you might have heard about Uzumaki, he's a law abiding citizen." As far as common laws, that is. "And you don't have to worry about him doing any of those things to you."

I pitch in. "She's right." I turn to look at the original resident of this empty, classroom. "I like my girls a little less cold and with an actual, warm, and beating heart thank you very much."

"Oi, you're not helping your case here."

"That's the point." That's the point, sensei. That's the fucking point.

Sensei's face shows frustration and annoyance, but that's to be expected. "In any case, Yukinoshita, he'll be a member of your club starting from today." So soon? "And the two of you will have to learn to work together from now on."

Work together? That implies the presence of an objective, a goal. I don't know this place is a clubroom at first glance, but it seems this is a legit club if Hiratsuka-sensei herself refers to it as such. No use in making fun of it now, I suppose. But, still though, what kind of club is this?

Miss Yukinoshita's face still shows uncertainty and distrust, looks like she really is wary about me. I have to admit, it hurts a little bit. I don't think I look that scary, do I?

But it seems I'll have to give credit where it's due. She gives the expression of someone who has conceded to an absolute decision made by their superior at work; she looks resigned, in other words.

"Very well." Yukinoshita sighs out, flicking away a waterfall of her gleaming black hair from her face. "But I will not hesitate to defend myself should he succumb to his primitive urges."

Still going on with this caveman thing, huh?

"Understandable." It's worrying to me how quickly and easily sensei agrees with Yukinoshita's condition. She also gives her an approving look. Ooh, scary, scary.

Sensei then turns toward me, spreading her arms apart in a 'voila!' motion. "Well there you have it, Uzumaki, you're a part of this merry little club now." She reminds me of Shrek, minus the ugly and being green skinned part. "Hopefully, Yukinoshita over there will be able to fix that poisonous attitude of yours."

"Wait, sensei," Yukinoshita intercepts, "why are you leaving all this work to me?"

Sensei gives her a weird look, one of her eyebrows raised. "Because he's here as a client, duh." She then hums. "Then again, he's also a member now too. Looks like the two of you will have to come up with something together." She makes her way towards the door as she's saying this. "Uzumaki, I hope that you'll be able to get along with Yukinoshita well. And Yukinoshita, don't hesitate to do what you have to do if he ever sinks his claws into you."

And just like that, she exits the room, leaving the both of us here alone together.

The draft that rushes into the room when sensei opens the door quickly dies down, much like how quickly the air is getting unbearable because none of us are willing to strike up a conversation.

This is to be expected, we're practically brought together like this against our own will. Me especially. However, I wonder about her. It seems like she shows no actual signs of protest or opposition barring matters related to her personal security and me being a trash of a human being. Is Hiratsuka-sensei some sort of advisor to this 'club'? If so, then that will explain why she easily vetoed Yukinoshita's decisions.

And that brings up my earlier question. Just what kind of club is this? Yukinoshita's practically the only member before I got roped up into this, and as far as I recall, there's a minimum requirement of four members to start up a club of some sort.

Hmm… I smell that smelly smell, that smelly smell that smells… smelly. **(2)**

I'm sitting here on my chair with nothing but my uniform and the phone in my pocket, while she's there sitting on her own corner with the company of a book.

A good book too, I might add.

"Is that the English version or a local one?"

My question instant draws her attention away from the book to me. Her gaze is fixed entirely on me, showing hints of curiosity herself. Unlike me, I'm not asking for the sake of sating my own curiosity. I want to break the ice.

"A localized Japanese translation from the bookstore downtown." She flips the book to show me the written Kanji covering the book's opened pages. Tilting her head in a manner that reminds of a feline creature, she asks, "why do you ask?"

I chuckle. Her looks basically says 'you don't look like the type of person who's even remotely literate so why bother asking'. I'd be offended, but I'm not. For some reason.

"Just asking." I say to her, my smirk slowly disappearing. "So, why would a perfectly well mannered and well raised young lady such as you read a book like that?"

She frowns. Obviously, she doesn't find the pleasantries… pleasant. But, in the end, she entertains my question anyway. "Why? Is there a problem with my reading material?"

"Oh no." I shrug. "I'm just asking."

Although I can't say for sure, the book she's currently reading isn't a very common choice amongst adolescent Japanese readers around her age. Again, I can't say for sure. Localized English books are getting more common in Japan over the past decade, it certainly does a remarkable job at exposing the Japanese with foreign media; even if local Japanese media still reign supreme. So, I suppose, it is getting fairly easier to get western books in your normal book store.

But, still… the sight of Yukinoshita Yukino reading American Psycho is disturbing to me.

"If you're concerned about the content and the message that this book carries, don't be. In fact, why are you even concerned at all?"

"I told you, I'm not." Sheesh. This chick is so full of herself.

"Really?" Again, the way she asks. It's as if she's prodding me with a piece of iron stake, waiting for me to burst. "I have been warned and heard of your very… delicate methods in sinking your claws into young fair maidens such as myself. Is this not an, albeit poorly done, obvious attempt on doing that?"

…

"...have someone ever told you that you're insufferable?" I ask, all goodness and pleasantries dropping off my voice. "That you're… stuck up?"

She makes a noise I do not expect her to make. Snorting in what seems to be amusement, the black haired girl gives me a small and surprisingly vexing smile.

"You are exactly the forty seventh person to have ever called me that in my life, Uzumaki-kun."

"Whew, good thing I'm not the first one." I roll my eyes. "Wouldn't want to win a prize for that award."

Hearing that, her first reaction is to keep on smiling, as if she has just heard a funny short lived joke that most stand up comedians are only capable of making these days. Turning a page of her book, she tucks a part of her hair behind her ear, while straightening her back on her chair. Her lips straighten back into the thin, stoic and reserved line that people are more familiar with.

Pretty much the rest of our 'club' period goes on like this. She sits there sipping tea and reading her book, while I'm in my own little corner focused with the only thing that's keeping me from going crazy from all the boredom, my phone.

I have a feeling that things are beginning to get… weird from now on.

"Let's play a game shall we, Uzumaki-kun?" With a tilt of her head and her young, smooth, soprano voice… I'm almost attempted to call jailbait, then I remember that I'm supposed to be the same age as her.

And technically… pretty much everyone in existence right now is jailbait to me.

By the way, today's a new day. Meaning this is my second day in this 'yet to be identified' club.

Ditching my internal dilemma, I respond to her suggestion, seeing as there's nothing to do. "Sure. What'll we be playing? Jenga? UNO? Chess?" I wiggle my eyebrows with every games I mention.

"No. We won't be playing anything practical." She dismisses any attempt of humor and lightheartedness coming from me. "Instead, we'll be using our heads for most of the part."

"Sure, lay it on me, Keanu."

She sends me a confused look, but lays it on me, nonetheless.

"It's a guessing game. If you can guess what club this is then… you win."

...what?

I frown, making sure that Yukinoshita is able to see the displeased expression on my face. "That's it? A guessing game?"

"Yes." She says, all smiles. "A guessing game."

A guessing game? Seriously? And here I am expecting real entertainment. You see, I don't mind spending time doing nothing. In fact, I'll say that it's quite an enjoyable thing to do - thanks Shikamaru, looks like your lazy ass stuck with me throughout all the years - but that's beside the point.

"Ara, you look disappointed, Uzumaki-kun."

I click my tongue, rolling my eyes sideways. "Disappointed, sure. But not surprised." I stretch my arms sideways, letting a few of my bones pop. Nothing's wrong with the sight of it, since today's technically T-pose Tuesday. "I wasn't exactly expecting entertainment when Hiratsuka-sensei dragged me here. But what the hell, I'll bite."

So, what exactly is this club I'm part of?

Looking around, this empty room isn't doing a very good job in telling me the type of club it's associated with. An empty room with little to no furnishing at all and one, lonely, girl as its original member. The second thing that comes to my mind was the probability of this club of Yukinoshita being new. I mean, it's not that far fetched, is it? She is the only member until recently, after all.

Doing nothing but reading books and drinking tea, what is this, the SOS Brigade?

Oh God, I hope I'm wrong about that one, I don't want to imagine what will happen if Yukinoshita has a certain brigade leader's enthusiasm. **(3)**

...but I'm not seeing any esper, alien or time travelers around. Phew. **(4)**

There's no music instrument here either, and again, aside from the fact that we're enjoying tea - something she has yet to serve me by the way, rude - I don't see anything that can label this place as your standard Japanese high school club.

So, after thinking about it long and hard - giggity - I give up.

"Meh, no clue."

Yukinoshita sighs in disappointment. "Not even trying. I'm not sure if that's a positive mental attitude we'd like to have in this club, Uzumaki-kun."

She keeps on finding new ways to push my buttons, doesn't she?

"Well, let me enlighten your primitive, cave-dwelling mind then, Uzumaki-kun."

Again with the caveman thing!

Standing up, she takes in air. "This is the Service Club. A club dedicate to, you guessed it, services."

…

…

…

"...what kind of services are we talking about here?" This sounds suspiciously similar to the dating services I've worked for in the past.

She throws a harsh and disapproving glare at me, capable of detecting the underlying euphemism within my question.

"Nothing of that sort mind you, get your mind out of the gutter please Uzumaki-kun." She clears her throat, resuming speaking. "We attend to our clients' request with the promise of helping them should the situation requires it. Think of counseling rather than deranged acts of debauchery, you dirty ape."

Damn, she reminds me of the old Kurama there when he was still an ass to me.

...god I miss him.

"So, basically, we're the real life version of the student council from Medaka Box…" Just not as exciting and violent, and with a much more stuck up and meaner president.

"Who?"

"Nothing." I said quickly, coughing to an open palm. "So, requests, I assume that our clients will be our dearest friends and classmates from the student body?"

She nods in affirmation to my question. "Naturally, but we'll get to that more later. Now, I have a question for you, Uzumaki-kun." Oh ya?

She's doing this club president role pretty well, so far. She reminds me of the way my handler handled my job interview. Distant, yet not disconnected. She made it so that we are both exchanging conversations rather than making things one sided, which means she has a certain grasp of my character or behavior to a certain extent.

"Shoot." I give her the a-okay.

"Do you have any friends?"

...hah?

Is this chick serious? Why on earth is she asking me a borderline offensive question like that to a fuccboi like me?

Of course I have friends!

"Yes." I answer her with the straightest voice I can muster.

"Really?" Oi, what's with that tone, huh? "Ah, I'm talking about people who aren't threatened into becoming friends with you."

"I never threatened anyone." I bristle, my voice rising a few decibels high. Seeing the satisfied look on her face, I realize that I was baited. God damn it, I'll let you have this one, woman. "But, yes, I have friends." I gotta come up with something good… c'mon, think, Naruto!

"What about you, someone as pretty as you surely has or has had friends before, right?"

"Fuh." That damned smile… that damned freaking smile… "That depends." She places a palm on her modest chest, making herself look like some sort of Angelic visage. But I'm no fool. She's a fallen angel, if anything. "First, define how close or distant someone has to be in order to be labeled as-"

"Okay stop right there." I raise my hand, halting the black haired girl from speaking. "See, that right there, is something only someone with no friends would say."

You can certainly quote me on that one.

"You look like the type of girl who'll have her own fan club fawning over you." She's certainly a pleasant person, as far as looks go anyway. "So why isn't that so, pray tell?"

Her smile thins down upon my question. That silent arctic pensiveness returns on her features as she has me fixed on her sight.

Then-

"You see, I have always been a beautiful girl."

Uwaaah… such arrogance and pretentiousness will normally annoy me, but I'm more creeped out and disgusted than anything. She's beautiful, alright, but the words that are coming out of her mouth aren't. Her lips curl into a beatific smile, enchanting honestly.

But no matter how beautiful a rose is, you won't be able to hide the thorns.

"Boys have always liked me, and girls envy me." She proceeds to continue with her soapy moments, "It is precisely because of this that I have no friends."

...I guess I can see where she is coming from? I can see it, but I can never relate to it.

Those born with positive traits, whether it's good intelligence or looks, will always attract a… an _unreasonable_ bunch along the way. I've seen the same drama and scenario play out through various periods of history, sometimes, I even remind myself that this ugly… reaction is exactly what make humans… humans.

Her situation isn't something I'm unfamiliar with, but I can tell that it has done its ways to shape her into the person she is now. Unreasonably good looks, the intelligence to back it up… been there, done that. I'm willing to bet that she has some sort of sibling complex too.

Yukinoshita continues, "if people had genuinely liked me… maybe I would have had people to call friends."

"What do you mean?"

"Ever since I was in elementary, my indoor shoes were hidden sixty times. Fifty of those times were done by girls the same age as me." She hides her hands behind her back, taking on a new pose. "This resulted in me having to bring home my indoor shoes and recorder every time I went home." A sigh is released courtesy of Yukinoshita.

"Pretty tough for a kid." As far as bullying goes, I've seen worse. Experienced worse, too.

"Indeed." Her pensive expression turns sincere, faintly showing signs of visible hurt and regret. "It was truly a tough experience to go through." Then, that smile appears again. "All because I'm beautiful."

"...I demand refund for every bit of sympathy I feel for you up until this point."

Rather than answering me, she ignores my presence altogether, choosing to continue speaking.

"Alas, there's nothing I can do about that. Nobody's perfect. Everyone is weak and unsightly in their own twisted and crooked ways. Things like jealousy and envy easily influence them and others have to suffer as an outlet of their inability to keep their emotions at reign. Weirdly, though, the greater the person, the more they suffer."

I can respect her for saying all of this. She's not afraid to acknowledge that humans, people in general, can be assholes even to those who aren't assholes to them. The old, naive and younger me would surely retort and give her a piece of his mind; but the current me standing right here in front of this girl cannot help but agree with her.

Yet at the same time, he also disagrees with her.

"Isn't that just… wrong?" The normally quiet and reserved girl looks out the window, her eyes lost in the clouds, left to wander. "That's why I'm going to change it all. The world and the people in it."

…

"...heh, that's a big job for a little girl like you."

"Hn. Size nor stature never mattered for those with big ambitions." She retorts, her voice completely calm. "Great men and women, naturally, are driven by even greater ambitions. In return, they will face problems greater than the common person can ever hope to imagine."

This girl…

"That's why-"

Let's test her, shall we?

"You will do that?"

She looks at me, startled by the emptiness of my voice. "Will you? Working hard for change, even knowing that things wouldn't change, struggling, sweating, crying, bleeding… all in the name of change… will you seriously do that?"

She appears… shocked, startled. Her naive eyes blinked at me with the purity of a newborn babe, blindsided by the wall of her own perceived reality.

"Y-Yes, I will." Recomposing yourself has never been so hard, hasn't it, Yukinoshita? I sense hesitation in her voice, but she's careful enough to make herself sound convincing.

"Even if it means doing things that'll make you sick and want to throw up, even if it means compromising the very way of life you're living…"

I need to know if she's willing.

"...and even if it means seeing those close to you hurt or burdened by your ambition… would you still strive for this so called change?"

Now, things are becoming clearer.

Hesitation, doubt and uncertainty begins to surface. I can tell that she has lost all feelings of confidence and determination already. Her face is now a fragile mask of bravado, plagued with the aforementioned things I've mentioned.

As expected, the natural way for her to respond to my pressure is to switch to the defensive.

"It is surely a better goal than to sit idly and sulking as if the world is about to end at any given moment."

Is that an attempt to jab at me or what?

"I hate people who accept their weakness and affirm it."

A flightless bird can only ever dream of flight; looking longingly, envily and dreamily upon the boundless sky that seems to be way out of their reach. Yukinoshita suffers in a dissimilar way, cursed with the gift of flight and turbulence that comes with it.

It might have been easier for her to ignore those turbulences and live on as she is, but she is simply isn't content with that.

Her pride won't allow it.

As someone who has had his shot at making change, I want nothing more than to impart her with whatever little snippets of wisdom I have gathered in the past. Yet at the same time, I do not want her to be discouraged by my failures.

So, to you, I say this:

Girl, the world is a big place. Simply trying won't do you any good. A whole lot of problems are bound to greet you in the future, regardless of big or small. While this dream of yours is a beautiful dream, know that it is a dream you share with people you might have never met before.

I can only hope that you realize this, Yukinoshita.

I really hope.

"...endure."

"What was that, Uzumaki-kun?"

I breathe in.

Breathe out.

"...nothing." I say, stretching my arms sideways, cracking my joints in the process. "Hey, Yukinoshita?"

"Hm?"

"Do you want to be frie-"

"No."

Rejected. Disappointed, but not surprised.

* * *

It's the second day of me being a part of this club and Hiratsuka-sensei hasn't said anything, even outside of club activity, she never once approaches me to ask how things are going. Which is strange, since she's the one who dragged me into this place in the first place. But if I know my homeroom teacher well, it's because she's still trying to get a read of the situation.

As calculative and perceptive she might be, she's surely considered the cons of putting together a quiet, merciless, cold as hell Ice Queen of a girl and a charming, questionably violent, allegedly playboy of a dude in the same room hasn't she? I suppose it's done out of worry for us. Hiratsuka-sensei is still a teacher of Soubu, after all. Though I may not agree with how she handle things, I know full well that her heart is at the right place.

But experience has told me a lot about people whose hearts are in the right place… and that, most of the time, they - themselves - aren't.

Just because your conscience is good, doesn't mean that the environment you're at is. In fact, I say that it's like that with most cases. Good people are only 'good' when they're distinguishable from the less likable people around them, at least that way, they themselves - or others - can be labeled as good.

While I'm not saying that there aren't genuinely good people out there, I am implying that the concept of an honest to god 'good' Samaritan is… quite rare in this day and age. Deep down inside, people are only 'good' for the sake of looking good, not doing good. I'm not saying that it's wrong wanting to 'look' good, it's quite the opposite.

There's nothing wrong in looking good, but it's a plus if people are doing good for the sake of doing good itself.

Although I understand why people would choose the former… it certainly is easier to look the part, rather than doing it…

But my moral alignment aside, this brings up a 'good' question.

Is what Yukinoshita Yukino doing a 'good thing'?

Is… her dream, ambition, to change others - and the world ultimately - generally a good thing?

Well, it depends.

But as far as a cringey school life goes, I'll say that it's good.

The sliding open of the club room's door draw our attention to it, our eyes flickering and darting towards the only entrance and exit to this room… unless you count the windows too.

"H-Hello… Hiratsuka-sensei told me that there're people here who co- w-wait, M-Maki?!"

Oho, looks like words travel fast.

Raising a hand, I flash our guest a smile. "Yo, Yui."

The girl standing underneath the door frame is none other than Yuigahama Yui, one of the girls here in Soubu who talks to me occasionally and not only for the sake of wanting to hook up. Hell, I'll even call her my friend since we do share each other's contact information.

A bright, bubbly and energetic lass with… um… two huge personalities _if you know what I mean?_ The type of gal' who'll get along with anyone and everyone easily if they ever allow her to, honestly. Personally, I find her to be sweet and genuinely pleasing to be around. Although she can get a little bit too loud sometimes.

Yes, I - the infamous troublemaker and prankster loudmouth - find her to be annoying from time to time.

Let's see… what else, what else…

She's quite the looker too, I'll tell you. In a completely different manner than Yukinoshita. But I guess, and I'm sure a lot of guys will agree with me here, her personality is a huge part of her charm. And she's quite fun and adorable to tease, I suppose.

Hair dyed in pink in a way that doesn't really remind of a certain someone from my old life - obvious sarcasm is obvious- it seems she's one of the few rare cases who's able to slip past Soubu's strict uniform and appearance rule. Although I'm sure that the prefects have had the pleasure of scolding her in the past before.

All in all, Yuigahama Yui's a… err… nice girl. Both in looks and character. She's a good girl. Oh yes indeed.

"U-Uwaaah… Maki, you're giving me one of those looks…" It's hard to say, but she's both embarrassed and disgusted at the same time, make up your goddamn mind girl!

"Uzumaki-kun, even if she's someone whom you have had the pleasure of knowing, it does not mean that you are obligated or even allowed to look at her with your animalistic and deviant eyes."

Sending the latter girl a glare, I say, "Oi, stop it with the insults will you? You're making us look bad in front of our client here."

"Correction. I am making _you_ look bad in front of our client."

Don't sound so damn proud while saying that, woman.

Bitchiness aside, Yukinoshita finally puts on her club president act and regards our client of the day. Coughing to her fist, she introduces herself.

"A pleasure to meet you. You must be Yuigahama Yui-san from class 2-F, no? The same class as this troglodyte?

"Oi."

"If that's the case, then I'd like to apologize. I know it must be hard and shameful having to spend the rest of your second year in the same class as this neanderthal."

"Why do you sound like you're actually sorry for that, huh?!"

"E-Eh… urm… yes." Yui responds, shyly. I suppose Yukinoshita's just that scary of a girl to even intimidate outgoing people like Yui. "How do you know my name?"

"Yeah, president, how do you know her name?" I egg on, smirking while keeping my arms crossed.

"Unlike a certain blonde haired caveman with his pea-sized brain, I made an effort to at least know some people from the other classes."

But I am quick to the draw. "If by effort you mean asking the teachers for the other classes' attendance list instead of going around asking for people's names yourself, then sure. Some effort you put there."

Rather than biting into my bait, she counters in a composed manner, "Effort does not always equal physical exertion, Uzumaki-kun. Although I understand if you do not know."

...okay, that's pretty good.

"...pft…!"

Eh?

With our heads swivelling towards the direction of contained laughter, both Yukinoshita and I get an eyeful of Yui who's trying her best to not burst out laughing. This pisses me off for some reason.

"If you wanna laugh, just laugh goddamnit!" I point a righteous finger at the pink haired bimbo, glaring while gnashing my teeth.

"Haha! I-It's just… hahaha… huff… it's just…!" She's hunched over forward, clutching her stomach as if she's just watched the entire season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine while trying to hold in her laughter but ends up failing. "Maki, you're totes, like, enjoying yourself here!"

...eh?

 _Eeeeeeh?_

Do I really look like I'm enjoying myself? Does being here and getting continuously assaulted by Yukinoshita's merciless remarks enjoyable for me? If so, then I must be some sort of twisted masochist.

"And, like, since when are you a member of a club?" Yui asks, finally regaining her bearings and no longer laughing. "Ah, is this why I haven't seen you around after school lately?"

Sighing, it seems like I've given her less credit than what she deserves. This girl can be perceptive at the most impeccable moments.

"Yeah, you're right." I spread my arms apart in a 'ta-da' manner. "I've been stuck here after school's over ever since yesterday, if someone would oh so kindly rescue me from this prison that'd be great, thanks."

Rather than skinning me alive, Yukinoshita settles for a piercing glare that can normally send a normal person into catatonic shock, but I'm anything but normal.

"So, Yuigahama-san." It seems she also settles on ignoring me. Fine by me. "How may we help you?"

"A-Ah, you see…"

And so-

* * *

-here we are in the Home Economics room. Might seem strange to those unfamiliar with, but our school does have these types of extra curricular lessons. Here, we mostly cook food. Yes, you hear me right. Although the lesson is not so often, we do learn how to cook stuffs here.

Just simple stuffs, mostly. Ranging from your home-cooked, traditional Japanese style breakfast and several easy to make western dishes.

I enjoy H.E class.

"Look, Yukinoshita, I say we bail. Right. Now."

But… unfortunately, just because you enjoy something, doesn't mean that you're good at it.

This is exceptionally true for Yui.

With me pinning her against the wall in the infamous 'Kabedon' position, she has all legal rights to put a restraining order on me if she wants to, but this isn't the case.

"W-What do you mean, Uzumaki-kun?" I'm sorry, I know it's hard to breathe, but bear with me here. "A-And… um… y-you're too close…"

"Bear with me here." I hold my breath, releasing them shortly after. "Look, we can't allow Yui to cook."

Yukinoshita, still flushed from the proximity of our bodies, does a poor attempt to recompose herself. "O-Oh? And why's that?"

"Yui's a terrible cook." I say, my voice dead serious. "The last time she cooked for someone is during Home Economics class two weeks ago."

"S-So?"

"Everyone who was in her group had to be sent to the hospital from food poisoning." I stresses out, hissing and making sure to keep my voice to a minimum. "And she's technically banned from entering here, but since this is club activity, we can't help it."

She shifts on her spot, her right hand is in front of her chest; taking up a defensive stance. "I-Is that so… by the way, you're so close right now, i-is this necessary?"

"I don't wanna her to hear us while she's busy getting the ingredients ready."

Speaking of the ditz, she's over there at the other end of the room searching for ingredients.

"O-Oh…" Coughing to her fist, Yukinoshita tries but fails to look me straight in the eyes. "Then… er… how do you suppose we do this? Not letting her make the cookies would be cruel."

I finally pushed myself off the wall, ultimately giving Yukinoshita the much needed space she needs. Scratching my chin, I begin contemplating.

"We can't let her bake on her own, that's for sure… but I don't think things'll turn good even with our supervision." I grimace.

I begin to see the look of worry surface on the Ice Queen's face. "I-Is she that bad?"

" _That_ bad." I pause. "Worse if we're talking about real food."

The two of us swivel our heads towards the pink haired girl, who's just about done gathering the needed ingredients in order to make the cookies. Giving Yukinoshita one last look, I say,

"If she plans on giving those cookies to someone, I pity the poor soul who'll have to accept them."

"What makes you so sure that they'll even accept the cookies in the first place?"

Sighing, I chuckle hollowly. "Girls like Yui rank third in the 'Things Uzumaki Naruto Finds Scary' index."

"...what is with that awfully ridiculous na-"

But I ignore her. "Her type of girls are dangerously lethal to adolescent young boys, much like the students here in Soubu. They strike where it's obvious, effectively so…" I muse, drawing in every single bit of spite inside of me. "Yet, at the same time, there's a high chance they're oblivious to everything they do. Like fire to a moth, I suppose."

I can feel Yukinoshita staring at me, giving me a look which indicates that she's currently reading me. Then, she says, "Speaking from experience?"

Glancing towards her, I smile. "Like many things in life."

Her stare lingers at me, and I can confirm that she has been trying to get a read of me up until now. She's free to try, but sorry girly, this old man's not so easy to crack.

"Hey guys!" Yui calls out to us, waving for our attention. "I've prepared everything! Let's start already!"

"Welp," I mutter, rolling my shoulders before pulling out an apron which I have kept folded inside my pocket, "let's just see how this goes… but make sure to have a couple extra batches ready, just in case."

With that said, I give Yukinoshita a reassuring smirk.

* * *

"I cannot believe this is even possible."

"I know it's possible, but I still can't believe I was right."

"...uuuu… you guys are so mean…"

Ignoring the pink haired girl who appears to be on the verge of tears, we stare at the hazardous concoction of what used to be baking ingredients placed on the tray laid on top of the serving counter. From the way Yukinoshita's looking at the thing, I can say that I'm probably the second most offensive thing to her at this very moment.

The cookies that we are supposed to make turns out to be a batch of completely irredeemable, inedible and downright repulsive cookies. If they can be called cookies.

Uwaaah… I swear it's radioactive. Where did I put my Geiger counter…?

They're completely black in color, like, _vantablack_ black yet it's... emitting this strange glow at the same time. Anyone with a decent head on their shoulders will definitely think that these… things… aren't safe for consumption.

"Wait a moment," I place a palm over my mouth, making gagging gestures, "okay, I'm fine… just about to lose my lunch there."

"You're mean! You're mean! You're so mean Maki!" Yui comes up rushing at me and proceeds to hit me multiple times on my chest with her fists. It doesn't hurt, just, annoying.

Using a pair of thongs, Yukinoshita lifts up the failed experiment with the cautiousness and dexterity of a nuclear disposal scientist.

"I… think it's best to let me and Uzumaki-kun handle the next few batches of cookies, Yuigahama-san."

"O-Okay…" Getting upset won't change the fact that your cookies are inedible, Yui. "But can you bake, Maki? I know you can cook…"

I interrupt her, cutting her off with the politeness of a swearing nun. "Of course I can! In fact, " pulling out my phone, I browse it for a few minutes, before showing the two girls a picture, "I'm a certified baker!"

"Whoa! Y-You're dressed in a chef's uniform and all!" Yui all but gushes, her face turning into the same color of her hair. "When and where is this?!"

"I helped out in several bakeries and pastry shops nearby." I say, letting the girls take a gander at the picture on my phone.

It's a picture of me dressed in a chef's uniform along several kitchen staffs, posing for a picture. Aside from that, there's really nothing to say.

"Most compensated me for the work I did, and I was happy to help. Win-win situation at its finest."

"Interesting." Wow, even Yukinoshita is impressed. I guess this is the closest I'll ever come to making her praise me. "Well, let us see if that uniform is just for show or not, shall we?"

Oh it's on like Donkey Kong, sister.

When it comes to baking, there are two important things that you need to consider before you even _start_ baking. One, and probably the most important out of the two, is the oven. Please, for the love of every pastry chefs out there in the world, preheat your oven. You don't want to bake something while oven's still cold, it's just inefficient and you'll screw up even the most basic of recipes. And two, scale your ingredients. Whether you're using standardized measurements or any local variations, please make it a necessity to scale your ingredients. Unless we're talking about inclusions, in that case, let yourself loose within reasons.

Once you've preheated your oven and have your mise en place ready, it's time to make the food itself. Since we're just making cookies here, it should be simple… or maaaaaybe not so much for Yui.

So, ahem, basic cookies. We're doing a simple and traditional rolled cut cookies. It can't be any simpler, ladies and gentlemen… yet here we are, in the aftermath of failure.

"Oh would you stop giving me that look already, Maki?!"

So, ingredients, just your standard stuff. Flour, eggs, sugar, vanilla essence, butter and the necessary leavening agent ; in this case, baking powder. Save up your time and spare yourself from having to clean more bowls by measuring using a cup or measuring spoons. But since we're not lazy people and a scale is the only thing we have for measurement in this room, combine the dry ingredients together into one big bowl. This means putting your flour and baking powder in the same bowl, they're dry ingredients.

So first step is to cream your butter together with your sugar. In the business, this is known simply as the creaming method. Most cookie recipes call for this one method because it's the simplest and safest way to achieve a consistent result of cookies, provided if you don't screw up the baking process later on.

When you're beating the butter and sugar together, you're quickly aerating the butter while slowly evenly distributing the sugar. But, remember, don't over-beat or over-whip your butter; in fact, don't whip it, that is only reserved for creams and meringues.

Or in Yui's case, you might as well use a drill with a whisk attachment on.

"Why do I feel like you're talking smack about me while you're baking, Maki?" Well, she has good intuition for once.

Once the butter is light in color and fluffy in texture, it's time to add the liquids. In this case, our eggs and essence. I guess you can add milk or whatever in it too, but that's not what we're going to do today. You can, of course, combine your essence and eggs and beat them together to save time during the mise en place stage, but that is up to your preference and time conserving policies. But I did it. Why not?

Slowly pour in your eggs if you've beat them together with the essence like mine, or do it one yolk at a time and then add in the essence. But, again, be careful in whisking. You're making cookies, not trying to revive your dead cat. Once all the eggs and the fluffy butter and sugar mixture are combined, you should end up in something looking like slurry in visual. Wet to the touch, but it maintains its shape.

Next, add in your flour and dry ingredients. But slowly. I cannot stress you how important it is to slowly add in your flour. One, you'll make a mess of your working station if you just dump in all of the flour at once. And, two, you might just decide to add in a little bit less flour than the recipe requires - which is sometimes the case - so use your eyes to judge.

Now, ditch the whisk and grab a rubber or plastic spatula; or use a wooden spoon if you're brave enough. Fold in the flour into the butter, meaning you want to slowly cover the butter and egg mixture with the spatula. The air that you've incorporated into the butter during the creaming process is fragile, so try not to ruin the volume by having a rave concert while you're folding in the ingredients.

Take your time and once everything is combined into one solid dough, you can move on to your work surface. Which, I'm sure, you've covered in a little bit of flour.

Depending on the amount of flour you're using, the dough's should at least be firm enough to be played around. Cookie dough is, after all, the adult's play doh.

At this stage, you can do two things.

You can cool the dough inside a chiller to let it firm up and making the rolling process easier, but consume more waiting time. Or you can just carefully roll the dough out and proceed to the cutting process.

Or you can be like me and do what I'm about to do now.

"Hey, uh, Yukinoshita?" I walk over to the working girl with a wrapped down in hand.

"What is it?" She doesn't even bother looking up from her task, which is good in practice but bad in mannerism.

"Can you hold this dough close to your chest for me?"

She immediately stops whatever it is she's doing, looking at me in confusion. "Why?"

I hand her the dough and say, "Oh, I'm just using your cold, cold heart to chill my dou-OI! DON'T THROW THE DOUGH BACK AT ME WOMAN!"

Well, I tried, so onto plan B. The freezer.

Just pop it in there for ten minutes and your dough should be firm enough to handle. And, yeah, that's the case here. Once it's firm enough, I bring it back to my work surface for rolling. Flouring a wooden rolling pin, I begin rolling out the dough. You're just going to want to roll the dough thin enough, not too thin. Use the thickness of your pinky finger, if it helps.

"Yui, what shape do you want?" I ask our client while simultaneously holding up a small case filled with cookie cutters of various shapes.

"Let's see…" the girl walks up towards me to examine the cutters. "Aha! These star shaped ones are cute! But the hearts aren't so bad either… wait, what's this one? Oh gosh, they're shaped like dogs!"

"Just choose one already."

"Muu… you don't have to hurry me like that." Pouting won't do you anything here, girly. "But I guess… the h-heart shaped ones are... _mumble… mumble…_ "

"Okay, the heart shaped ones it is." I don't bother asking her again.

So, once you have your dough rolled out, just cut them with whatever mold you desire. I'm using the heart shaped once since Yui wants it that way.

"Ne, Maki?"

"Hm?"

"Can I help?"

"..."

"Oh c'mon, it's just cutting the cookies!"

"Okay, sure." But I'm saying this with hesitation, ladies and gentlemen.

"Yay!"

Letting Yui cut the cookies, I begin prepping the baking tray. Now, if you're like us and don't have a cooking spray at hand, you can use the butter to grease the tray's surface to prevent sticking.

"Maki, I'm done!" Yui calls out to me, finally finished with the cutting.

"Good, now lift up the cookies and place them on the tray. Make sure to give them enough space to let the heat distribute evenly."

"'Kay!"

I suppose letting her do this step is safe too, I mean, there's no real cooking involved in it anyway. Once done, we walk towards our preheated 200 degree celsius oven and place the tray in the middle of the oven.

"How long are these supposed to bake, Maki?"

"Around six to eight minutes. Depends." I shrug. "Maybe it'll take a shorter time to cook, or longer. But, hey, that's you cooking right there."

Setting my timer, I am approached by Yukinoshita who's carrying her own batch of unbaked cookies.

"Do we have enough room inside the oven?" She asks while carrying the cookie filled tray. Weirdly, she's showing signs of struggle. What, is that tray really that heavy for you?

"We do." I say, offering my hand to her. "Let me place it inside, go sit down or something. You look like you've taken the entire city of Chiba and pushed it somewhere else." **(5)**

"What?"

Oh, she doesn't get the reference. Balls. "Nevermind." Holding her tray, I open the oven door and place Yukinoshita's tray next to mine. "What's your ETA?"

"Six minutes."

"Same time as mine then, neat." Crossing my arms, I begin untying the half apron that we're all wearing ever since the moment we started baking. "Well, all that's left is to wait for the cookies to finish baking. Now, Yui, is there anything else we can help you with?"

But before Yui can say anything, Yukinoshita speaks first. "I'm surprised you are being so helpful, Uzumaki-kun. I was not aware you're capable of such things."

Levelling the black haired club president a mild glare, a frown forms on my face. "She is a client, our client." Walking over to the counter where Yui's… uh… 'cookies' are, I prop my hands on the surface. "I'm already dragged into the club far enough as it is, don't see any reason to do things half-assedly."

Picking up one of the burnt, coal-like, and definitely lethal cookies, I take a bite.

 _Oh god…_

It's like… it's like eating charcoal straight from the bag.

Once you've taste poison, you might as well finish the meal. That way, you'll make as fine a dish as any. **(6)**

Not long later, the cookies are done. And it is time for test tasting.

Naturally, Yui gets to go first. She takes one of mine and Yukinoshita's cookies, testing them in order.

"Hmm~! This is so good Maki! I never knew you could bake this good!" She looks happy enough, looks like it's better than I expected. But still, it's such a simple recipe. "And yours too, Yukinon! I like the cinnamon flavor you used!"

"Y-Yukinon…?"

Looks like Yukinoshita needs to get used to her new nickname. Yui's very fond of giving nicknames to people, trust me, I know. I've been 'Maki' ever since Yui and I met.

"You'll get used to it." Even after I say that, it still doesn't stop Yukinoshita from giving me a dubious stare. "Anyhow, Yui, here are your cookies. What're you going to do now?"

Scratching her chin with the edge of her nail, my classmate puts on a rare thinking look.

"I'll keep them." She says, after a few seconds of thinking. "I took down some notes while you guys were baking earlier and mama and papa will definitely enjoy the cookies you guys made."

Well, as long as they don't end up as a waste, I'm fine with it. Looks like Yukinoshita's fine too. And I manage to get a sample of her cookies before; Yui's right, they are delicious.

"Then, I suppose, this marks the end of your request; Yuigahama-san?" asks the black haired club president, folding her apron neatly to pack later on.

"Yup! But… eh…" Somehow, she's back to looking unsure. Nervous, even. Looking at the first batch of cookies she'd made herself, a frown forms on my pink haired classmate's face. "I guess those are a fail, huh?"

"Well, duh." What, why're you both glaring at me like that? Sighing, I scratch the back of my head. "But, if you must know, Yui… boys are simple creatures. As long as it's from a girl, they'll be happy." I pause. "Even if they're consuming potentially hazardous food." A smile. "I'm sure they'll still be happy."

"Moou! I'm gonna cry if you keep on saying that!"

But, to my credit, she doesn't.

After spending the entire evening helping Yui make a decent batch of cookies on her own, Yukinoshita and I return to our club room.

While I am busy tidying up my things into my bag, the only other person in the room breaks the silence.

"Are you sure that it is wise to explicitly help Yuigahama-san when she should have done all by herself?" she asks me.

And to that, I say, "Some people learn from listening to instructions, others learn by seeing the way others do things that have been instructed to them."

I might've been too wordy with my sentence there, but it gets the point across.

"...from experience?" she asks.

I chuckle. "Like many things." I say. "Not all people learn easily even through experience. Sometimes, they need to fall first before they can learn. I've been at her shoes, once. My first time doing pastry making… or if you could call it that."

The King had to ban me from making any pastry or culinary related thing in France, at that time.

In France, dude didn't say anything about Japan.

"But letting her learn, regardless, would have done greater justice in my opinion." I can taste the bitterness in your voice, Yukinoshita. You have something you want to share?

I nod. "Maybe. But what's stopping me from helping her?"

You?

Or Yui herself?

Nothing.

People, no matter how capable they are, will always require assistance. Doesn't matter how much of an MLG or RPG pro or whatever acronyms you whipper-snappers have you are; there will be a time when you'll need people to help you.

Even the Joestars need help, and they're awesome people.

"My… you're quite a softie, are you not, Uzumaki-kun?" I raise an eyebrow at her remark. "Although, it is understandable… Yuigahama-san is an attractive person after all."

When will this kid learn…?

"Look, if you're thinking that I'm being nice to her just because Yui's a little bit better looking than some of the girls in class, you're dead wrong."

"Oh?"

"I mean, I'm an ass to you, aren't I?"

"...good point." Ohoho, don't think I'm flattering you, girly.

A tiring day of school is done once again! Now, a few more days, and then I'll be saying hello to the weekend in no time!

Finally done with club activities, I make my way home from school. I live not too far from school, which is a plus, since I don't have to waste money on transport like train and whatnot. Besides, that means literally every day is leg day for me.

The evening streets of surrounding city is already bustling with after-work hour activities. Young couples are going on after school dates, hard working white collared workers are off venting a tiring day's worth of work away in the local pubs; and there's people like me who's coming home from club activities.

I mostly tune out the crowd and traffic, my mind entering an internal state of self focus while my body moseys through the urban jungle. My place is on the next block, you see. It normally takes me fifteen to twenty minutes to walk back home from school, but today's been a long day; I find myself walking in a much slower pace than usual.

 **Bzzzt Bzzzt**

Oho?

"Hello, Uzumaki speaking?"

" _Uzumaki? It's me. I'm calling from a co-worker's phone, since mine's charging. Anyway, you have a client right now."_

I raise my eyebrows. "So sudden. Was it a last minute decision?"

" _Yeah, you know how it goes. I'll text you the need-to-knows in a sec, and you're probably on the way home from school, right?"_

"Yeah."

" _Go buy yourself some clothing at a ZARA or Uniqlo or something, the company will cover for you."_

ZARA, huh? Must be an important client. Oh well.

"Alright. 'Be hearing more from you, Tanaka-san."

" _Hm."_

My phone convos with her always end up short and straight to the point, very efficient. Welp, judging from that conversation, looks like I can't afford to rest easy just yet. A sudden request like this one means someone paid lots of money just to cut in the request line… so a VIP, basically.

Haah… looks like I won't be getting much sleep tonight either.

* * *

 **1:** A reference to the famous OST from the 6th installment of Touhou Project. U.N Owen itself is reference to Agatha Christie's novel, but in this case, it's a pun of some sort. **U** zumaki. **N** aruto **Owen was him** (her) **?**

 **2:** It's, uh, it's a Spongebob reference.

 **3:** A reference to Haruhi from The Haruhi Suzumiya series. She can be quite the dictator.

 **4:** I'm not gonna spoil anything to those who haven't seen Haruhi (seriously, how and why) so don't me.

 **5:** Another Spongebob reference. Yes, I love Spongebob.

 **6:** A variation of Holo's quote from Spice and Wolf. Very fitting, if you ask me. Or did I fit the scene to match the quote? _Hmmmm?_

* * *

 **So, finally, the rewrite is here.**

 **As you guys might have noticed, there are already different things going on with this rewrite. You might ask me why, well to you, I say:**

 **Why not?**

 **It's a rewrite, there's bound to be new ideas and things when compared to the older version. Not to mention, I'm hoping to go on a different direction this time, completely disregarding previous pathways and even some ideas. Naturally, this means you probably won't see some of the scenes you like that you found in the previous story here… but why would you, you can just read the old one for that…**

 **But, don't be afraid, I do intend to see through this until the very end. Will things be different? Definitely. Is Naruto still a little bit OOC? Heck yeah. Will there be pairings? HELL-yeah, as for that, I don't know.**

 **Please guys, do not - I repeat - do** _ **not**_ **pressure me into prematurely deciding on pairings. I don't want that to happen, which is why I'm making Naruto's character a little bit less relatable, meaning he will have a harder time to connect with the people around him and vice versa. I've also received complaints about the previous Naruto being a clone of 8man, so I've made sure to remedy that in this iteration of him.**

 **As for the genre, well, you might notice that things turned a little bit too 'Shokugeki-like' at the end there. But that's part of the story and will definitely have their own plot to discover. And, honestly, it's a concept that I'm familiar with in real life; something which is easy for me to associate and put into writing. It also adds a difference in some of the characters', well, character. Naruto especially.**

 **Again, this can mean that some of you won't like what you're about to read. And, like always, nothing I can do will change that.**

 **I guess that is all I'll say for now. The next chapter might take longer, but I can say that it will be released eventually.**

 **Much thanks,**

 **Rain**


	2. Chapter 2

**Just the first chapter and already that many followers?**

 **A surprise, for sure. But a welcomed one at that.**

 **Enough with my tasteless pop-culture references, on to the story!**

 **Warning: Lemon scene down below, discretion is advised.**

* * *

The human race is the only existence on earth to truly understand the meaning of value. It might be more accurate to say we are the ones to give meaning to things in the first place, followed by the values that are later associated with it.

We start from rocks, then lands, eventually, we even start giving papers value. All in all, we have come far. So far. With time, the value of certain things may either decrease or increase; this is why we have the ever changing rates of currency and materials.

Of course, when you're so far up high the social ladder, the more familiar you will be with these things, the higher the chance you will worry should things… change. I find it ironic. Those that are sitting on the top of the social ladder are the ones that are worried more about how things are going down below.

It just goes to show that everyone in society has a role to fill. Sure, it's not as easy as it is back in the days - you can't just appoint someone from the middle class to take care of your farm and cattle all willy nilly - but take it from some old dude who has lived to see both world wars happen; things have changed, both for the better and worse.

But I'll settle on saying that things are way better than they are back then.

The age of information, baby. Nothing can beat the feeling of being able to access information at the push of a button.

"In one ear, out the other... huh Uzumaki?"

It'll be good if I can get myself off shitty situations in a push of the same button, though.

"Look, it's not what you think it is, I got a legitimate reason this time."

A fierce glare. Oooh, it makes me flinch.

"Something as weak as 'staying up late because I have shit to do' isn't gonna do you any good, Uzumaki." I can already see the dust exhaling from her nostrils. "It's a surprise that I'm letting you off easy after all this time."

Again, I've found myself in a similar predicament like last time.

It has been a week ever since my… err… integration into the service club. Throughout that whole one week, aside from the constant visits from Yui, we haven't done even one request; be it legit or some other. That means we've been spending time inside the classroom eating biscuits and drinking tea… accompanied by the ever so constant bickering between me and Yukinoshita.

I can say for sure, right now, I don't like that girl. She always find new ways to annoy me, whether it's through insults or the way she's treating me.

Maybe both.

Yeah, it's both.

God… and here I am thinking I won't have to deal the same shit Kyon went through… goddammit, Kyon, just how the hell do you deal with it?!

Never mind my directed frustration towards a certain mysterious high schooler, right now, I'm having enough problems dealing with reality. The reality being a hair's breadth away from capital punishment courtesy of Hiratsuka-sensei.

"Look, here, let me explain first will you?"

But, unfortunately for you sensei, I have a free pass this time.

Reaching inside my blazer's pocket, I pull out a formal looking thin slip of paper. The moment her eyes land on it, sensei's expression changes. I hand her the thin envelope which contains the only non-violent way of getting out of this mess. Hopefully.

No longer leaning on her chair's backrest, she snags the thing right out of my hand. Pulling out her car's key, she uses the thing as a mock letter opener.

While she is engrossed on the written document I've presented her, I have to repeatedly tell myself that there's nothing to worry about.

Tanaka-san told me that the document is legit and that they put their best effort to make things look as convincing as possible… which means they thread on the legal line just to procure this slip. But it's a given. The line of work I'm working will only invite trouble if someone like Hiratsuka-sensei knows.

"A letter of notification… guardian… part time job?" She looks so surprised, judging by the way her eyes widened. Apparently, she doesn't know that I'm an orphan. Well, it's the most believable scenario that I can weave. "...will be late… unknown duration…"

She spends several more minutes reading the damn paper. I guess it's to be expected. She is our language and literature teacher, after all. Hell, she's probably proofreading the damned thing too.

Oho, she's finally done.

"...this is…" she takes a while, presumably trying to find the correct word to describe what she's just read. "Surprising."

Ah, how concise. As expected of our language and literature teacher.

She holds the slip of written document in between her fingers, staring off into space as if her mind is caught up on something.

"You're… a janitor?"

...she could've said it better, damn it.

Shrugging my shoulders, I give her one of my best casual looks. "I do cleaning, if that's what you're asking."

Again, she could've word it out better… but, I suppose it'll work.

Slowly placing the slip on her desk, sensei pinches the bridge of her nose with her fingers as an attempt to cope with whatever's been dumped on her by that slip of paper.

"All this time you've been working overnight as a cleaning service?" She sounds like she is in disbelief. I mean, I guess it kinda is? But I don't see why it's that strange.

"The only shift they can offer me are the ones late at night." I tell her with the most convincing voice I can muster. "So, yeah, it's not like I can help it either way. In this day and age, even high school students like me need money."

"But there are other jobs out there than something as… shady as this." She crosses both arms underneath her chest, unknowingly making me wonder even more how in the nine freaking hells is she still single after all this time. "The Japanese economy isn't that down in the drain yet, you know.

Haha, 'yet', she says.

Rolling my shoulders, I sigh. "Look, it's complicated, okay?" I cross my arms, both as a way to relax and of defiance. "It's the only job within the list that's both easy and well paid. If you think it's shady, you should've seen the other ones I've been offered."

I'm not exactly lying here. I've been offered far shadier jobs than the one I have now.

The frown is still ever so present on her face. Looks like she's not content just yet. Hiratsuka-sensei picks up the slip once again. "And your… guardian… she agreed to this?"

I look away. Not out of refusal to answer her question, but as an attempt to mimic hesitation.

"Yes, she did." I give my answer. "Can we not talk about her? I'm bothering her enough already just by being under her care, why did you think I'm working the job in the first place?"

Since I am an orphan with no known living relatives, Tanaka-san also acts as my guardian. It make things a whole lot easier on paper. Remember, I'm registered as a minor still. It's normally like this for me. Every time I move, I will always have a scenario on the play by play. But all of them have remained consistent throughout the times.

I do not age. More like I can't. So, for the past hundreds of years of living in this blue earth, I've been stuck playing the role of a teenager - young adult at best. It can be quite inconvenient not being to physically age, let me tell you. Back then, they didn't really care whether you're young or old. As long as you can pull your own weight and work, others will treat you as an adult.

But in the modern age like now, it's getting even harder for me to act more independent. Society, itself, has declared that it is necessary for people under a certain age to have people responsible over them; meaning they are limited to the things their guardians approve of or say.

Long story short, I'm stuck as a kid and has to 'refresh' my identity every thirty years or so… forty, if I can convince people good enough. But lately, people are getting harder to 'fool'.

But does this justifies the reason of me lying to Hiratsuka-sensei? No. You can never justify a lie, no matter how look at it. A lie is a lie, period. Whether it's for good or bad, it is still a lie.

After a few minutes of silence, Hiratsuka-sensei looks like she's ready to say something. I can tell what she is about to say without even doubting myself.

"Sorry… I didn't know." Sensei's eyes soften. Looks like she really doesn't know that I'm an orphan after all. Then her eyes retain the steely look they have moments ago. "But the fact that she wrote and signed this slip herself means that she approves of you working ridiculous hours!"

"Yeah, but that's only because I want to." I just need to play the part right. I need to convince her that I'm doing this for a reason. "Look." I sigh. "I just don't want to… burden her."

C'mon Naruto, act like you've never act before!

"She took me in, even when she's got a kid of her own to raise. The least I could do is this. It's bad enough that she's already paying for my tuition…" This isn't a lie, though. Most of the money I make off my job goes to my tuition.

Now that she knows of my condition, there's no reason to doubt why I'm doing such a ridiculous job in the first place. Tanaka-san and I have been practicing and rehearsing this whole entire thing ever since she becomes my handler. Aside from the cleaning service gig, I'm not lying.

The reason why I bother going through all of this is because it's better to settle things now than later. Hiratsuka-sensei is a perceptive and sharp person, if I'm outright lying to her, she'll know and there will be hell to pay. But even she will have to believe something like this. Although it still doesn't explain why she never knows that I'm an orphan. Did she automatically assume that Tanaka-san is my mother or something?

"...I understand."

Aw yiss.

"But I'm still against you working this job of yours, Uzumaki."

...damn it.

"No matter how it sounds, it's still unreasonable that a high school kid like you have to work so late into the night; it's even more absurd that your legal guardian of all people approved of this. Did you pressure her into this?"

"Yes." I answer without missing a beat. I need to show her that I'm confident, that way, it will deter future suspicions of it being an entirely different matter.

"Ah, so that's why."

Whew, bullet dodged.

"Then maybe you shouldn't have pressured her into letting you keep that job, hm?" W-Wait, sensei, why is your face scary? "Since you're so damn stubborn of wanting to keep that job, at the end of the day, the blame's still on you."

"B-But!"

"No buts!" She glares at me. "At the end of the day, you're late! I'll be expecting the usual from you tomorrow." Her tone leaves no room for debate.

But, hey, this could've gone worse. Still… a four paged written essay about the Japanese infrastructure and why is it failing isn't a very easy topic to write about…

Bah, I'll take it.

"And before you go, Uzumaki."

"Hm?"

Sensei returns me my written slip. The fierce look on her face disappears, it's gone. It has been replaced by a solemn one. "I'm sorry, I didn't know that you're an…"

"It's fine." I cut her off. "You're not the only one, but unlike those people, you should know." You're the teacher, after all.

"I just assumed that your current guardian is your legitimate… yeah, I'll take this one. Get out of here."

With that, I leave for second period.

* * *

What is it that makes a person a person? Now, don't point the fingers at me just yet, let me explain.

Obviously, a person is a person simply just by existing. A man is a man because he is born a man. He or she is a human person born with the necessary mental, physical and psychological characteristics to be defined as such; thus labeling him or her as a person. This makes sense.

Yet… why is it that some people pretend that they're… not?

If they're not pretending they're not human, they'll pretend that they're someone else entirely; they pretend to be someone they are not.

"Hey, look at this, isn't this cute?"

"What? Oh, yeah, totally! Isn't this one too?"

"So, I heard that you and Sawa-chan are…"

"Oh stop it will you!"

I am not one to judge, but I'm not a stranger on making assumptions. After all, I have a good four to five hundred years of experience or so under my belt. I've seen the same thing play out several times yet with different beginnings and endings.

It's the same meal and dance, yet with different plates and tunes.

From where I am sitting, I can hear - without even trying to do so - the unrestrained chattering my classmates are making. They range differently from meaningful friendly conversations, to laid back and pointless ones with no particular topic or whatsoever. This is normal, since we're in a school after all. It's expected of students to chat with each other and make friends.

But what I do know is that not all kids here truly enjoy what they're doing.

No siree.

There's a difference between enjoying something out of genuine passion and enjoying something because a friend of yours likes doing it too. One will make you feel general better about yourself while the other suppresses your character. Guess which is which.

"Ah, Uzumaki-kun~ why don't you join us for karaoke later?"

"Yeah, yeah! We're going to have so much fun!"

This kind of conversation is normal for me, believe it or not. Sure, it's what you might call a 'normie' type of conversation, but it's hard to avoid attention when people consider you as the school's bicycle.

And, no, that is solely an expression.

"Sorry, I have to meet with someone later today." I wink, causing the two girls to squeal. "Maybe next time?"

"See, see! I told you he's with someone!"

"Oh my god! I can't blame them though, grr… I'm so jealous of whoever's Uzumaki-kun meeting!"

"Ne, ne, you think he'll… kyaaa!"

Heh, still got it.

Without even looking, I'm aware of the mixed reactions my classmates are giving me. They range from pure disgust to healthy jealousy. Naturally, this kind of reaction is normal. I do have quite a… uh… let's say promiscuous reputation in school. And although I can never confirm their legitimacy openly, unless I want consequences, I can discreetly say that it is within the realms of reason.

I've been a prime suspect ever since I know it, don't get me wrong. People have been spreading rumors about me being the town's bicycle ever since I begin working for Tanaka-san's agency, which is pretty much the start of my school term here in Soubu. Apparently, I just give off that kind of air and people have been picking it up as it is. Well, my constant escapades with the third years and first years and even some of my second year classmates help cement that allegation; much to my chagrin.

But there's nothing I can do about it, unless I want something straight out of a Japanese drama series happening. And, so far, there's nothing I have to concern myself with just yet. My profession has been a well kept secret so far and if I remain careful and vigilant, it will continue to be so until the end of high school. But God knows I shouldn't tempt fate, She's already too big of a bitch to handle even if I don't believe in Her.

"Maki…" A very soft voice mutters in worry close to my ears. Unsurprisingly, it's who I think it is. "..."

Looking up, I meet eyes with the only girl I can openly call my friend in this school. I give her a reassuring smile.

Look, I'm not dumb.

I'm an idiot, not dumb.

Maybe I was some time in the past, but certainly not now. Try living for five hundred years, you'll get the eye opening experience you can never imagine. I can only remain naive and obtuse for so long… I'm bound to pick up things like these from time to time, especially when the girl in question isn't being very subtle about it herself.

You see, Yuigahama Yui is a nice girl. And you can bet your ass she is.

She is a nice girl to a tee and that is a fact. She is nice to everyone she meets, regardless of relation. Within reasons, of course. I don't think even Yui will find the idea of talking with a death row inmate something she can take with a smile on her face.

But, I can - without a doubt - say that she's even nicer to the people she is close with.

Or the person she _wants_ to be closer to, to be more accurate.

Looking at her face, I can definitely say she is worried. For what exactly, I cannot say as doing so will not only be wrong; it will also be inconsiderate of me to her. After all, it is not my place to say anything about her fancy…

...although it is my place to _answer_.

Standing up, I plant a palm on the top of her head.

"H-Hey, what are you… gah! S-Stop it! You're messing my hair!"

Aaaaand ruffle her hair like crazy!

After making a mess out of her hair, something which must have taken her all morning to prep, Yui gives me this cute but sort of pitiful glare with teary eyes.

"Moou… you can be so mean sometimes, Maki…"

I… really do treasure this girl. She's… she's…

She's special to me.

"I'm only mean to you, Yui." A little bit of smile and a wink are all it takes to change her complexion to that of a tomato's.

I can't exactly say what is it that makes her special… but I've met people like her before throughout my life. They struck me the same way Yui does, always pulling at the right string to make me… feel. And I thought I've lived for far too long to even feel. But no, people like Yui have proven me otherwise.

"M-Ma…" Sputtering while her face continues to grow redder and redder by the second. Seeing as speech or anything resembling it isn't an option for her, she settles with taking in a huge breath of air as an attempt to calm herself down. "Uuuu… baka Maki."

Yeah… I guess I am.

While I'm interacting with Yui, it's not hard to notice the distinctive set of looks I'm getting from a certain group. At least six set of eyes have been eyeing me the moment Yui strikes up conversation with me.

' _...looks like Yui's clique onto me again…'_ Especially that blonde haired chick, what's her name, Yukiko?

But, I recognize those eyes. Those are the eyes of someone who's worried, they're worried for Yui.

Or is it?

"Hey." I whisper, getting Yui's attention. "Your friends over there look like they're about to strangle me. Why don't you go to them before that happens, hm?"

Now recovered from being flustered, Yui giggles. "Hehehe, you know it's not like that, Maki. They're good people, y'know, I know, why don't I introduce you to them?"

Oho, so that's her technique, eh? Not bad, then again, Yui is a nice girl. Nice girls are naturally like this. They are very considerate of those close to them, even as far as willing to introduce outsiders to a group they're part of.

There's nothing wrong with this, mind you, it's just that; any other guy might be getting the wrong idea if they happen to be in my shoes right now. They'll think that they're 'special', but in reality, that's just how Yui is. And before anything can be done, the damage has been dealt. The arrow of love has been planted into their hearts, they'll confess their love in public, get rejected and boom; there goes their social life.

Yeah, I'm _toooootally_ not speaking from experience.

Folding my arms on my desk, I lean forward to rest my chin on the empty space. "Nah, I'll stick with being alone and miserable for a little bit longer, thank you very much."

"Muu… Maki, that's not a very good thing to say about yourself, you know?"

Heh… I know, Yui… I know.

"...it's the only nice thing I can say about myself."

"Hm, what was that Maki?"

Oh crap. Me and my big mouth. Shaking my head, I pull out the most neutral looking expression I can muster.

"Nothing, it's nothing." Stretching my arms up, I let out a satisfied sigh. "Gosh, I'm just so tired today."

"You're always tired Maki, hahaha!" Whew, looks like she bought it. "Ne, speaking of which… just why is it you're always tired?" Yui does this cute little head tilt while placing a finger on her bottom lip.

Kuh… an airhead she may be, she sure as heck can be sharp at the right moment. Anyway, I can't tell Yui about my real job.

"You see… actually…"

So, I tell her the need-to-knows.

"Heeeh!? Maki, you're a janitor!?"

" _Can you please not shout it out?!"_

Sheesh… what's so surprising about me being a janitor, huh? I'll have you know that janitorial jobs are honest jobs and is one of the most important job positions in society! In fact, I can confidently say that they are the backbone of all megacorporations! So, don't forget to thank the cleaning lady or someone similar.

Bus drivers aren't the only people you should be thanking, yo.

Now she has the gal to look all sorry and ditzy and all that… well, it works though, since she is naturally a klutz. "Hehehe… sorry about that, Maki." Sheesh, whatever, it's a good thing that these kids have the attention span of a goldfish. "But… it's surprising that Maki has a job, it's not very common with kids our age…"

Haaah… sometimes, I can only wonder if she is as air headed as she shows. Although, I can see where she is coming from. There are not many students from Soubu who have part time jobs outside of school, since they're well off enough as it is; Soubu is quite a high-spec school after all. And I can't speak for everyone.

"Well, I gotta find money in some way or another." I say to her. "You know about my situation, Yui."

"O-Oh, right…" Damn it, now I feel like an asshole for some reason.

"But don't worry about it, I know what I'm doing." Heh, I sure hope so. "Everything's been fine, aside from the constant lateness and all that… although I'll appreciate it even more if Hiratsuka-sensei lays off my ass every once in a while."

Hearing my complaint, if you can even call something as a reasonable as that a complaint, Yui sighs. She looks at me, sheepishly, with a crooked smile on her face.

"You can't blame her for doing her job, Maki…"

"Uh, I can. Technically, she's trying to make me stop doing mine." Don't try to sound sensible with me, Yui, it doesn't work like that with you. "And it's not like I can just ask my current guardian for pocket money all willy-nilly. A guy gotta earn his keep."

"Hmm… I guess." I'm surprised you even know that idiom. "But I think that it isn't good if it, like, distracts you from school. I-I know that you're smart and all, Maki, but attendance is still important you know!"

"Of course, I know." I let out a low sigh, resting my head even deeper into my desk. How's that possible, don't even ask. "It's just… I can't keep on bothering her that way, you know? I don't want to inconvenience her even more."

"Her…?" she does a thinking look, something I often see her making when she's worried about something. "Is Maki talking about his guardian?"

"Yeah." And don't refer to me in third person, it's not good for my heart.

"O-Oh." And don't pout, you're making it look like I just insulted you or something. "Say-"

Whatever Yui is planning to say, I'm not allowed to hear it because the door to the classroom is suddenly opened with a force so strong that a loud banging noise is heard, effectively shutting everyone up and drawing all of our attention. Naturally, both Yui and I are not exceptions. We both turn our attention to the doorway, wondering what in god's green earth just happened.

"Is Uzumaki fucking Naruto in here?!"

...what?

Call them whatever you want. Punks, delinquents, troublemakers… deep down inside, they're all just a bunch of lost kids. The moment my name is uttered, every single one of my classmates' attention are turned towards me, lighting up my presence like a beacon in the dark cold night. Raising an eyebrow, I don't bother hiding my confusion.

That's because I am genuinely confused. What the hell's going on?

The rough, ear grueling sound of the school's indoor shoes' stomping on the classroom's floor, an action I assume that is trying to replicate a march, draws any student within my vicinity away like the red sea when it was split open by some old dude back in the day.

"Maki…!" Yui's hushed whisper is a sign that she's at least at a safe distance from whatever fallout that is about to happen.

Good. That means I won't have to worry about accidentally hurting her should things come to worse.

...but hopefully, it won't.

Intimidating isn't the word I'll use to describe my… err… guest? Yes, guest. He is, after all, here for me. And he's in my classroom too, my sovereignty. Average height, average build… aside from the purposefully 'messy' attire he's sporting, everything about him is average.

Even the expression of anger on his face isn't worth noting.

Yet here he is, stealing all the limelight and attention of all my classmates. Everyone is forming a circle around the two of us, as if subconsciously hoping that a gladiator style fight will break out or something. All buttons on his shirt aren't fixed, the blazer's intentionally left open to show whatever it is he is hoping to show underneath and his hair is so greasy you can still extract the oil from it and use it to light up a torch.

All in all, he fit the Japanese high school delinquent jock archetype to a fucking tee.

You can say that he is a counterpart of my archetype in school.

...and also to someone else.

"Heh, so you're the punk Ayaka's been screwing, huh?" He lets out conceited scoff. "Nothin' but a pretty boy to me."

Well this pretty boy is clearly something to this 'Ayaka' of yours… of course, I'm not gonna say that. But I will say one thing.

"Sorry bub, I don't know any Ayakas."

"Hah?" Oh, god, this is going to get pretty. "Don't fucking bullshit with me, Uzumaki!" Ergh, don't shout too close to me, you'll get spit on my face!

It's getting even more obvious that this guy isn't here just to talk. The other students are also beginning to get on edge from the visible show of aggression he is showing. I don't like this kind of attention. Especially not from my own classmates.

Naturally, this sudden burst of aggression from him prompts him to not only shout verbally, but also act directly. With both of his hands, he has my collar on a grip. He manages to pull me up to stand, but it still feels a tad weird since I'm at least a head taller than him.

I hear gasps and mutters escaping from my classmates' lips, the peanut gallery unable to contain their voices while watching the scene unfolds.

"Oi, oi, don't pull too hard on the collar! This one's the only clean set I got this week!" Lipstick and wine stains are very hard to clean, you know?

"Heh, I have enough of your fucking attitude you fuck boy."

Fuck boy?! Hey, unlike those pricks I do actually get laid!

"Let's see if you're as tough as they say, blondie." With his right arm raised and palms balled into a fist, he makes his intent clear.

"Oi." I mutter, raising one hand up.

"Hah? What, you gonna fight back?"

"Just not the face."

"What?"

Are you deaf or something kid? "I said not the face." I scoff, looking sideways. "I have a job tonight." And I don't need something like a black eye to-

 **WHAM**

Gasps erupted from the surrounding onlookers.

I swear I hear camera snapshots going off, but silence quickly reestablishes itself inside the room. Not even our resident mister 'nice guy' is brave enough to step in.

It's… strange.

It's not every day I get punched on the face, fortunately. The last time I recall that happening is several decades ago, way before I decide to join the Japanese society. And even then, I haven't been in any situation that can be formally classified as an assault. Although it might seem unbelievable, I try to avoid trouble and the unnecessary hindrances that comes along with it… but unfortunately, it's not always possible.

The stinging sensation is quick to leave, but that is to be expected from a poorly executed punch. He used the back of his fingers to connect the punch and since it creates a large surface area, the impact is equally distributed, making it hurt less. If he used his knuckles, then maybe. Maybe it would've hurt.

...but, regardless, he ignored what I just said.

Whipping my face back, I look at him square in the eyes. He looks satisfied, proud even, with a dirty smirk plastered on that ugly mug of his.

Huh…? Weird, I'm tasting blood.

I should have my dentist file my teeth.

But thankfully, no sign of physical damage. I'll be surprised if there is. But, forget that, this guy's just messed up big time.

"Aw what's wrong, did that hurt? Huh? You want to go home and cry, huh? You sad now, huh?!"

To the people who said 'patience is a virtue'... obviously, you motherfuckers are touched in the head.

"Oi." I call out, a voice too deep to be mine leaks out of my mouth. I'm not exactly sure what kind of expression I'm making at the moment, but whatever it is, it makes him drop the hold he has on me earlier.

The guy takes several steps back, clearly stunned, but still maintains that pathetic look on his face. It makes him all the more punchable, if I'm to be honest.

Raising my hand, I let my fingers caress my cheek. The place he hit, to be more precise. Again, it was not exactly painful. It barely hurt, honestly, the only reason it's annoying is because of the cut my tooth makes when it comes in contact with the inner walls of my mouth. With a quick gulp, I swallow the combination of spit and blood into my system. Ain't no way I'm letting this fucker see me bleed.

Crossing my arms, I level him a glare, my eyebrows creasing to intensify the action. "Didn't I tell you before? Not. the. face."

"O-Oh yeah? What're you gonna do about it, huh, punk?!"

...they just don't learn, do they?

"Huh?!" He sneers, lips twisting to form a punch-worthy expression. "What are you gonna do?"

It seems that my lack of action to his provocation has only served to pointlessly increase his false bravado. Expected, but still a dumb thing to feel. Unable to hold back the itch my left hand is feeling, I do what any normal person will do at this situation.

"Oi." My eyes scream at him. "I'll give you three counts to leave this room."

"What?" Is this prick retarded or something?

"One."

Ever since I've lost my ability to use chakra, I have to always remind myself that I can't just crash into trouble headfirst with a Rasengan in my right hand expecting that it'll be solved just like in the good ol' days. Now, I have to resort to less quicker methods, but the one I prefer anyway. Talking.

Now, obviously here, talking won't work with the stubborn brick-for-brains in front of me. I guess a punch to the jaw will set things straight and make things super satisfying for me, but I don't wanna fourth period like this.

What can I say, we're going to have Biology, and I love Biology.

"Two."

And speaking of Biology, my knowledge of the human body, when it is being subjected to extreme amounts of pain and punishment, is far greater than anyone in this classroom combined. And I can just subject the boy in front of me to the so called extreme amounts of pain and punishment I'm talking about.

But for now, I'll settle on messing with him.

" **Three."**

My head shoots forward, like a goalkeeper performing a defensive heading maneuver to prevent a ball from entering the goal. Due to the very short vicinity I have between this less-than-fine gentleman in front of me, I have to stop in a split second in order to not - as tempting as it sounds - subject the prick to the most awesome and painful headbutt that he could have received in his life.

This sudden move from me not only startles the pathetic piece of dump in front of me, but also the onlookers. The punk reels back, startled, and falls to the floor; landing butt first and back later. However, I have no plans on stopping here. Stepping out of my seat, I walk over him, literally. Stopping when I'm standing just above his waistline, I look down, craning my neck in a way that it's clear that I am looking down at him both in the literal sense and the metaphorical sense.

The look on his face is oh so priceless right now.

No, honestly, I've never seen someone scared shit-less in a very long time that it's starting to bring out my sadistic tendencies that I have unconsciously developed through years of carnal abuse.

...god I need help.

Seeing the kind of face this poor boy is making snaps me back to reality. I can now clearly hear the panicked mutterings of my classmates and smell the fear in the air. Slowly turning my head, I see a sight that makes my heart clench.

...god freaking dammit.

Sighing, I let my shoulders slump. Glancing downwards, the kid's entire body flinches as if the mere action of me looking at him carries weight.

"D-Don't! S-Stay back!" Gone is smug asshole whose face I want to punch, replaced by a pathetic wimp of a kid who looks like he's just about to shit his pants.

"...tch!" I kick myself off him, letting the scamp crawl away from his earlier position. Looking into his eyes, it seems that I've struck fear more than a smithy struck iron.

I send him one last glare. "Scram."

That is the only magic word I need to get him scurrying off the ground and towards the door, the sound of his frightened footsteps echo the halls and back. Sighing, I wipe my forehead with my sleeve. That could've gotten messy, I'm thankful it didn't.

"Maki are you okay?" Immediately, Yui rushes through the crowding students to me. She is obviously referring to the punch that was laid on me earlier. "Did it hurt?"

"I'm fine." I say to her, slowly making my way back to my seat with her following me. "It didn't hurt, but it did cut the inside of my mouth."

"Oh gosh, are you bleeding? Do you need to go to the nurse? I'll take you-"

"I'm fine, Yui." God, you can be a worrywart. The last time she's like this is when she's studying for that make up test she had to take because she failed her first one. Now that one is far more justifiable than something like this.

Speaking of which… this girl has to study more. Her score's been lagging behind if I recall correctly.

I tap my cheek, right where I was punched earlier. "See? It doesn't hurt." I convince her off her worries. "It'll take more than that to hurt someone as awesome as me."

Fufufu!

"Maki…" Yui doesn't look convinced, though… "Just… don't get into anymore fights, okay? What if you get hurt? If… If you got hurt, I-I'll…!"

"Hey."

"Eh?"

Putting a hand on her head, I give it several light taps. "Don't sweat it, but I can't promise you anything about getting into fights, though."

"W-Why?"

"Because, Yui, we all fight." I say, in the corniest and cheesiest movie theatre main character voice I can muster. "One way or another." Then, I give her a wink.

"O-Oh…" it seems that she's okay with that answer, strangely. "Okay then… if you say so." Good. Seems like we can all drop this whole event and go on with our lives. "But I'm glad that you didn't fight, Maki."

"Hm, why?" I can't let her know that I was _thiiiiis_ close from bashing that punk's head in.

"I dunno." She giggles, leaning forward with her hands behind her. Reminds me of a certain girl from my old school's debate club. "I just am!"

"Airhead." I say, chuckling.

For the remainder of recess, everything more or less returns to the way it was before. The only one who's brave enough to approach me is Yui, but that's a given since I'm not that close with most of my classmates; only a few of them. Being friends with me give people mixed feelings in a certain kind of way, simply because of the unconfirmed allegations regarding my promiscuity.

At least unconfirmed to them.

I'm mostly open to the people who approach me, but comparing it to the way I was a long time ago, it is hard for me to let a person within my comfort zone.

Which is why I treasure whatever relation I have now dearly.

* * *

"Hm? What are you two doing out here looking more suspicious than a twelve year old boy at the adult's section of a comic book store?"

It's very hard to not call what they're doing as suspicious, because it is in every way, shape and form. But what's confusing me is the necessity of it in the first place. Why on earth are these two girls creeping and peeping into the club room like a pair of peeping toms?

"Uzumaki-kun!" Yukinoshita reels back from her spot, probably the most surprised I've seen her look in the short time I've met her. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't surprise us like that!"

Rolling my eyes, I give Yukinoshita a look. "Sheesh, give me a break princess. It's not my fault you have the perception of a lobotomized patient." I ignore the dark look she gives me, instead focusing on the matter at hand. "So, why are you two acting all Sam Fisher-like in the halls for anyway?"

"Who's Sam Fisher?"

"Nothing." I cut down Yui's question quickly, much to her annoyance. I guess Solid Snake would've made for an easier comparison, huh?

"There is someone inside the club room." Yukinoshita, being the only one with her attention fixed to the problem, tells me in a hushed whisper. "A suspicious individual wearing a trench coat."

Wait, did you just say…

"What on earth would one wear a trench coat for? Summer is approaching yet he is already dressed as if he's ready for autumn, strange…" Yukinoshita speaks to herself, trying to come up with a reason to her dilemma.

...trench coat, eh? Hmm… looks like I have an idea of who our mysterious intruder might be, if only I can just take a peek inside-yup, that confirms it, it's him.

Without any restraint or whatsoever, I slide the door open and step into the room, startling the two girls with my direct action.

"Maki!"

"Uzumaki-kun!"

Sorry ladies, but subtlety won't work with this guy here.

"Aha… it seems that you have finally arrived, my half blooded compadre."

You cannot get anymore B movie than that. He makes it sound like we're in a low budget Hollywood thriller flick or something.

"I've been waiting."

The trench coat is a dead giveaway, hell, the moment Yukinoshita said it, I know it's him. Why? Because there's no one else in Soubu who's dumb enough to wear a trench coat when it's like twenty degrees celsius outside. With his pot bellied build, thick rimmed rectangular eyeglasses and silver dyed hair tied to a ponytail, he still has the confidence to do a Jojo pose as he plays the part of an anticipating antagonist.

And why the hell are there so many papers scattered?!

"Our last meeting was cut short due to… inconveniences. I do hope you can forgive me for that." What the hell is he acting as cool and regretful for?

This is none other than Zaimokuza Yoshiteru. Soubu's resident delusional otaku and an aspiring light novel author. I'm using the term 'author' loosely here because the other word I'd use will only make him cry. Aside from his most of them time disgusting otaku nature, he's a pretty cool guy. Resourceful too.

"Zaimokuza, we had to cut our hang out short because your mom called you so she could take you to that therapy of yours for another one on one session." I say, my voice as flat as paper. "I know you're delusional, buddy, but you're not an idiot."

"D-D-Don't say that!" He whines, dropping the whole mysterious character act as he stomps his foot like a five year old who's been denied entry to Disneyland. "There are females here!"

Walking up to me, Yui can no longer hold back her curiosity. "Who's he, Maki? Is he your friend?"

To be honest, I can't just admit something like that so easily. Zaimokuza is… you know… Zaimokuza!

But he is an okay guy…

"A-Ano, Naruto-san… it seems that you're thinking about some pretty mean things about me…"

Sighing, I give Yui her long deserved answer. "I guess you can say that." Aaaand the light returns to Zaimokuza's face, as he retake his earlier persona.

"Umu! Indeed!"

With an arm on his chest, and another one on his forehead, it's amazing how he's not in some sort of drama club or something similar since he apparently has no shame or whatsoever.

"Me and that man over there have gone through countless trials together-"

"Homeworks. I occasionally help with his Language subject."

"-and endure the harsh, unforgiving world that we are forced to face every waking moment-"

"We hang out, sometimes. He's pretty good at those card games in the arcades nearby."

"-while suffering under the scrutiny of the uninitiated normies of society who are ignorant to Araki-sama's words!"

"We're both Jojo fans." I say with a hint of proud, nearly joining the currently zealous Zaimokuza. Hey, that's a nice alliteration.

"I… see." I can detect confusion in Yukinoshita's eyes, but the look that Yui's giving Zaimokuza is even more worth noting.

She's eyeing him as if he's a piece of discarded banana peel in the middle of a road; as someone who's totally out of place and a potential hazard.

Now no longer alarmed, Yukinoshita and Yui settles into the clubroom while Zaimokuza and I pick up the papers that are scattered all over the floor. Wait, why am I helping him anyway?

As per usual, tea is served along with a small assortment of biscuits handmade by our club president. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

"So, you are Zaimokuza Yoshiteru-kun, are you not?"

"..."

Both Yukinoshita and Yui waits for confirmation. But, unexpectedly, there is no answer coming from the guy. Turning towards my clubmates, I wiggle my finger to get their attention. "You see, Zaimokuza has this thing called _Y_."

"D-D-Don't just reveal my weakness to the enemies just like that, Naruto-san!" Cries the bespectacled trench coat wearing boy.

"Anxiety?" Yukinoshita tilts her head, reminiscent of a cat whose food bowl is empty despite it being full a few moments ago. "I fail to see how it's relevant. Is he perhaps looking forward to us helping him get over his anxiety?"

Yui chips in, eager to join conversation. Looking a little bit excited too. "Ooh! Ooh! This is, like, those kind'a development they have in movies! Where the main characters help the side character to improve themselves or whatever!"

"I-I'm not a side character!" Zaimokuza's yelling falls on deaf ears, sadly.

Leaning backwards on my chair, I shake my head. "I doubt it. When you're far down and deep into the creepy otaku lifestyle that he has, even something as trivial as greeting the cashier of a konbini is a major life achievement."

"T-That's true but that's still incredibly mean, Naruto-san!"

"Okay, then, Yoshiteru" I turn to the boy himself, calling him out using his first name, "what do you want?"

"Um… Umu!" He snaps back to character. What a fickle guy. "I have come requesting assistance! It is regarding these, you see." He pats the decent sized stack of papers that he and I collected earlier before.

I got a good look of some of them, I think I know where this is going.

"So, what is all this about?" Picking up one of the papers from the stack, Yukinoshita takes a brief second to analyze the thing.

"I have come requesting assistance. A rather personal one, you see."

"Oh, it seems that you are writing a story?" I think this is the first time I have ever heard Yukinoshita sound unsure. But that cannot be, she's a smart girl. Maybe Zaimokuza's writing is just that bad?

Rather than answering Yukinoshita's question, Zaimokuza looks away.

Naturally, this confuses her. Looking towards me, I sigh before proceeding to explain. "Social anxiety. Zaimokuza has anxiety." A brief explanation, but that should be enough.

"Regardless, he should at least be able to explain what it is that he wants us to assist him with, no?" Logical, but such is not the case this time. With a stern look on her face, Yukinoshita turns toward Zaimokuza. "So, Zaimokuza Yoshiteru-kun, am I right to assume that you are writing a story?"

It's tough for Zaimokuza. Despite all the shit I give him about being an otaku freak, he really does struggle with these kind of things. The guy's a loner and has few friends. Not that there's anything wrong with that, in fact, if he's fine with it, then there's no big deal. But I can tell that he really tries to overcome, sometimes. And that touches my heartstrings in a way.

Unlike a certain someone I know.

I swear… that person needs to learn a thing or two about empathy.

"Zaimokuza." I speak, causing him to look at me in response. "Just answer her."

Hopefully, this encouragement is enough for him to man up and face Yukinoshita.

Zaimokuza takes in a deep breath of air, releasing it shortly afterwards. Good. Looks like he finally pulls through.

"A story…" His voice may be small, but it's loud enough for the three of us to hear him. "I require assistance; meaning I need help to… look through… my ma-manuscript…" Throughout the explanation, he never meets eye with Yukinoshita.

Well, I can't blame him either way; our club president can be a scary person.

"A manuscript…" Yukinoshita returns her attention back to the papers, skimming through several of them quickly with keen eyes. Yui leans forward behind Yukinoshita, peeking through her shoulder so she can catch a glimpse of the paper.

"I-Indeed!" Anxiety or not, Zaimokuza never breaks character. "For I desire to be an author, a novel author that will inspire the burning passion in the hearts of brave men and fair ladies all over Japan with my works!"

As far as dream goes, Zaimokuza's isn't unreasonable.

But you shouldn't trust a guy whose lifetime dream was to bring peace into the world when it comes to what is and what isn't a reasonable dream. You'll hear nothing but hypocrisy from him.

"Hm." Picking up one of the papers from the stack, I begin skimming through the words. "Seems like you got everything planned out here."

"Oh yes! I have an entire volume's worth of draft printed out for reviewing!" Zaimokuza explains with glee, the gling of his eyes reflected on the surface of his specs.

"But…" This time, Yui finds her voice heard by us. "Isn't it easier to have people on the internet review it for you?" She says, cocking her head sideways. "Like, you can just post it on a blog website or something, right?"

I'm expecting Zaimokuza to be stuttering or not reply at all, but I'm surprised when he flares his nostrils while both hands are akimbo on his hips. He looks agitated, almost… offended in a way? It's interesting for me too since I rarely see him get ticked off by a comment from a stranger.

"And let the despicable keyboard trolls steal my wonderful, hard-worked ideas?! You're mad, knave!" He flares up in gusto, the passion overtaking his very being. "It would be foolish to upload personal and precious ideas into the internet these days!"

Suddenly, his persona drops again.

"A-And besides… I-I don't want to get flamed by people… so…"

"Then I'm afraid you've come to the wrong place, Yoshiteru." I say to the boy, using his last name. He turns to me for elaboration. "Between this place and some random internet forum, you'll find more solace and forgiveness in the wired world. At least over there, your pain is digital."

"W-What do you mean?" asks the trench coat wearing student.

"You'll find out sooner or later." I say to him before swivelling my head to look at Yukinoshita. "So, Yukinoshita, what say you?"

Our club president, who has been skimming through the papers Zaimokuza has brought for us to give our ideas on, finally raises her head to speak. From a glance, it's impossible to tell what she thinks about the work. To be fair, she barely scratches the surface of the content that Zaimokuza has, but she's the type of girl who renders all surface knowledge obsolete. Meaning that she has a clear grasp of what the 'novel' will be just from analyzing things like grammar, use of words, phrases and so on.

"This is… interesting."

Oh God, Zaimokuza, you're so dead.

"Maa, maa." I better step in here. I don't want Zaimokuza to die just yet. "Why don't we do it like this: we each print our own copy of the draft and read it at home?" Honestly, I can't think of a better suggestion than this.

But if princess over here has a better one, I won't be upset to hear it.

"Very well." It seems we're on the same wavelength for once. Yukinoshita places the papers on the stack, returning to spot afterwards. "We shall get a copy of your manuscript, Zaimokuza-kun. Uzumaki-kun, Yuigahama-san and I will give you our thoughts about it."

She turns her gaze towards Yui.

"Is that okay with you, Yuigahama-san?"

"Oh? Okay, it's totally fine!"

She says that, but I doubt that she's going to do that.

Now that we all come to an agreement, we decide that today's club activity is adjourned and we are free to return home.

"Finally…"

I never think high school will be tiresome… although, to be fair, it isn't the same kind of tiredness that you'll normally get from working. I still think that we did a lot today, me especially, with the whole charade inside the classroom today.

Thankfully, the rumor about that scene hasn't spread… yet. Maybe it just wasn't that interesting? Or maybe they were hoping for a fight? Well, either way, I'm just glad I didn't get in trouble.

The walk back home is always silent, barring the usual street ambiance. Today, in particular, is my quietest walk back home yet since not many clubs are having activities today. Even the normally active soccer club isn't present for any practice matches today. Looks like they're taking it easy.

Closing my eyes shut while pushing my temples with one of my fingers, I let out a long sigh. A day's worth of school has passed and I'm once again outside, roaming the streets. I always feel different whenever I step out or get out of school. It's like I'm living a double life. Instead, rather than being a superhero with a separate identity, I'm living the secret life of a male escort neck deep in vice and debauchery.

Oh I can only imagine the face Hiratsuka-sensei will make if this ever gets out in public.

But, regardless, it is what it is.

I have been doing this for quite some time, now. Around two-three years? Yeah. Third year of high school, first year of high school and now I'm in my second year… so yeah. I'm perfectly aware that a normal high school student should not be having this kind of double life, but I'll use the argument that I'm everything but normal.

And it's not like I hate doing this, either.

No, let me correct that. I know I don't hate doing this, nor do I regret stepping into this kind of career if you can call it that. The circumstances that landed me my current job was a bit unorthodox, so I can understand if it is unbelievable to some… but it did happen.

* * *

 _Third year of middle school, graduation._

 _If you asked a middle school boy what he wanted to be in the future, you would probably get vague and uncertain answers. And that would be perfectly normal, considering that he was nothing more than a kid. Not even in the peak of his teens._

 _Now ask the same question, but to an immortal former shinobi who used to fight mountain sized demons and god-like beings._

 _You'd probably get a different answer._

 _The air was warm. Sunny. It's that nice March sky and underneath it was an entire school's worth of students who had just finished their graduation ceremony. Dressed in their uniform, boys and girls gathered outside in the courtyard surrounded by fellow graduates and family, enjoying the last days of their year at whatever level of education they were in._

 _Amidst a sea of student, I stood alone._

 _With my graduation certificate sealed inside the small, black, cylindrical container, I certainly blended in with my surroundings to the miniscule of details. I mean, I was a student who had just had his graduation. I wasn't about to raise any suspicion at all._

" _Naruto-senpai!"_

 _Turning my head, I found myself facing a small troupe of underclassmen. Boys and girls who were a year or two 'younger' than me. I recognized all of them, I had to. These kids were some of the people I actually bothered to talk to during my entire period in middle school._

 _Their names…? Ah, that wasn't important… looks like they're about to say something._

" _N-Naruto-senpai!" One of the kids, a girl with long, straight black hair, stepped forward; a rectangular object within her hands. "H-Here! We made you this!"_

 _She shoved the thing she was holding into my hands, transferring ownership of the item to me. Pulling it off my chest, I examined the item. And, honestly, I would be lying if I say that my heart didn't melt a little bit._

 _It was an art piece, one of them was from the art club after all, and had words written all over it. A… portrait of my face, done so well to a point where it made me think I was looking at a mirror at first. There were things like 'Congratulations!' and 'Happy Graduation Senpai!' scribbled all over visible space for me to read._

 _Safe to say I couldn't help but shed a few tears._

" _Thank you, all of you." Wiping my damp eyelids, I let out a chorus of chuckles just to ease the kids in front. "Work hard all of you, okay?"_

" _S-Senpai…! Senpai!" A shorter girl rushed up to me and enveloped me in a tight, teary hug. This was soon joined by several more, while several hung back, observing with teary eyes._

 _It was heartwarming. I enjoyed it, if I had to be honest. I mean, how could I not? After a few exchange of words, hugs and promises, we separated and went our own ways. For me, it was in a more literal sense._

 _With my bag and basically everything I had with me inside of it, I left the school through the front gate. As I walked, people around me were still caught up in the mood. Best friends saying goodbyes and making promises to meet even in later years, parents congratulating their children for graduating and making it through middle school... and there were some who was just happy to graduate. Like me._

 _I walked towards the direction of my home, passing through a few blocks of houses making me a good distance away from school. From here, I could no longer hear the sound of teachers speaking through microphones or the damn school chime ringing every five minutes or so._

 _Pulling out the graduation form, I let out a few set of chuckles. It always amused me to no end, knowing that I had tons of certificates, diplomas and the sorts of many kinds that I had accumulated throughout the years. Let's see… I had one from Cambridge, Oxford, MIT… well, just those to name a few._

 _Now, I could add a Japanese middle school's graduation diploma to that list._

 _I didn't know what I'd do with them, so I always ended up disposing them every decade or so. Which meant I had to go and come up with several different aliases throughout my life._

 _It used to be easy, but in this day and age, I needed to be careful._

 _Raising the diploma to an eye level, I paid no mind to my surroundings even as I walked the streets. It should be fairly empty. After all, it was still graduation day._

 _Seeing my name written on the paper brought up a sense of numbness to me. I always thought to myself that I would end up repeating the same damn thing over, and over, and over again until god knows when._

 _Maybe there would be a time in the future where I'd finally snap again. Who knows?_

 _I'm fairly tempted to just rip off the diploma and scatter the pieces to the wind. It's not like I had not gone through a lifetime without ever going to school, although admittedly, it was never an option in today's society._

 _So, I settled with the next best alternative._

 _With one swift move, I crumpled up the paper into my fist, and tossed it to the road beside me._

 _I spared it not a single glance, opting instead to continue making my way home._

 _...if it were not for someone interrupting me…_

" _Oi."_

 _Naturally, my body stopped in place. Centuries long of accumulated rust on my senses had taken the ability to sense people within a heartbeat. With minor interest, I looked back, and what I saw was short of ordinary._

 _A woman._

 _Definitely a woman, but she lacked the air and feel of one. As far as looks went, she was definitely easy on the eyes; but nothing remarkable either. I would say that the first thing I noticed about her was her hair. It was an unnatural shade of green, almost like mop of raw uncooked kelp you could buy in the supermarket. But that did not meant it was unkempt, in fact, it was groomed well to the point where she would fit right in on a Pantene commercial._

 _Adding to that were her eyes. They seemed… for the lack of better words, dead. Like a zombie. No, that would be wrong. Her eyes were dull, grey and lifeless. Like a stale fish that had been sitting for far too long in the fishmonger's freezer. I was not sure if she was looking at me or through me, but_

 _She was dressed in your typical Office Lady attire. White buttoned top, black blazer, tight office skirt with matching color, and a pair of short work heels. The bag she was tutting over her right shoulder definitely gave her that prominent office lady look even more._

" _You dropped this."_

 _She was, of course, referring to the diploma which I had just crumpled and threw away earlier._

 _Ah… I have to admit, this felt embarrassing. I was not expecting anyone to see me do that._

 _The lady did not even wait for me to respond. Instead, she did the unthinkable. Walking towards me, she stopped a good meter away from me and proceeded to what the kids these days would call 'checking' me out. And that was what she did._

 _She literally just stood there, straight on her spot, while eyeing my very form from top to bottom. An old primal fear of being observed and analyzed by my enemies from back then started to resurface, this got me to act._

" _May I help you?" I asked her through closed teeth. I really didn't like our proximity._

 _She did not answer right away. She merely resumed what she was doing._

 _And just when I had enough of her lack of response, she finally spoke,_

" _Say, kid, how would you like to work as a host?"_

 _And that was how I got my job._

* * *

"You're here…?"

"Yup. Sorry for the sudden visit."

Smiling, I chuckled when I saw the face of the person who is currently greeting me. Opening the door, the owner of the house I'm currently intruding into is kind enough to let me inside, letting me take my shoes off and hang my blazer on the hanger just near the shoe rack.

As I stepped out of my shoes and into the pair of home slippers provided for me, I found my eyes glued to my host's back form.

I'll admit, being the type of person this person is, there isn't much to look at. Meaning that there is nothing physically attractive for me to look at… at least when it comes to the back side of things.

But the hair. That same kelp colored, seaweed looking hair… it has this certain charm to it, I guess. Or maybe I've just gotten used to seeing it.

"I'm gonna be in the living room. Just do whatever you want, there's food in the fridge."

"Okay. Hope you don't mind me borrowing your kitchen though, I don't want us to eat that slop you call food."

I snicker when I hear an irritated click of tongue from my comment. Indeed. Aside from my school bag, I am also carrying a plastic bag filled with ingredients. Nothing too extravagant, and it's just enough to feed us two.

Making my way out of the entrance hall and to the living room, I can't help but sigh.

"There you go again, slacking off in the living room with booze laying around. What'll your kid say if she sees this side of you, huh?"

A scoff. "She won't. After all, I'm careful enough to have you coming in and out of the house." A pause. "Anyway, what're you making?"

"Udon."

"Oh." Well that sounds underwhelming.

"Why, you don't like it?" Though I ask that, I'm already in the kitchen with the ingredients laid out and ready to be prepped.

"Nah. Just… surprising, that's all." A snort. "Who would've thought I'll end eating udon for dinner?"

I suppose that's true. But since it's only the two of us here, it's perfectly reasonable. Besides, most of the ingredients to make the broth for the udon are already available in here anyway. I literally only had to go buy the noodles itself from the market… alongside some other things. But we won't be using it for dinner.

"Just tell me when it's done."

"Okay." I reply, as I bring the soy sauce, mirin, salt, sugar and sake to a boil in a small pot.

Using instant soup broth will make things easier, but I personally like being able to adjust things like saltiness and sweetness levels as I cook. I know that she doesn't like sweet things, so we're going to have a more pronounced shoyu or soy sauce flavor.

Turning on the other stove, I put another pot to boil and cook the noodles there. Cooking the noodles and broth in the same pot will ruin the flavor as the starch from the wheat udon noodles will add bitterness to the broth. It doesn't take long for the noodles to finish cooking and once done, I turn off both stoves simultaneously.

Preparing two bowls on a serving tray, I ladle over the broth first into the bowls before evenly dividing the noodles into them. On a counter, I have a chopping board and knife prepared so that I could chop up some garnish for the dish.

Spring onions sliced to the thinnest, grated ginger and crushed garlic. Pretty bare bones, but this should be enough. I sprinkle the sliced spring onions on top of the udon, before neatly placing the grated ginger in the middle of the surface. The crushed garlic are placed on a small seasoning plate with soy sauce and sliced peppers. The soy sauce will be infused with the garlic and pepper taste, again, this is very common.

Once done, I put all the dirty utensils in the sink to clean later before bringing the tray of bowls to the table for serving. I also grab some eating utensils from the kitchen drawer; chopsticks and soup spoons.

"Food's ready, come."

I hear the sound of TV being turned off and footsteps pitter-pattering towards the dining table.

"Udon… huh? Looks pretty plain to me."

Geh… I know I should've bought some tempura or tofu skins!

"Sorry, I was rushing while I was shopping. Should I-"

"Nah, it's fine." Dragging a chair, she takes her seat while I serve the bowl in front of her. "It smells good."

I find myself smiling. "Thanks. It tastes good too, believe it." Grabbing a seat of my own, I plop myself down.

Uttering a small 'ittadakimasu', we dig into the meal in our own respective pace. I actually don't mind udon. While ramen is clearly superior, there is this feeling I get whenever I eat udon that is quite hard to express. It's sort of become a comfort food for me.

"Huh, it is good." Hearing the words leave her mouth causes me to smile as I slurp down strings of thick udon noodles into my belly.

"Thank you."

We resume our meal in silence, seeing as we are both already hungry to begin with. I'm hungry because I only ever eat bread and milk at school and she's hungry because she always skips lunch whenever she is at work, even when her colleagues invite her out for dinner afterwards. What worries me is that this has been going on for a while now, and for a normal human like her, it isn't healthy.

"So, how's work?" I find myself asking in the midst of our meal.

She is about to deposit more noodles and broth into her mouth, but finds herself pausing when asked. "It's been busy, honestly." She narrows her already intimidating looking eyes at me. "You should know, I'm in charge of you after all."

I chuckle. "Even after all the jobs I've done, you're still busy? I guess there's no end to lonely women in Japan, huh?"

She scoffs at my poor attempt at humor. "That and it's sort of your fault for being too popular. Clients are always requesting for you even when you're on a full schedule. Do something about it, will you?"

Ah, there it is. There is this childish side of her, a side I'm sure not even her family is aware of. She often complains about unreasonable things, like right now.

Frowning a little bit, I point at her with my wet chopsticks. "That's a bit unreasonable, don't you think? It's not my fault that I'm… err… okay, I legitimately sound like an ass right there." I quickly stop myself before I can make myself look like an asshole.

She let out a snort of amusement. "Heh. If it weren't for your looks, I would've been out of job years ago. I suppose I should thank you rather than berating you."

Shaking my head, I set down my utensils, having just finished my meal. "You really should, otherwise, you wouldn't have gotten that promotion."

Whatever trace of amusement is gone from her face, replaced by a half hearted sneer. "Yeah, yeah. Just bring these to the sink already."

Chuckling, I begin to do as instructed.

This is how our time spent together will usually start like, either with a meal or a conversation about work. She is in charge of me, as she's said, so talking about work in something unavoidable in our conversations. Washing the dishes and the earlier unwashed pots and bowls, I make quick work of them by using the sponge and soap with professional ease. I've lived long enough to know the quickest way of doing menial things like washing dishes and whatnot.

Rinsing my hands one last time, I grab a hold of a towel to dry them. Then I make my way towards the living room, where she's once again glued to the television, watching-

"Precure, huh?" I plop myself on the empty space of the couch next to her. She doesn't show any reaction to me doing this or whatsoever, meaning that she's totally fixated on the show.

"What? You're gonna judge me for my taste in anime now?" It seems that she's still salty about my earlier comment.

"No." I reply earnestly. "Though I give a friend of mine shit for watching anime, I'm kinda into them myself."

"Oh yeah? What kind?"

"Mostly the older stuffs." I answer casually.

"Like what?" she asks again.

"Hmm… I like the original Ghost in The Shell, the original Evangelion, Chobits and I'm still not over Cowboy Bebop." See you, space cowboy. "But there are some other newer stuffs that I enjoy, like, Madoka Magica but I just act like Rebellion never happened. Ever."

The woman sitting beside me snorts. "I can agree with you on that last one, but Madoka Magica? Out of all new-gen anime, why that one?"

I shrug my shoulders, my eyes taking in the sight of similarly styled magical girls fighting with their friendship power cranked up to the max on the screen.

"I don't know. I guess… some of the scenes there hits a little bit close to home?"

I can tell she's intrigued by what I just say. "How? It's a magical girl anime. Sure, it's not your typical magical girl anime and it has a questionable edgelord for a writer, but how does it 'hit a little bit close to home' exactly?"

Taking my eyes off the screen, I look towards her with a cheeky smile. "That's a secret. Maybe you'll find out, maybe you won't."

"Cheeky brat."

You're several centuries too young to be calling me a brat, Tanaka-san.

As we watch the magical girl show in silence, time does not wait for us and runs its course. It's getting pretty late, which brings me to thinking.

"Say, where's your kid anyway?"

"She called earlier today and say that she's staying over at a friend's house." She answers with a little bit of undertone in her voice, though I can't quite identify what it is. "She's old enough to be out there on her own."

She says that… but I know she's worried about her kid. She is a mother, after all.

A mother, huh?

I do not know what to say afterwards, so I keep my mouth shut. We continue to watch Precure until it eventually ends, showing the Blu-ray logo on the top left of the screen. Huh, looks like it's pre-recorded.

Stretching my arms upwards, I let out an unsuppressed yawn. In response to this, I am directed a rather crude look from my companion sitting next to me.

"So, tough day, huh?" She asks with a bit of snark.

Since we're technically just chilling right now with the TV on merely to serve as background noise, I let myself unwind. Loosening the tie around my neck, unbuttoning the first two buttons of my shirt as well as the cuffs; I lean back further into the couch's cushion, feeling my back sink into the softness.

"In a way." I respond, briefly. "But nothing compared to yours, I'll say."

Just by looking at her, one can tell that she has had another rough day at work. It's a wonder that she's even home at this hour, but that probably means she's spent an all nighter the other night getting things done. Her state of dress speaks for itself.

Like mine, she is pretty much still in 'uniform'. As in her work clothes. The white collared shirt lacks the jet black blazer that usually accompanies it, with the sleeves rolled up showing her pale, thin arms. She has ditched her stockings, leaving her feet bare and skin visible; but the uncomfortably tight skirt remains, looks like she can't be bothered removing it.

I feel the weight of the couch shift beside me, prompting a reaction from me. Then, I feel the weight being transferred directly on top of my lap, accompanied by the warmth coming straight from the source of the weight.

"..."

Wordlessly, I lock eyes with her.

I've said it many times. Her eyes look dull, lifeless. But that doesn't mean that they aren't attractive.

Leaning towards the side of my head, to my right ear, before letting her breathy voice ring through my ear canals.

" _Oh you have no idea."_

I feel her weight shift again, this time with both legs occupying my lap, she is basically sitting seiza style on my lap. Her bare arms find themselves wrapped around my neck, pulling it forward so that my forehead touches with hers. In this newfound position, my entire senses are rendered numb. They can only focus on one thing only.

Her.

My eyes are trapped in her cloudy ones, the breathing coming out of her nose and mouth tickles my facial area. With her face casted by the shadow from the light blocked by the back of her head, she looks down on me, looking ready to seize me up at any given moment.

But despite all of this development, I remain calm. I'll be lying if I say I'm scared or nervous from something like this. I'm not. This is… normal for someone like me, considering my job. Sure, it is questionable considering our relationship as manager and employee, but who gives a damn?

After a few moments of silence, I finally speak. "Are you sure you wanna do this?"

The look of restrained hunger she has before slips off, replaced by an annoyed expression. "Do you even have to ask?"

I shrug. "Hey, you can never be too careful nowadays."

She rolls her eyes.

"Just shut up and take it like a man."

I resist the urge to laugh. I mean can you blame me? It's not every day she's this eager.

After what seems to be an eternity of inaction, my hands spring to life. I feel her flinch at the slightest touch, but it is something she quickly gets used to. Both of my hands are placed on two different parts of her body, roaming the areas while simultaneously eliciting pleasant responses from her. Cupping her skirt covered rear with my right hand, she doesn't seem to mind the occasional light slaps I give. In fact, with every slap, she lets out a whimper and her whole body shivers in excitement.

While my right hand is busy with things in the back, my left hand is handling things down below. It caresses the lengths, width and volume of her left thigh. Her skirt has been conveniently skirted up to allow access for my left hand to do just that. Her pale, supple skin, smooth and cold to the touch, provides for a rather electrifying contrast to my rough, calloused hands. She shivers with every motion I do, trailing up and down her thigh, stopping ever so constantly so that I can focus more on touching rather than rubbing.

Of course, while this is happening, our upstairs section is busy as well.

Lips combined, mucous exchanged, teeth clashing and tongues intertwined. It is a messy battle that we intend to win, none of us are willing to back down, drunk in both lust and our respective form stubbornness and also unwillingness to back down. She sucks and bite, while I lick and graze. We both work with our own set of tools and respective skills from experiences.

And just because of that last point alone, I'm already winning this battle.

"...hah… hah…" See? She's already gasping for air, breathless and winded. Me? I'm barely sweating.

Seeing her like this makes me feel annoyed for some reason. "Should I take the lead?"

Upon hearing my suggestion, she looks unsure. She turns her head away, eyes no longer meeting mine. "...fine."

That is all I need to hear.

Letting go of her thigh, I cup her chin using my left hand and pulls her in for a deep kiss. Her body tenses the moment our lips make contact, it looks like she isn't expecting something as straightforward as that. But as quickly as snow melts, she eases into the action and lets me have full reign. With our lips still locked on each other, her hands move from hugging my neck and begin working to make quick work at undoing my buttons.

With my superior strength and weight, I lift her up from the couch and into the nearby wall, pinning her while she crosses her legs, locking them around my waist so that she can hold on to me. Once I feel that my shirt is no longer buttoned, I press my chest against her to the point where I'm basically pushing her against the wall while my hands pin hers up above her head to the wall behind her.

I move my head away, parting away from the kiss, leaving behind a trail of saliva after our exchange. She's huffing and panting. Her normally pale face is flushed from all the blood rushing to her face. Her seemingly lifeless eyes have developed a lustful glint that even I'm sure her husband doesn't know she can make.

"...huff… huff… w-what's… hah… next…?" Even when she's clearly tired and exhausted, she still has that sass in her.

I'll admit that it excites me seeing her acting all tough and controlling despite being at the short end of things. Wincing, she struggles to move but with the amount of force I'm applying to keep her pinned on the wall, she isn't about to do that soon. Letting go of her arms, she wraps them around my neck again to strengthen her hold on me. Our lips come crashing once again, this time with me overpowering her due to her less than mobile state.

"Your shirt." I ask, pausing from our current action.

"Just… rip it off I don't-mmmphf!"

Not letting her finish, I shut her off with a deeper kiss than the previous one while my hands are quick to work on her shirt. With the correct amount of strength, I rip the buttons off her shirt in one swift motion, revealing what's underneath. An adult she may be, but her proportions isn't what one would normally expect. Shapely as they may be, their size is nothing short of ordinary; maybe even putting her on the slender side. Covered by a pair of velvety black and frilly bra, she prefers them with the hook in front, which makes my job of unfastening them easier.

Our combined saliva and mouth juices leak from our lips every time we part to take in air. My senses are invaded by her scent and perfume, causing me to get into the mood more and more. And by that I mean it's getting me even more aroused.

"...you're already raring to go, huh champ?" She says breathlessly as she takes a peek below.

Looking down myself, I find it a little bit embarrassing. "Sorry. I guess I'm more tired than I expect."

Giving me one of her rare smiles, she leans forward with her lips opened and teeth showing. I wince when she bites down my lower lip, gnawing on it like a baby with her chew toy. With a flick of my finger, I unhook her bra from her, taking off her shirt and then throw it somewhere to the side of the living room for us to take care of later.

"Let's get back to the couch." She whispers to my ear. "I can't…"

Again, I don't let her finish. Still carrying her, I return to the couch, back to our previous position with her sitting on top of me and facing me. This time, we take our time to enjoy each other even more. Kissing, sucking, licking, you name it. I occasionally bite down her earlobe, eliciting a low growl from the back of her throat while she finds biting my lips and twisting my tongue with hers a new form of entertainment.

With our bare chest touching and rubbing against each other, with each motion we make, she lets out moans whenever her two soft nubs rubs against my skin. Both of my hands are busy groping away on her buttocks, giving them light squeezes and spanks. I then move to her hips, tracing up and down her lithe form before lifting her up, surprising her.

"W-What are you-HNNNNNNGHH!"

Using my teeth, I rip open her panties from underneath her skirt. The piece of soft, cotton fabric slides down her legs with the aid of my teeth. The action causes her to tense up and let out a restrained gasp. The musky scent of her female odor hits my nose and olfactory senses. She is standing on my lap, her height's just barely enough for me to be within her crotch's level.

Looking up, I'm greeted by a sight that I don't often see.

Her face is flushed to the back of her ears and down her neck, mouth constantly closing and opening, gasping for air and from the intense pleasure of being teased. If I'm not turned on earlier, then I'm sure as hell turned on now. Lifting her down back to my lap, she practically collapses into me, her head resting on my shoulders as her smaller body frame heaves and pants from the micro orgasm she just experienced.

I barely even touched her, what the fuck?

"I barely even touched you. Are you that eager?"

"S-So what?" She huffs, shooting me a glare. "Just take me already… oh god!"

She lets out a throaty moan when I grind my pelvis to her bare crotch. Mind you, she is the one who is without any garment underneath, so I can't blame her for moaning like that. For a while, I'm sure I feel something damp staining my pants. I do a double check and confirmed that it isn't from me.

Looking at her with a semi-incredulous expression, I can't help but be amazed. "Just from that?"

"S-Shut… up!"

With a lunge she assaults my lips, sloppily intruding herself into my mouth as she uses whatever miniscule amount of strength left in her body to unfasten the belt securing my pants. Being a woman with experience, it doesn't take too long for her to unfasten the accessory. Parting from our lip lock with a sharp gasp, she looks down, a creepy smile forming on her face.

"L-Looks like I'm not the only one excited."

She says that, but look who's shivering. But she is right though, I guess it's about time for me to have some piece of the fun.

Putting my arms underneath her armpits, she lets out a yelp when I lift her up to the air while I stand on my feet. She is now being held in the air by my arms, her feet levitating above the ground.

"O-Oi, what are you-mmmmph!" I pull her head down with my hand at the back of her neck as a way to make it possible, engaging us in an awkward and rather uncomfortable position to lip lock. She pulls back, gasping. "Let me down, I can't-"

I do exactly just that. I let her down. But this time, I drop her right on the couch.

"God! Ouch… what…"

The words die the moment they roll off the tip of her tongue. My body towers over her smaller form, while my right hand slowly pulls down my underwear. Her eyes widen and I can hear her swallowing her own saliva audibly. I feel a sense of freedom and relief after all that restriction being applied to my nether region, it's almost euphoric in a way.

"...holy shit." That's about the only thing she can say at the moment.

Keeping quiet, I give her time to process everything. Although she looks surprised, the constant shifting of position and her own fingers buried deep into her pelvic area are enough evidence for me to keep on doing what I intend to do.

"Now I know why they keep on requesting for you." Her low murmur does not go unheard of. Her flushed face struggles to keep a straight look, flicking her gaze away every now and then.

"Hope I didn't scare you." I say, my voice heavy from all the kissing we've done.

"If I was younger… maybe."

Sucking in air through my teeth, I almost let out a gasp when I feel her cold palm wrapped around my member. Her palm isn't big enough to grasp the whole girth, but that just means she's applying more pressure into grasping.

"It's a good thing we don't allow you to mess around with girls from your school, they might as well faint when they see something like this about to enter them."

Normally, I'll be flattered, but right now, she's pumping her hand up and down my entire length in such a way that it's been keeping my mind occupied.

"And just look at the tip… how the hell did it fit in me all those times, huh?"

"Well," I grunt. "To be fair to you, you always leaked so much down there. And every time we reach the two minute mark, you'd faint yourself."

That get under her skin, it seems. "S-Shut up!"

In a fit of combined anger and embarrassment, she begins her new form of assault by ramming her cute little mouth straight to the base of my member. My eyes go wide at the suddenness of the action, this time a sharp gasp escape my mouth.

"Oh… shit." I gasp. I can feel her throat wrapping around my son. The sensation of her inner throat tickling my most sensitive spots, and the hotness of her flesh warming it up making the action all the more…

...orgasmic.

But I'm not down for the count just yet. Far from it, in fact.

Gripping the back of her head, I gather up her hair into one bundle, pulling on it essentially. I can feel her throat expanding as it begins to take the form of my entire girth and length. It takes everything in me to not just begin thrusting my hips in and out of her mouth like some sort of dog in heat. I let her get used to it, encouraging her to take calm and shallow breaths from her nose rather than her mouth; otherwise she'll choke even more.

Saliva drips down the crevice of her mouth and into the couch's cushion. Thank god it's leather.

"Fuck… Tanaka-san…" I groan out, unable to hold my voice back. She tries to reply to my call, causing a pleasurable reaction since her throat is basically stuffed with my dick. The vibration her throat makes every time she moans is making the sensation even more unbearable.

Deciding enough is enough, I finally give in.

Pulling her hair back, I pull out of her throat, causing her to let out a sharp gasp after minutes of being unable to stretch her jaw muscle. But I don't intend on letting her rest just yet. So the moment I'm out, I thrust it back inside of her, covering my member in the pleasurable sensation once again. At this point, it's rinse and repeat. I begin thrusting in and out of her oral orifice with the intensity of a piston.

All throughout this entire process, her teary eyes meet mine as we lock eyes conveying our yearning, our need, for each others' presence.

I can tell that her jaw must be sore, I mean, how can it not be? It's a good thing that I'm so close to releasing. With both of my hand gripping the side of her head, there is no verbal warning from me as I thrust into the deepest and innermost part of her mouth and then releasing an entire load into the back of her throat, straight down to her gullet and into her stomach.

She gags and gasps. Whatever amount she cannot contain and swallow quick enough, spills from the corners of her mouth. A pleasurable sensation envelopes my entire being, causing several of my muscles to tense up. I haven't feel the need to stop releasing my load and a whole minute has passed.

Eventually, I'm spent for my first load and I pull out of her mouth slowly.

She coughs and gags from having her throat filled to the brim with sticky white liquid. I watch as she uses her hands to catch the cum dripping down her chin. The sight alone is enough to fuel my arousal again, thus explaining why I'm raring to go once again.

"W-Wow… koff… koff… haaah…" She glances upwards, teary eyes and all. "You're a fucking beast. A caveman in heat."

Deja Vu.

Rather than biting to her bait, I occupy the seat next to hers and ask, "Have enough yet?"

"Hell no." She sharply replies. "You can't just expect to release your gunk inside my throat and not go all the way."

After saying that, she straddles me once again, this time there is nothing separating our privates from each other. I can feel dripping, warm liquid making contact with my own sperm and saliva covered member. That look of pure hunger returns to her, whatever fazes her earlier has long since disappear.

"Then… do it." I say. Leaning my head back into the cushion, I cross my hands behind my back while thrusting my hips forward slightly to prod her entrance with the tip of my member. "You want it, you move it."

I see her bite her ow lower lip, hesitation crossing her face. But, nevertheless, she sinks herself into pleasure, allowing herself to descend and my member inside of her.

"Hnnnngh!"

Her body tenses immediately, and I can feel her inner walls spasming. Her body begin to shake and shiver, like an epileptic patient going through seizure. It worries me for a while, but after several seconds of going through her premature orgasm, she faints.

Raising an eyebrow, I can only say one thing.

"...fuck."

And I'm not even close to cumming.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ya'll the best. Honestly.**

 **And shoutout to those of you who jacked off on the previous chapter's lemon scene.**

* * *

"Honestly, this has got to stop."

I gurgle the spicy, minty menthol mouthwash in my mouth before spitting the content outside the bedroom window. With crusts still covering my eyes, the sun couldn't have picked a better time to rise. Am I being unreasonable? Maybe. But do I care? Hell no.

I turn around to look, my brain processing a reply to the statement she has just said.

"...some things are easier said than done, you know that right?" I ask her back, taking a seat on the window frame which is just big enough to almost fit my body. "And it's not like it's the first time you've said this. What about the first six or so times, huh? You forgot about those?"

Seeing the way her normally pale skin turning bright red in a matter of seconds quickly brushes off the sleepiness from my head. It's one hell of a sight for an early morning like this. Hell, this entire scene is one hell of a sight. The both of us shirtless, me half naked while she's still pretty much bare underneath the sheets, and our clothes are nowhere in sight.

Speaking of clothes…

"Damn, I forgot about our clothes." Panic surges through me, causing me to jump off the window frame. "When will your kid be back?"

"Don't worry." She says, lazily, waving one of her slender hands in a 'never mind' gesture. "She'll directly make her way to school from her friends' house; just pick your clothes up later."

That gets me to calm down. Leaning against the bedroom wall, I let out long sigh.

Observing her, she still makes no effort on getting out of bed. It's the usual, she's never been a morning person, but a very active night owl. Doesn't help the fact that she practically lives off coffee. Still tucked underneath the sheets, she winces and grunts from every minor movements she makes.

"Hey." Walking towards the bed, I take a seat on an empty spot. "Was I too rough yesterday?"

"Yes."

"Whoa, not holding out on me or whatsoever, huh?"

She levels me a semi-serious glare, using the sheets to cover up her bare upper area.

Which is something as useful as carrying water with a bucket full of holes.

"Look, in my defense, I was gonna stop when you fainted. But you wouldn't let go." The blush returns to her face. "So, I had to carry you to your room like so." I begin making gestures with my hands and hips, replicating the position in which she was stuck with me the other day.

"O-Okay already, fine, goddammit, you don't have to remind me about it." She mumbles, threatening to throw her pillow at me. But again, she is showing signs of coping with pain. Wincing every now and then while her body flinches every time she moves.

"Are you okay?" This time, the concern is clearly evident in my voice.

"I'm fine." She says, this time a lot more reassuring than previously. "It's just… we haven't been doing…" she slowly turns her face away from my general direction. Is she shy? "... _it_ often lately…"

"Oh." I mouthed. "Well. Errm. Uh." Goddammit, what am I supposed to say? 'Sorry that we haven't been screwing; been busy with screwing other girls, you know?' or 'Sorry for screwing you so hard last night?' Like hell!

God… sometimes, I really do think I should draw a line when it comes to things like this. Nope, should'a make things clearer, I've drawn lines. Multiple lines, in fact. Just gotta add 'don't have sexual affairs with your manager' into the pile. Do I feel guilty? Only a little bit. I guess years and years and years of living have desensitized me to a point where I only feel a minimal amount of guilt for having an affair with someone else's wife.

Yes, I am fully aware of how fucked up that might have sounded, but it is what it is.

But it's… complicated, especially since she doesn't know a single thing about my condition and situation. Like everyone else, she knows me only as a high school kid who she scouted back when he was a middle school graduate. Now, she's having an affair with said kid, not knowing that he's an old man cursed with immortality. Most of the guilt I'm feeling comes from here. It feels like I'm deceiving her and even after all this time, I still can't get used to it.

Then again, she isn't the first… and won't necessarily be the last.

"So, uh, can you go to work today?" I ask, scratching the back of my neck.

"I'll have to." She mumbles. "You have some important clients tonight, and I have to sort things out regarding the time."

In the end, it all boils down to me, huh? "Look, you know that you don't have to force yourself, right?" I ask her, crossing my arms.

"We can't afford to lose these VIPs, kid." She argues, finally making the effort to look at me once again. "With how poorly the other managers and their charge are performing, your one of our top breadwinners."

I blink. "Then it's clearly their fault for not being competent enough to manage their charge. It doesn't mean that they have to work you to the bones for it."

"Sometimes, sure." She's trying to reason with me, it seems. "But most of the times, it isn't the case."

Getting off her bed, she discards the sheets and lean over to pick up her phone. Modesty and shame be damned. While I'm not complaining about the view, I'm more curious as to what she's about to show and say to me. I see her picking her phone from the nightstand next to the bed, unlocking the screen to show me a display chart of some sort.

"Look at the figures carefully." Her voice takes on a serious tone, she's channeling her inner manager side it seems. "That's how much money we're making this month alone."

I'm seeing the figures and I can say that I'm impressed. While they don't exactly disclose information like this to us who do all the dirty work, Tanaka-san has been kind enough to share with me a few times. We're certainly doing better when compared to last month's, and by a large margin too. But what's this other graph here?

Tanaka-san must've noticed what I'm looking at, because she says this, "Now, that other graph, is this month's projected income without you in the equation."

W-Whoa.

I'll have to admit, even I'm overwhelmed. Do… do they really charge VIP clients that much? I mean, sure, based on the pay I'm getting, it ain't exactly something someone can decide at the back of their head… but the figures speak for itself, the difference between the two figures is noticeable.

Handing her the phone back, I let out bated breath. "Wow. I don't know what to say after seeing that."

Tanaka-san lets out a snort of amusement upon seeing my reaction. She always finds the strangest things funny. "Now you know why the higher ups are always giving me an earful whenever we have clients cancelling on us."

"Yeah, now I know." I chuckle. "But I'm serious. Don't overwork yourself. I know I'm the last person you should be hearing that from, but just… just don't, okay?"

"...fine."

Smiling, I stand up from the bed and begin stretching my hands up in the air.

Today's a fresh morning, but it isn't fresh enough to guarantee me a safe entry to class without getting punched by Hiratsuka-sensei's fist.

Yes, that's just a very long way of saying I'm late. And fucked.

* * *

Shivering lightly, I pull on the collar of my tracksuit to shield my neck from the nipping cold air. It's already bad enough that the duty teacher for tardy students is that hardass Yamazaki-sensei from Physics class, now I have to sweat outside in the cold. Though it might sound like complaining, I'm only complaining about the first half.

We're having P.E early in the morning. As per usual, boys and girls are divided, same old, same old. The girls get the long end of the stick and get to hog the entire gymnasium all for themselves, away from the cold outside air. There's a reason for this, of course. The girls are currently having volleyball inside, while we're outside practicing tennis.

And by 'practicing' I mean 'practicing'. It's not like training, which implies a subtext of the need to prepare, but merely… playing around with a tennis racket and ball as a part of our physical activity. Yeah, Soubu is quite lax when it comes to P.E… strange though, because from what I've heard, our soccer team's one of the best in the area.

Sighing, I dribble the bright green-yellow tennis ball on the far end of the court. As one can see, I'm standing all the way here on the corner all by myself. Oh, I don't mind being alone, in fact, I'll admit that I kind'a prefer it time to time.

But just because I'm alone, doesn't mean that I'm not practicing my… uh… what's the term, swings? Is that it? Yeah, that's it.

Using the wall as an imaginary practicing partner, I begin 'playing' against it in a somewhat relaxed pace. I mean I'm not exactly putting effort into my swings, so I can't say that I'm into it either. Somewhere nearby, I can hear Zaimokuza's voice wheezing as he attempts to poorly replicate what I'm doing.

He really ought to ditch that coat…

"Yo, that shot was so sick bro! You totes gotta teach me that!"

"Nah, it was nothing. I just smash it the right way!"

Hehe, smash it the right way. Smash. God, I can be such a kid sometimes.

And, yes, I'm not the only one who's using the court… the other parts of the court, at least. I'm just occupying this one corner right here, on the far right edge near to the padded wall.

"That's so sick! Here, lemme try! Flying Magic Smash!"

What the hell kind of name is that? Not even the people back in my time name their techniques that silly! The loud dumbass who just 'executed' his 'Flying Magic Smash' can be heard all the way over here, and he and his buddies are in the middle of the court. I don't know about you, but that's a pretty loud voice. Annoying, in other words.

To my surprise, however, the sound of a tennis ball being hit resounds throughout the court, indicating an almost perfect execution of a smash. But unfortunately for me, I have to cut the surprise short in order act for the incoming ball that is shooting my way.

See, the ball hits my side of the court pretty fast; it is a pretty good smash. Under any normal circumstances, especially for someone who doesn't regularly play tennis, getting hit straight on by a well executed smash will prove to be fatal. Fortunately though, I'm quite familiar with tennis and still retain a little bit of my edge to respond to it.

Spinning around in what seems to be a split of a second, at least to the normal human eye, my racket is already in mid swing. All it takes is a swift, but firm, flick of my forearm to hit the incoming round projectile back to the other side of the court. Now, normally, a straight shot like that will be a fault; it doesn't bounce off the other side after all, but I'm not reacting to score.

The ball shoots back towards where it comes from in a near straight line. Thankfully, the ball travels too fast to hit the kid who smashed it here earlier. If he has been standing at his original spot just a second too early, he would've been a victim to a tennis ball to the face at a very, very fast speed.

"Whoa!" Several gasps and different expression of surprise can be heard coming from the guy's friends and the guy himself. Their reaction is justifiable.

The ball itself is… well, it's no longer the round tennis ball we are all familiar with. It's popped, as in, it's no longer a perfect round shaped. And if one is familiar with tennis, one should know that these balls are meant to withstand being smashed around. So, seeing that it's broken upon impact will definitely garner a little bit of shock.

And, yeah, it shocks even me too.

What the hell? Since when I can do that? I thought I…?

Raising my right arm, I test my grip around the racket's handle. Strange. I don't feel different. Giving my arm a few test swings, I still feel no difference. My eyes draw back to where the now broken ball landed, staring at it causing me to fail to notice the troupe of boys coming towards my way.

"Yo, duuuuuude! That was a savage shot Uzumaki-san!"

"Totally! Shoot! That was… that was so crazy the ball popped!"

"Hell, it's scary! Hayato, you saw that?!"

Yeah, random character who won't ever be named because he's too insignificant to this story… it was scary.

"Y-Yeah, I did." Looks like this one is a little bit more perceptive than the rest.

Looks like I've left several people speechless, even myself. This is unexpected. I thought I lost it all those years ago… I… how? How is this possible? I didn't even exert that much strength into that swing. Unlike my awareness and reaction, which has more or less no reaction to chakra most of the time, my strength has always been something that is reinforced by chakra.

I want to punch a mountain to smithereens? Gotta use Sage chakra for that.

I want to punch a bastard fifty meters away from me with a long, energy arm? Gotta need Kurama's chakra in order to make that possible.

Which is why people like Lee and Gai-sensei were such… wonders and rarity during my time. Their disability to tap into their chakra as easily as normal shinobi did, forced them to come with an alternative; brute strength. They had their physical prowess and strength enhanced to a ridiculous level that when it came to a one on one fight, they would win most of the time.

After having my powers sucked away from me, my physical abilities don't even come close to the feats I could do back then. No more jumping from tree to trees, no more surviving falls from cliff edges and no more stopping a charging demon rhino with both of my arms.

In a sense, I'm grounded with normal human limitations.

Looking back at the aftermath of the ball, I clench my right fist just hard enough to produce cracking sounds.

What the hell is up with me?

* * *

I guess it might sound cheesy or even straight up cliche, but eating ramen alone in the cold feels really nice.

What? Only me? Okay then, to each their own. But, yes, I am currently eating instant ramen in school grounds, something that I can't believe no one does more often.

The steam escapes the paper lid, causing it to hit my face. I shiver when the hot steam makes contact with my face, due to the already overcoming sense of coldness from the air around me providing such a difference in temperature. Snapping a pair of chopsticks into two with the aid of my lip and my other hand, I do not hesitate to dig into my meal.

Ahh… nothing tastes better than artificial flavorings that probably has enough chemicals in it to increase cancer growth from overeating. Whew, thank god cell death is impossible for me.

This is one of the little things I think people should enjoy more in their life, although it doesn't have to be eating instant ramen like what I'm doing right now. But, I'm foolish to think that peace isn't without it constant disruptions.

Because one of those constant moments is currently happening to me, right now.

"Whoa! He's eating instant ramen in school!"

Is this what that guy who got caught eating beans in the cinema felt when he got called out?

Lifting my head, I turn to see an approaching figure. Her pink hair remains vibrant as ever, as it is always the first thing I notice when it comes to her. But, still, what is she doing here? This is the side of the school, right near the courtyard. Not many students hang around here for some reason, so seeing Yui here is a bit of a surprise.

"And what's wrong with eating ramen at school, huh? You got any problem with that?"

She playfully hits my right bicep, occupying the space next to me. "I was just joking around, Maki. But, yeah, not many people eat instant ramen at school, you know. Usually we bring our own lunch, or by one from the cafeteria."

I roll my eyes. Typical reason. "Well, this is the more economical approach to eating. I didn't have to waste money buying ingredient to make myself a bento, and I don't have to waste more on the slop they serve during lunch."

Okay, that might have been a little too much. Japanese schools actually have pretty good menu when it comes to their cafeteria food. Healthy too.

Yui laughs for some reason. "Whoa, you sounded like Yukinon there for a second." She then adopts a stoic look, at least what a stoic expression would look like when Yui's the one doing it. " _'Please refrain from eating unhealthy food, it will ruin your health…'_ or something like that!" Her voice takes on a 'Yukinoshita-like' turn before quickly switching back to Yui's enthusiastic own.

I have to admit, it's quite amusing seeing Yukinoshita represented by someone who's essentially the exact opposite of hers.

And I'm not only talking about behaviors either.

I'm talking about someone who is _completely_ opposite of her.

Comparing _'mountains'_ and… uh… _'speed bumps'_ here.

"So, what're you doing here?" I ask with strands of instant noodle hanging out of my mouth.

"I made a bet with Yukinon about something and the loser has to buy a drink for the both of us." She explains, her eyes flickering back and forth as she recalls the experience. "It was, like, unexpected you see! I never thought that Yukinon was a competitive girl!"

From hearing that comment, I allow myself a chuckle. "I'll have to agree with you on that one." I slurp down more noodle and soup down my gullet. "The first time I met her, I didn't think she's the type to get competitive either."

"Oh, then how did you know?"

"Oh nothing." I shrug. "Hiratsuka-sensei just mediated a bet between the two of us. Now I'm stuck living my life having to spend most of my after school hours inside a lonely club room with a certain Ice Queen."

Again, I feel Yui's small fist hitting my bicep. "Ow, what's that for, huh?" I ask, shooting her an accusing glare.

"You shouldn't be so mean to Yukinon, you know?"

I stared at her.

"Okay, maybe Yukinon herself _can be_ mean to you at times, but that doesn't mean that you should go and call her names, Maki." That is still not a solid argument on whether or not I should be mean to her, Yui. "Yukinon is… she's not a bad person." She finally says after several seconds of struggling to find the right words.

But before she can say anything even more, I stop her. "I agree." She looks at me, surprised. "Yukinoshita ain't a bad person. Hell, I consider her to be one of the tamest girls I've ever met."

But she still ranked high in my 'Things Uzumaki Naruto Find Scary' list, though. That list won't change.

"I'm just… well, I don't hate her, that's for sure. I'm just… worried, I guess?" Is that even right? Am I worried about her? "I… knew someone who was much like Yukinoshita, in a way. The difference between him and her was that; he'd been through something that no other child his age should ever go through."

I take a deep breath.

"On one night alone… he lost all of his family due to some freak accident." I can hear the brief hitch of Yui's breathing. "He was only a kid when it happened and the incident traumatized him. Badly. As a result, it turned him into this unbearable asshole with a twelve foot pole shoved so far up his arse. That's not the worst thing that happened to him. He grew up with people seein' him as this... sort of freak-child, for being the only survivor of that freak incident, for something he couldn't control. And it did him bad."

I fail to notice the fact I've been gripping my chopsticks too hard.

"So he grew up an asshole, always shutting people off and acting like they weren't worth his time. But you know what, Yui? I can't blame him. After going through what he did, people were the last thing on his mind. All he wanted was answers. Answers that could, hopefully, shed some light on what happened that night. But… unfortunately, the answer he's looking for wasn't the one he wanted to hear."

I turned my head to look at Yui. She looked so… withdrawn, but that's just the side effect of me telling her this story.

"So…" She started. "What happened in the end?"

"He… began to… take on, uh, stuffs."

"Stuffs? You mean… drugs?" Her voice is barely a whisper.

...heh.

I chuckled mirthlessly. "In a way, yeah. He was so fucked up. Hellbent on whatever shit he injected himself with. It came to a point where he became an entirely different person… and I… I… couldn't bear seeing him like that. You see, he… he was like brother to me. And I loved him. Sure, he's an asshole 24/7, 365… but I can't blame him for being like that after the kind of _hell_ he went through. Even after knowing the answer, he continued that kind of destructive lifestyle. Hurting people left and right, causing pain not only to himself but others… every time I saw or heard the news of him doing these things… it made me miserable. It's like I've failed… or something."

"B-But it's not your fault, you're not respon-"

"It _was_ my fault… some parts of it anyway." I sighed, struggling to make my voice sound as neutral as possible. "If only I had tried harder to understand him, if only I had done more for him… there are countless of 'ifs' scenarios that I could've done that might've been able to save him… but I couldn't. There was nothing I could do."

I have but all set my food aside, bowing my head low to the point where my forehead is nearly touching my knees.

"And… Yukinoshita… although I can't say that I know what she's gone through, every time I look at her… it just… it just sort of… it just sort of reminded me of him, in a way." I chuckled.

I have no doubts that Yukinoshita is a strong girl. But Sasuke was a strong guy too, and he still managed to fall into his dark and destructive path. Who's to say Yukinoshita can't? Sighing, I lift my head up.

"Now look at me… talking to myself and it's not even about me!" I laugh, trying to diffuse the air of uneasiness. "Sorry for boring you like that, Yui, bet you don't wanna hear about th-"

A pair of feminine arms wrap themselves around my neck, stealing my body heat. Yet, at the same time, I can also feel some of their heat source warming me up.

" _Don't… ever say that."_ It's nothing more than a hiccup. I can feel her chin resting on my right shoulder, the scent of her apple-cinnamon shampoo enveloping my entire olfactory senses and driving them crazy. The action is so sudden that I fail to notice her broken voice and the warm tears flowing out of her eyes like waterfall.

"Don't ever say that." She all but hisses at me. "Don't ever say that people don't want to hear what you have to say." The hold around my neck tightens, I have no other choice but to bury my face into her hair. "If people don't want to hear you, Maki, then I will. I want to."

"Maki, you… you're my friend. You're my first, _real_ friend I ever have when high school started. A-And you said it yourself, too, saying that I'm your friend." I-I don't understand, what is she saying? "And you know what friends do, don't you Maki?" What?

She loosens the embrace, lifting her chin off my shoulders so that I can get a clearer look on her tear stained face. My heart skips a beat when I see the sight. It's not due to any whimsical reasons, but it reminded me of a sight long forgotten… at least I thought is forgotten.

"They listen to each other." Is apparently the correct answer to her question. "No matter how depressing or a-awful the story is, friends will always listen to each other. They have to." I see her hold her breath, before taking in an intake of air to replenish herself. "When you said that you're boring me… you're wrong."

This is the first time I have ever seen her so… determined.

"You're never boring to me, Maki. Maybe you were during the first time I met you, b-but it isn't! You're a fun person to hang around with, even if you can be a bit mean sometimes, but I like it when you're… you. It's like… having a close friend who's always there to remind me that what I did was wrong. Almost like a… childhood friend or big brother or something."

The more she speaks, the clearer her embarrassment becomes. But I have the feeling that it is not only embarrassment she's feeling.

"You see, Maki… I like you."

She says, as she stares at me right into my eyes.

"I know I'm annoying, I'm loud and I'm the kind of person who'll always get dragged up with what my friends are doing… but you never see me like I'm sort of nuisance. O-Okay, sure, maybe you find me annoying… but you're not like those people who'll leave me behind after promising to hang out with me sometimes! You keep your words and I… I appreciate it, I guess."

Once again, she takes a deep breath of air.

"What I'm trying to say is that, you're not the type of person who'll… fail your friends. And although I don't know who this friend of yours is, I'm sure that he understands - knows - that you tried your best to help him." Yui closes her mouth, before opening them again to ask, "he is… still alive, isn't he?"

"...no." I sigh out, finally calming down after the surprise embrace from Yui. "No, he's… dead."

They all are.

"O-Oh." A whimper escape her lips. "I'm sorry."

I can't say anything. I don't want to say anything. But I know I have to. How can I not, after listening to the words that Yui have to say about me? I just put this girl through an unnecessary baggage like that. Hell, why did I even start talking about it anyway? I've been through life this long without even mentioning my past to other people, but now of all times?

High school girls are scary. In this century, at least. Damn.

"But enough of that, Yui." I quickly say, before the both of us descend further in this carousel of awkwardness and bad topics. "Why don't you go get Yukinoshita that drink you owe her? Girl's probably suffering from loneliness in her Fortress of Solitude or something."

"Okay." The worry doesn't really leave her eyes, but I can tell that she doesn't want our conversation to sink deeper into even more depressing territories.

She dusts off her skirt as she stands up, carelessly giving me a quick and free view of her inner thigh. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. Can this girl get even more defenseless than this? I swear, at this rate, it won't be long 'till I have to walk her home everyday after school or something.

"'Kay then… I'll see you later, Maki." She waves her pretty little hand at me, her smile the perfect cherry on top of the proverbial sundae.

Now that I think about it… with her pink hair and whatnot, she might as well be.

"Damn… now I want myself some strawberry sundaes…"

And I'm not even into sweet food.

* * *

"Another day, another yen…"

I remember the good ol' days. Well, 'good' is stretching it, but that's just what nostalgia does to you when you begin reminiscing things from a long time ago. I've done my fair share of that, and most times, they weren't good at all. But for whatever reason, I keep on referring to them as 'the good ol' days'.

Again, nostalgia. Probably.

I can't believe I accidentally spill the contents of my emotional baggage to Yui. Girl was kind enough to spare me the questions - looks like she's far more sensitive than what I give her credit for - and hasn't done anything different.

But I notice things. Things like the way her eyes would often linger for a tiny bit longer at me whenever she sees or me… or just how, all the more, talkative she's been getting. Of course, I can guess, no, I am sure, that this is all because she's worried about me. A sweet notion, but she really shouldn't be worrying.

Exiting the elevator, I step out of it and adjust my collar. Today's one of those days. Days when I have to get all dressed up for the client in order to be able to suck up every single drop of money she has.

Despite being aware of how expensive my own services are, I still have to do it as it encourages competition with my co-workers and this thriving industry altogether.

Different agencies have different S.O.P. Or play styles, as I like to call them. But they're all similar in hindsight. Be polite, entertain your client, don't ask too many questions and look good enough for the client to throw more money your way.

And most importantly; act professional.

Meaning: no crushing on your clients.

Of course… there's really nothing I can do if that happened other than the usual rejecting and deflecting.

Tonight's not unlike any other nights. Client's someone with position and money and they want to use those two to get the full service, at least that's the vibe I'm getting the moment a limo picked me up from the designated location. Aside from that though, nothing too different… yet.

The receptionist was kind enough to give me the keycard to the room where my client is waiting. I guess whoever they are really wanted to set the mood well; surprises and all. But really, if anyone, I'm the one who's gonna get surprised.

We don't get to choose our clients in this line of work. Hosts, or let's say escorts like me, aren't given too much details about who we're gonna spend the rest of the evening off with. Customer confidentiality and all that. But I'm a bit of a special case. Tanaka-san looks out for me; as in, she finds me proper clients, not just some random college girl lookin' to hook up.

Besides, with my price, it'll be a bit suspicious if a random of the mill college girl from Tokyo University is able to afford my services.

Taking in a deep breath, I mentally prepare myself. Standing in front of the hotel room door, I give it three soft knocks before sliding the key card and entering.

Just a step in, the hotel room's efficient heater is already doing its job of warming me up. But seeing as this is one of the most expensive rooms in this hotel, it's to be expected. Stepping out of my shoes, I gently placed them on the rack, next to a pair of white wedges.

Hm… curious.

Without anymore delay, I make my way from the door and deeper into the room. But to my surprise, no one's waiting for me here.

The same can't be said for the balcony, though.

"Excuse me, but yo…"

The words die at the tip of my tongue.

"Yes…?!"

Judging from the widening of… her eyes, and the startled squeak, I'm guessing she's as surprised as I am.

Let it be known that for today, specifically, Tanaka-san didn't tell me the slightest bit of hint about the client I'm supposed. I chalked it up as nothing, of course… but oh how wrong of me to do that. It's very wrong.

 _Very_ , _very_ wrong.

The skin is pale, but not pale enough to be under the weather. Even from here, and only under the illumination of the moon light, I can tell that a lot of care and attention was put into them. The nape shows the slightest hint of red, indication of rubbing. My eyes then find themselves drawn into the windows of the soul, no longer bothering to pay attention to what type of clothing this person is currently wearing.

Eyes so dimly blue, you might just start mistaking them for silver, stare back at me unblinkingly.

At this point, nothing in the world mattered. I just… have questions. Nevermind the fact that this person is obviously my client, the fact that she's alone in the room is enough proof for me.

I just… I just… how?

How?

In the midst of my silence, I realize that I'm not the only one who is surprised. The person standing in front of me on the balcony, no longer separated by a sliding glass door, is just as surprised as I am. Maybe even more. The both of us are so drawn into each other's presence, so shocked that they are sharing their presence in the same room, in the very same hotel, at the very same part of town and in the same city…

I joked about how I'm gonna be surprised today, and shit, that joke turns out to be real.

"N-Naruto…?"

I gulp.

"Saika?"

* * *

"So…" Hot air escapes my nostrils. "Who told you?"

Totsuka Saika is my classmate from school. He is a boy around my - supposed - age and also happen to be the captain of the tennis club. Like several other students from our school, he's rather well known. Can't say I know him that well, but we've held conversations before. Honestly speaking, the kid's a good kid. From what I've heard, he's a kind person; hard working too. I would love to be able to confirm it myself by meeting him or talking to him...

...but not like this. Not. Like. **This.**

His head snaps up, looking at me with fearful and nearly tearful eyes. My heart clenches, as if it's been trapped in a vice iron grip. "N-N-No one! I swear, no one!" His voice is already faltering, and it sounds too fearful to my liking.

Sighing, I let my shoulders slump. The distance between us, if you can call sitting at the opposite side of the bed a distance in the first place, separates us; giving both him and me the much needed space we deserve.

"Saika, look, Saika." I say with the calmest voice I can muster. I can see his shoulders shivering, exposed to the elements due to the… low cut dress he is wearing. My hands tighten to fists, for some reason. "I'm not mad. I am not angry. I'm just… I'm just as surprised as you are."

He lifts his head up again to look at me, now with tears escaping his tear ducts. "Y-You are?"

God damn it… seeing him like this, hearing him like this… this is messed up. I swallow a noticeable lump in my throat, carefully trying to articulate my next words.

"Yes." I say, reassuringly. "So. If you don't mind me askin'... why're you… why are you…" This is harder than I think. "Uh… err…"

Noticing my discomfort, Saika spares me from asking.

"My… mother, she… she always wanted a daughter." He just barely manages to let the words out of his mouth; like the whisper of a ghost. He is hugging his legs close, shielding his face off the world. "S-So… Sometimes… things like this… happen."

I… uh… I'm not sure how I'm gonna tackles this, honestly.

"B-Before I was born, mom and dad were looking forward to having a daughter. T-They had everything prepared. Girls' clothes, toys, the room even… and everything, pretty much." He'd occasionally hiccup when speaking. "B-But as it turns out, the hospital my parents went to get my mom checked made a mistake."

I wince at the choice of word he used there.

"T-The doctor who was conducting the diagnostic sonography he… told my mom that I was a girl, in the womb. But when she gave birth…"

He doesn't say anything more than that, leaving the statement to hang. Licking my dry lips, I shift my position so that I can get a clearer look at him. Again, Totsuka Saika is one of the most well known students in our school. He's pretty popular, being the captain of the tennis club tends to give you that pass.

And, obviously, it also has something to do with this looks.

I suppose it's alright to assume that Saika has… been mistaken for a girl for quite a while now. I can't say how he feels about that specifically, but I'll say that I won't blame them folks for mistaking him as one. Saika is just that… feminine. He's _beautiful_ , and not in the general sense. He has the looks that could make other girls his age jealous.

I'll admit, I almost made the same mistake. If it weren't for his Adam's apple… I would've done the same thing as the other folks.

Now seeing him like… this… all dressed up as a girl, with makeups done to make him all the more girly… let's just say that if I was a lesser man and didn't know better, I would've done something I'd regret; job be damned.

"I… um…" A long sigh escapes me. "I honestly don't know what to say, Saika." In all my long life, I never had something to relate to Saika's situation.

"It's… fine."

His lackluster reply make me bite my lower lip. "But… I can say for sure that you won't be anyone different regardless of how you see yourself. I know that your parents were unfair in how they've been viewing you, but you know what Saika? None of their opinions matter in the end."

He lifts up his head, eyes burning into me as they make me the sole target of their attention.

"It was pretty, no offense, dumb for your parents to start assumin' like they did. And the quack who handled your mom's pregnancy deserved to get his medical license revoked for makin' a mistake like that. But, Saika, if you ain't comfortable with how they treat you… you gotta let them know you ain't. Otherwise, they're gonna keep on treating you like this for… for god knows how long."

A chorus of mirthless chuckling escapes my classmate's lips.

"I did try. I tried to tell them that I don't like wearing dresses, wearing makeups or having to care for unimportant things like my nails and such… but my parents, my mom specifically, would get upset and I… I don't want to make them sad."

"Then what do you think will happen if you let this continue, huh?" I ask him, my voice inquiring. "What'll happen if you let them continue to treat you like this? What'll happen in a year? Two years? Three? Five? Ten? Inaction won't do anyone good, Saika."

I observe his shoulders slumping further downwards upon hearing my scrutiny. "You see, Saika, the thing about parents - based on my observations - is that they always want what's best for their kids. Now there's nothing wrong with that. But most of the times, they don't actually _know_ what's best for their kids."

I remember a man who wanted his son to be seen as hero, for bearing a burden he would not dare impose on another man's child.

"They tend to… make the mistake of guessing, taking a shot in the dark, of what's best for their kids. I'm sure that your parents are lovely folks and want the best for you, despite how they treat you… but you, yourself, need to know what's best for you. What's good for you. If you're uncomfortable with how they're treating you, you gotta tell'em."

"But I-"

"Even if it means making them upset." I cut him off before he finishes his sentence. "Sometimes, you gotta make the message clear, regardless of how the other party feels. And if they are parents, in the context that they do truly care for you, they'll understand." He looks a little bit calmer after hearing that.

His fingers are curled, balled up into a fist. The slightest hint of shivering indicates that he's still having a hard time agreeing with my suggestion. No. He _agrees_ with me, it's just that he doesn't know what to do about this whole… mess.

God damn it… some parents, man.

It's a good thing I'm not one. I don't trust myself to be a good dad.

"So… what's the whole deal with you contacting my…" I hesitate. "...agency, anyway?"

This time, Saika looks away from me. More from embarrassment, rather than his unwillingness to talk.

"My mom… she finally decided that it's time for me to… um… 'hook up' with someone."

"Christ…" I hiss through my teeth, while my fingers are busy massaging the bridge of my nose. I glance at him through my fingers. "Really? Through an escort service? Your mother knows the kind'a people she was callin', right?"

My classmate's nod is slow and shameful, almost as if he's the one who called the agency himself. "Y-Yeah…"

"And she," Oh lord, I need to set myself down, "she didn't think that whoever you'd end up with would find out about your… your… _you know what?_ " This is the most exasperated I've been today, and no one can blame me for being annoyed.

Again, the same slow and shameful nod. "S-She _did_ know… it's just that, um," he swallows a lump of air, "she told me that… when the mood's already set… w-we… we wouldn't know the difference…" His face is basically a tomato at this point. Or whatever other red colored fruits or vegetables there are.

Holy…

"God… Saika…" I am honestly at lost. I don't know what to say. "I'm sorry, honestly, I… geez."

"It's… fine. It's not your fault, anyway."

God… this is the most awkward I've ever felt in my _entire_ life.

"So… what do you want to do now?" I ask, before realizing the implications of asking a question. "We can cancel this whole thing and pretend that this… any of this never happened." I tell him quickly.

"I'm sure that the people back in the company will understand if we explain every-"

"I don't mind!"

…

…

…

WHAT?!

"I-I said… I don't mind! I-It'll be a waste since m-my parents already paid for everything, I mean!" He's shuffling on his seat, eyes refusing to meet mine. "E-Everything's already been settled! The payment for the hotel, the limo… I-I even had to be in this…"

He proceeds to gesture at the dress he's wearing.

"...yeah." I can hear him gulp, accompanied by the sound of our respective heartbeats echoing the quiet room.

Let… let me be the first to tell you that I have no problems with people who are attracted to the same sex or gender. I am a firm believer that if you truly love someone, regardless of whether he's a he or she's a she, then you have the rights to love them.

Personally speaking, me myself, I am already in a spot where genders matters not to me, romantically speaking.

Okay, maybe not romantically. There's a very minor chance that I'll ever pursue a romantic relationship in the first place, but even if I do want to start pursuing… I'll have a very strong bias for girls, because I am more inclined to be attracted to their feminine features.

And in this line of job… we don't care about our clients' gender. As long as we get paid doing what we do.

And, yes, in case you're wondering…

...this wouldn't be the first time I'm in the same room with a male client.

My lips are as dry as the Saharan Desert. My brain is _thiiiis_ close from short-wiring. And there's this mysterious sensation bubbling in the pit of my stomach.

"S-Saika," I am finally able to speak, "are you sure about this?"

A slow nod is all about he can give me.

...fuck.

"Okay then." I relent. "So… how do you want to spend the rest of the evening?" I try asking, thinking that it'll buy him time to rethink his decision.

"I… want to…" Incoherent mumbling.

"What?"

"I-I said, I want to…" Again, mumbling.

Oh geez… I hope none of us regret anything by tomorrow.

Carefully, I capture his chin in my hand, tilting his head up slightly so that our eyes meet. The moment my eyes meet him, I see things like hesitation, uncertainty and fear. But, to my surprise and minor irritation, there is also a spark of stubbornness that I never know he has. His skin is flushed all the way to his ears and down to his neck. Geez, the kind of hell I'll find myself in for sinking my teeth into this boy…

"Before we… start," I gulp, "may I ask why?"

"It's because…" I feel the slight movement his jaw makes when he moves his mouth to speak, "...I've… always been watching you." He opens his mouth to explain again. "I've always-"

"Shh…" My thumb crawls up to his lower lip, causing him to simultaneously flinch and shiver himself to a state of silence. "...it's enough. That's good enough of a reason."

If I were to hear more, I'll just feel even more miserable about doing this.

"Just close your eyes and let me lead."

In a trance-like state, Saika subconsciously obeys my words, entrusting me with his very being. His eyes are glazed, lost in mine. Two brief claps are all it takes to shut off the lights in the room. Though it's dark, not everything is hidden due to the moonlight outside. His skin is as flushed as cooked lobster, and it's as soft as I have initially thought it is.

Leaning forward, I capture his lips.

...strawberries, who would've thought?

* * *

 **Haha, surprise gay.**

 **No R-rated scenes, sadly. I already feel guilty enough for introducing Saika like this… but it is necessary for the plans I have in store.**

 **And, uh, sorry for the long absence, I guess.**


	4. Chapter 4

_He never had a lot of friends._

 _It was not something he would outright admit, but it was the truth about him._

 _It had always been that way ever since he could remember. The earliest he could was sometime during kindergarten, not a memory he liked to recall._

' _Sai-chan, you're so pretty! Your mommy and daddy must love you very much!'_

 _A little girl from his class had said to him, her eyes glimmering in awe. He remembered the way how she, and some of her friends, gushed over how beautiful he was and he could recall the uncomfortable feeling that washed over him._

' _Hey all of you line up! Today we're going to play soccer.'_

 _The other boys cheered, no doubt excited to play after three non-stop lecture periods. The grade school he was attending had a prominent soccer team, so being able to participate and play got him excited too._

' _Toji, Aida! You two will be team captains, go and pick your teammates!' The coach instructed to the two boys who immediately went to do as they were instructed._

 _The other boys were beginning to get picked and among the crowds, he could feel his heart thumping, unable to hold back due to the excitement of being picked by either of the captains._

' _Okay, next one… I choooose, eh… Sunohara!'_

' _Yosh!'_

 _He knew the boy. He's Sunohara-kun who sits at the very back row on the left most side; infamous for sleeping in class. He chuckled at seeing the other boy's enthusiastic reaction of being picked, especially by Toji, one of their school's most notorious athlete._

' _Grr… damn you Toji, I was gonna pick him!'_

' _Haha, tough luck nerd!'_

 _As the teammate selection continued, he could see that they were thinning out; meaning almost everyone had been called. It was just him and two other guys._

' _Next is… Jiro, c'mere!'_

 _A boy standing next to him jogged up to his team. The tension that he has been feeling up to this point has increased two folds and he swore that his heartbeat is audible at hearing range._

' _All that's left is, uh…"_

 _Then, everything steadily went downhill._

 _He could feel everyone's stare on him - even the other unchosen boy standing next to him. He thought he had gotten used to it by now, but that was not the case. Toji and Aida were giving each others uneasy look, but eventually, Toji breaks the silence._

' _Sakamato, c'mere.'_

 _Sakamato, who had been standing beside him all this time, released a breath of relief before scurrying to join his team. Aida's team noticeably became uneasy, if he was to judge from the frowns and scowls now present on their faces._

' _...fine.'Aida's glare which was directed at Toji did not go unnoticed by him. 'Totsuka, you're with us.'_

 _Being called did not give him any semblance of happiness at all like he thought it would, instead, he felt awful. He walked to his team, eyes cast downwards with his shoulders feeling the heaviest they'd ever been._

' _Gah, it's the girly kid.'_

' _What can he do?'_

' _He should've joined the girls at gymnastics or something…'_

 _He felt like crying at that very moment, but he knew that would not help him._

 _It was useless… he didn't even get to play in the end._

 _Final year of middle school was… not how he expected it to end, to say the least._

 _The air was chilly, despite it being spring, and his coat was doing a less than stellar job in shielding him. Then again, he couldn't deny the sweat running down his back for being the primary factor in the sudden drop of his body temperature._

 _Why was he sweating? Well, he was nervous._

 _Standing in the presence of your crush tend to do that to everybody._

 _Her name was Reiuji Sae. She was a year younger than him and was the most beautiful girl he had ever get to know. Not only that, she was kind, smart and energetic. Due to these traits, she was considered to be one of the most popular girls in school. Last he heard, even his fellow third years used to ask her out but got shot down._

 _And here he was doing the same thing, but hopefully, he would get a different and much better conclusion than the others._

 _She, like some girls he knew, was about the same height as him; probably even taller. This, however, had nothing to do with anything, really. He was aware that he was somewhat of a late bloomer, this meant pretty much everyone else he knew his age was either the same height as him or taller than him._

 _He would be lying if he wasn't insecure about his height at some point of his life, but this time, he felt like it would actually matter. After all, his female classmates - pretty much his primary source of the female knowledge - always stressed about how girls like tall guys._

 _But he knew he shouldn't be discouraged. There was nothing wrong with being short, after all._

' _R-Reiuji-san!' He almost bit his own tongue. Oh how bad it would've been if his voice cracked or something._

 _Be a man! Was the mantra he kept repeating inside his head. C'mon, Saika, if you're a man, then you can do this! He kept repeating to himself._

' _I like you, please go out with me!'_

 _Before he asked her to meet him up on the roof after the ceremony, he already knew two things: one, he was graduating. Meaning that they wouldn't be able to see each other often due to him being a high school student. And two, her relentless streak of rejecting any advances laid upon her by the boys was known to be consistent._

 _These two factors alone should be a clear message for him; yet he refused to not try and confess to her anyway._

 _Reiuji Sae, however, was a kind person indeed. She knew about the senior standing before her and what the rest of the school thought of him. She had to admit that she too shared some of their views on him._

 _Him being more beautiful than most girls from their school? That checked out. Certainly._

 _But that was the problem he failed to realize._

" _I'm sorry senpai… but I can't date someone who's even more beautiful than me, now could I?"_

 _She said it with hesitation, indicating a sense of discomfort. Meaning that she had dwelled on the matter previously. And it shattered Totsuka Saika's heart like glass thrown to a wall after a drunken dinner party._

 _After giving him her answer, she quietly excused herself and exited the roof, leaving him all alone there to himself._

 _That day, as the cheers of his fellow graduates resounded through the air from the courtyard, celebrating their graduation, Totsuka Saika cried the hardest he had ever been._

* * *

"...so… that's about it."

Wow.

Honestly, _wow_.

I've heard countless of something people would classify as 'heartfelt confessions'. I've heard them from multiple people from multiple walks of life, so it's not wrong for me to say that I have at least a shred of understanding on what Saika was going through at the moment.

His unique circumstances aside, he's pretty much dealing with it the same way those countless other people did theirs.

They had to go through these things and having no one who could really and genuinely understand them. Although I had taken multiple roles, both as a comforter and a voice of reason, for their plight… I can say that I always try my best to view things from their perspective.

We are still at the hotel, but whatever carnal atmosphere that had descended earlier was now gone due to Saika.

Before I could… 'continue' my advances on him, Saika told me to stop.

Stop.

Thank… fucking… Christ.

My heart sank in relief when I heard the word came out of the boy's mouth. I was off of him in a split second, dropping my working behavior in an instant. Then, he started crying. I made no effort on comforting him… at least not in the way that would require me to touch him, considering what had nearly happened moments prior.

Saika then started telling me about his childhood up until his third year of middle school. It was… enlightening, to say the least. It made things clearer for me.

With the way people treated him and the way his own parents dealt with him… it's no wonder he's the way he was now, not that I think less of him to begin with… or after the revelation.

Now, a bed apart, we were sitting on opposite ends with our backs facing each other. To my relief, Saika didn't cry at all, otherwise it would've dragged the mood down even more. He was a strong kid.

"Wow. Saika, I honestly…" I know what to say, I said it before after all. Saika shouldn't let his life be dictated by how others chose to view him as. But would saying that again rid him of his dilemma?

No.

So, I gotta approach this differently.

"Saika?"

"Hm?" He responded, the hollowness of his voice did not go unnoticed by me.

"Let's get out of here."

Man, it's a relief to know that he brought his school uniform with him. Not his usual tracksuit and track pants combo, but Soubu's legitimate male uniform. With the tie and blazer even.

I'll admit, this was a fresh sight for me.

So we ditched the hotel, something I'm sure even Saika was glad for. We both needed the fresh air and staying in that room would only restrict us to doing… whatever it was we were supposed to be doing in there!

As for me, I'm still in my work clothes. Meaning, yes, I still looked like someone about to go picking up chicks from the street and pressure them into working for a shady company that may or may not have something to do with adult entertainment.

Ignoring the looks people would throw at me every now and then, I take a glance at my walking companion who was walking on my right side. He brought his bag with him, which I'm sure he was using to store his earlier attire.

And judging from his expression alone, I can tell that he was still feeling down and uncomfortable.

I gotta do something…

"Hey." He perked up at my call, craning his neck upwards to meet my gaze. "Wanna get something from the konbini?" I gestured to said establishment just across the street we're on.

Saika's uncertainty was in plain view, there's no need for me to pull a Sherlock Holmes style psychoanalyzing on him. "...sure."

So, we made our way there.

"Welcome."

The clerk manning the register greeted our presence in his practiced and equally subdued tone. We ignored him, something I'm sure he appreciated, and went to shop.

Let's see… what do we have… oh, here it is.

Smiling, I get the only one thing I want to buy from this Lawson. Waiting for Saika, he returned to me with empty hands, however.

"What's wrong?" I asked, frowning a little. "Not buying anything?"

"Ah… I didn't bring my wallet with me…" He reasoned, meek and all.

"It's fine, I'll pay for it." Heck, technically, I'd be using his money since the payment that his parents had wired to the agency had just been partially wired back to me; my part of the share for the evening.

"It's fine." My frown deepened after hearing his reply. "I'm not hungry or thirsty or anything."

You know, when you said it like that, it's not very convincing… but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt here.

"Okay then." I made my way to the register and made my purchase. Now with my treat in hand, I invited Saika outside the store. I gestured to the empty spot that was normally used to park bicycles, motioning for him to follow me. "Let's sit here."

"Sure?" Though it was filled with doubt, he followed my gesture nonetheless.

We sat on the curb, which was slightly cleaner than the asphalt. I pulled out my purchase and ripped the plastic wrapper open, revealing the treat inside. With a minimal amount of strength, I snapped it in two.

 **Crack.**

"Here." I offered Saika one half of the ice lolly I bought. "Take it."

Wordlessly, he took it from me. He stared at it for a few moments, before eventually tasting it. I saw him shiver, wince, and shifted expressions multiple time. Seeing it all played out in front of him, I couldn't help but laugh.

"W-What's with this ice lolly?!" Saika coughed rubbing his tongue with a towel he had on him. "It's so salty! It's like tasting sea water!"

My laughter had yet to stop. When it finally did, I answered him. "Oh… Oh god… they always do that." Haaah… "It's because it kind'a is." I revealed, my voice taking on a more casual tone now that we're both off the mood that had been plaguing us earlier.

Saika began treating the ice lolly like it was some sort of disease. I was afraid he was going to throw it into the trash can.

"Look. Just lick it slowly, don't try and swallow it all in one go."

"Like this?"

"Yeah, like that. Be careful, don't get some on your uniform, it'll be a pain to get rid off."

"Mmmkay…"

Looks like he had finally adjusted himself to the flavor. The ice blue lolly was true to its namesake. Being called a sea salt flavored treat, it also went with the flavor along with it.

"There, it's good innit?" I asked, a mirthful smile on my face.

"It's… not as bad as the first taste." Saika mumbled, now used to his ice lolly. "But, I don't think anyone would bother trying to enjoy these after their first taste… do you like salty things, Naruto?"

I chuckled briefly, indulging myself in the sea salt flavored treat. "Life is too bland… a wee bit of salt won't hurt anyone."

Saika could only give me a blank stare, before erupting in a fit of chuckles not unlike myself just moments ago. "What was that? That's so cheesy."

"Ah, most cheeses are salty too. I like them."

"Ahahaha!"

Seeing him laughing made me smile. It ought to be an odd sight. Two high school boys eating ice lollies in front of a Lawson at midnight.

Sounds like the start of a bad slash fic to me. Wouldn't read that even if you pay me to.

"Naruto?" Glancing sideways, I was greeted by the sight of a smiling Totsuka Saika.

"Hm?"

"Thank you for cheering me up."

I stuck a tongue out, rolling my eye sideways. "Aww, found out already? Gosh darn it, better try harder next time." My silver haired classmate only chuckled even more at hearing my reply.

"No, but seriously… thank you." He said, now holding a piece of wooden stick from the ice lolly he finished earlier. "If it were anyone else tonight… I…"

The way his body shivered underneath the implication of his statement was enough to give me an idea of what he meant.

"I'm not sure if I would be able to laugh like this anymore." He continued in a much lower voice. "I'm just glad that it was you I met."

Me too. If it was anyone else… I shudder to think what would happen to Saika in that hotel room. I wasn't able to hold back the urge to shiver.

"And also… your advice." I raised an eyebrow. "The advice you gave me… about approaching my parents and try to talk things out… I-I'm scared." His voice broke from all the pressure that I thought had left him earlier. "I'm not sure if I can walk up to them and do what you said I should do… but I'll try. I'll try my best."

Smiling, I reached out to place a palm on top of his head. "Good." My hands moved to form a circular motion, rubbing the crown of his head as gently as I could.

"...r-right." Although it might just be my eyes playing tricks on me, his cheeks turned red for some reason.

Lifting my hand back up, I dusted myself off the ground, Saika following with the same gesture. He was about to walk over to the nearest trash can and throw his ice lolly stick, but I managed to stop him from doing that.

"Wait, don't throw it away!"

"Hm?" He looked at me, confused.

"Check the stick, see if you win a prize or something." I urged him.

Saika brought his stick underneath the entrance's lamp. He then smiled. The captain and ace of the tennis club turned towards me and gave me his brightest and most charming smile yet. The kind of smile that completely demolished my earlier impression of his mood.

"Looks like we're getting one more!"

Sadly, it was only one more.

* * *

Sleep was for the weak!

...was what I tell myself from time to time, but right now? I'm the one who's weak.

Yui was giving me worried looks the moment I flopped my way into homeroom with my uniform frazzled and bags under my eyes. Hiratsuka-sensei wasn't helping either. Why? Because now, I have an essay on why proper resting and sleep schedule is an important part of Japanese society.

I swear, that woman…

"Maki… you promised me that you'll get better rest."

Oh… now don't give me that tone, darlin'… "Just let me… sleep'n never wake… up…"

"B-But we're having Chemistry after this! Daimon-sensei is very strict!" She tried to argue with me. How dare this girl argue with me, who was trying his best to steal every wink of sleep that was denied to him by his employer?

Long story short, the agency found out that nothing happened between me and Saika last night… or was it this morning? While nothing bad came out of it as a result, I had to report things in full details to the people back at the agency just in case Saika's parents decide to file a complaint or something like that.

I didn't really do my job last night, technically speaking.

Speaking of which…

"Hey, where's Saika?" I asked Yui.

The girl blinked. Giving me that look with her mouth agape. Then, she reeled back as if I'd just unleashed some sort of scent to ward off airheaded people or something.

"Eeeeeeh?! Maki, you know Sai-chan?!" God damn it girl, don't shout!

"Yui, lower your voice." I groaned out in a pathetic manner. "Too loud…"

"O-Oh sorry…" she quickly apologized. "But… I didn't know you know Sai-chan, Maki."

"Silver haired boy from our class who also happened to be the tennis club's captain?" I lifted myself from my desk, and despite them being bloodshot and heavy and all, I shot Yui a disapproving look with my eyes. "Am I joke to you?"

"W-Well, you can't blame me! I never see you two talk, like, ever!" Well, that's fair. Saika and I never really talked to each other in class… now that I think about it, we don't talk that often outside of class either.

"Just because we don't talk to each other doesn't mean I don't know who he is, Yui." But alas, I'm not so keen on losing this verbal battle.

"Grr…!"

I've been playing this game far longer than you, little girl!

Now sporting a full blown pout, Yui rapped her knuckles on my forehead before blowing raspberries at me. She calmed down soon after, her eyes glancing at our absent classmate's desk.

"But, yeah… Sai-chan's not here, maybe he's sick?" Although it came out rhetorically, I can't help but think about it.

Was Saika okay? He must be… he assured me that he was, after all, right before we parted ways. Did he reach home safely? If I recalled, he had a driver with him. So he must've had. Maybe… it had something to do with his parents?

"Maki, are you okay?"

Yui's voice caught my attention, bringing me out of my inner thoughts. "Sorry, what was that?"

"It's just… you had this serious look on your face just now." The tell-tale signs of worry began surfacing on her face, reminding me of the promise that I won't worry her that much anymore.

"Sorry… just some thoughts." I reassured her, albeit poorly, before turning quiet once again. "Hey, Yui?" I asked.

"Hm?" She perked up.

"Are you close with Saika?" I asked, trying my best to make it sound like I'm not too nosy or inquiring.

She shrugged her small shoulders, puckering her lips while scratching her scalp with a finger. "Muuu… I guess? We hung out often along with some others from our class… Hayato-kun's group sometimes invited him to hang out."

So they're not _that_ close, huh? Meaning she might not know about Saika's… circumstances.

"Why're you asking?" She asked back, shooting me a curious gaze.

"If he's gonna be a no-show for today, someone's oughta be assigned to give him the coursework he's gonna be missing." I reasoned.

"Well, duh," don't roll your eyes on me like that, "but that's a job for the class rep, usually. Why are you asking though… hm… suspicious…"

See? This was the problem with airheads. Sometimes they look like they're about to float from all the air trapped inside their cranium, next thing you knew, they're as sharp as a clean razor!

Biting my lower lip, I raised a finger. "Yui, c'mere."

"Huh?" I wiggled my pointer in a 'closer' gesture, prompting her to lean forward towards me, her defenseless face in full view. Then… I unleash a swift strike to her exposed forehead in the form of a flick.

"Ow!" She recoiled from the suddenness of the flick, earning several looks from our nosy classmates. "Whaddaya do that for?!" With her loud voice, she demanded reason for the flick. She looked like she was a hair's breadth away from crying, her lips pouting while both of her palms are covering her forehead; probably thinking that it was the only spot that I could attack.

Sure, I can explain… but why would I? So, I'll just say,

"Nothing."

"Grr… Maki!"

"Yuigahama, stop flirting and get back to your seat!"

After getting scolded by the teacher, she retreated to her desk. Aaaand she wouldn't talk to me until much later.

* * *

"Can you believe it Yukinon?! He just flicked me on the forehead! Like this!" To prove her point, she flicked _herself_ on the forehead. Yelping, not expecting that it would still hurt even if it was of her own doing. "I-I got scolded by Daimon-sensei because of that too!"

"Is that so?" Our sympathetic, and I use that term lightly, club president nodded along to what our resident airhead had been saying. Whether or not she was truly listening in the first place was up for debate, however.

But, as usual with typical Yukinoshita behavior, she found it complementary to give me a scornful look at any transgressions - be it alleged or not - that had to do with me.

"It seems that you're bolder than I give you credit for, Uzumaki-kun." She would start of in a neutral tone, but the biting underline was there. "Should I be worried about having my forehead, or any part of my body for that matter, violated by your touch?"

"I'd bend you over my lap and spank your whatever-fabric-your-panties-are covered ass until your butt cheeks are redder than the circle on the Japanese flag."

"..."

"..."

They should know better to not disturb my power nap. Rubbing my eyes awake, I was greeted by the sight of two speechless female high schoolers with their mouths hang open like that Pikachu meme that's been floating around the internet.

Yui's lips twitched, unable to properly compose itself. "S-See?! He can be so mean!" I decide that it would be the best course of action to ignore the heated looks both girls are sending me.

"I regret not having my phone on record. That statement alone is more than enough reason for me to file a charge against you, Uzumaki-kun." Although the statement may be threatening, it carried no weight to me or whatsoever.

"Oh yeah, and what are you gonna tell the judge? _My cwassmate tweatened to spank my pwetty widdle bwuttom 'till it's red becuz I've bween a vewy bad gwirl_? Hah! On second thought, _please_ press charges against me, I'd love- no, I'd _kill_ to hear you say that. Hell, I'll even plea guilty."

The widening of Yukinoshita's eyes were enough satisfaction for me to have my very own mental celebration. But, it also proved one more thing. Yukinoshita Yukino was the type of girl who always got what she wanted. And I'm not talking about being spoiled or anything, although that might just be true.

I suppose someone with the reputation of being a hard-ass like her came with the benefit of people being less cordial when socializing with her, giving her the position of someone who could pretty much do anything to them without fearing any relationship backlash; even if there was one at all.

A stickler to the rules and a firm believer in being a self-made person… of course people would cut their bullshit when faced with a type-A personality like that.

I guess I'm the literal wind of change that rattled up her post.

"Oh don't you give me that look." Rolling my eyes, I too gave Yui a look of her own. "It's only a joke. I'm not ready for something like a court hearing." Though I _may_ have had experience with them in the past, but these two did not have to know that.

Rather than blow up in explosive anger, Yukinoshita settled for a piercing glare. If I was a lesser man, I would had been affected. But, I wasn't. Shrugging my shoulders, I ignored it. It's good to see that Yui at least had a sense of humor, though.

"Even if Yukinon did that, you'll still get arrested Maki." With her cheeks puffed and still flushed, our school's most famous airhead told me.

Again, I shrugged my shoulders. "Don't care."

"You're insufferable." Finally decided to speak, eh, Princess?

"Puh-lease, I'm tolerable." Wait a minute… "At best." There we go.

Her glare did not let up. Oh well, she's the one who's gonna get wrinkles if she kept on glaring like that anyway. Woo-hoo for immortality, for once. I literally wouldn't age a day!

This scenery around me, of us lounging around inside this normally empty classroom turned clubroom, had become some sort of common occurrence. A sense of normalcy and air of stagnation that would make Shikamaru happy and eventually asleep. Truthfully, I do not mind.

For all the hesitation and reluctance I gave for joining Yukinoshita's club at first, I do not mind this at all. And it certainly _not_ because of the fact that we had yet to have any client ever since Yu-

 **KNOCK KNOCK**

"Come in."

-i… oh forget it.

Straightening my sitting posture, I joined the girls in looking towards the door. There are only two reasons why you would want to enter the Service Club clubroom. One was if you're Hiratsuka-sensei, but that woman - as Yukinoshita had mentioned in the past - was ignorant to the concept of privacy, manners… as well as personal space and violence towards a (supposedly) minor among other things.

Yeah, our lovable sensei was a wayward soul. And don't get me started on some of her habits. If the Ministry of Education found out about them, she wouldn't be a teacher anymore.

So, that meant whoever's about to enter was not Hiratsuka-sensei.

"Eh, is this the Service Club?"

Wait, that voice…

"Sai-chan!" My thoughts were completed by Yui's vocal calling of our guest's name. My surprise was reflected by Yui's own, only Yukinoshita was the one clueless about our surprise.

Entering our club room, but not before closing the door behind him, Saika walked towards our table dressed in his jersey and shorts combo; a look that most of us were more familiar with. Yui did not hesitate in any shape or form. The moment the tennis club's captain took three steps into the room, she went and dragged him by the hands.

"Totsuka Saika-kun…?"

"Ah, he wasn't present earlier today. We assumed he was sick." I quickly supplied Yukinoshita with the need-to-knows.

"Is that so?" That is so, princess. "Does Hiratsuka-sensei know?"

This time, Saika himself answered the question. "She does. My parents drove me here personally, they also gave me a letter to give the faculty explaining the reason why I was late."

He sounded okay. No depressing undertones or anything that would make anyone assume he'd been through something big. I mean, he could just be hiding it, couldn't say for sure.

While this particular train of thought crossed my mind, his eyes met mine. The corner of the silver haired tennis captain's lips stretched upwards, forming a natural smile that fit perfectly on his face. By natural I mean it was the kind of smile that looked nothing short of charming.

"Ne, ne, Sai-chan."

"Hm?"

"Are you here for a request?" Not unlike a puppy, Yui beamed with visible expectation. Just picture a wagging tail and a set of dachshund ears and you'd get what I was picturing.

"Yes, actually." At that, both Yukinoshita and I reacted in our own respective form of surprise. Although it seemed we both opted to raise our left eyebrow by a few centimeters.

Saika, sent a polite smile to Yukinoshita's way before settling it all entirely on me for a brief second. If anyone had seen it, which I was hoping anyone hadn't, it might looked like he wanted me to say something. I kept my mouth shut, and I tried to make it look as natural as I could. Although I trust Saika to keep client and server confidentiality, it would still send suspicious connotations both Yui's and Yukinoshita's way should the both of us acted as something more than acquaintances.

Like what happened with Yui earlier in class. Thankfully, it was only Yui. I'm not sure I could pull off a solid enough reason to dupe Yukinoshita, at least not without her suspecting me.

Now one might think I'm reading too much into this, but trust me, I'm not. If even a hint of something suspicious got out and Yukinoshita decided to play Sherlock, I'd be in boiling water and Saika too by extension.

But, still, a request. Just what is it, I wonder…

Thankfully, Saika was there to clarify.

"The tennis club has been doing rather poorly as of late." All three of us could sense the dip in Saika's mood just from the opening sentence. "And as the captain of the tennis team, I want to remedy that." He looked at us with shimmering eyes; just enough to prove that he's serious to do whatever it was that needed doing.

As always, Yukinoshita's reply was typical. "Why us? Although we are not saying we're going to reject your request, I'm sure the tennis club's advisor would be more than to fulfill the role, no?"

Saika looked sheepish. "The thing is, the tennis club doesn't have a permanent club advisor. Because although we are a sports team, we aren't as distinguished as the soccer team or the swimming team. Our club advisor role is usually filled in by teachers who have free time on their hands and are willing to watch over us during practice."

Well that would explain it. No club advisor meant that whoever's the one picked as team captain, Saika over here, would be forced to be in charge of the things that club advisors do. Things like setting up a schedule, team counseling, advising and etc.

Hmm… strange, our club advisor didn't seem to be doing at least half of the roles I mentioned.

But anyway, Saika's plight was clear. Between being a good team captain and an advisor, he was clearly struggling playing both roles.

"O-Oh but, I'm not asking you to stand in as our club advisor or anything!" He stammered, thinking that we might had been assuming the wrong thing. "I only ask that you guys help me improve my techniques in playing, that's all!"

"Uuuh… that's great and all but…" Yui was scratching her forehead. "Aren't you, like, crazy good at tennis already, Sai-chan?"

Flushing a little bit under the unexpected praise, Saika looked away. "I-I'm just normal, really." He shook his head, brushing off the embarrassment. "The reason why I'm asking for help is because I believe that if my members see me train hard, it'll help inspire them even more."

...oho, ain't he cheerful?

"Very well." Yukinoshita seemed satisfied with his reasoning, seeing as it was a pretty good one to begin with. She smiled, crossing her arms above her thighs. "We will help you improve your technique… along with several other things that I have in mind."

Oof. I'm sensing something brewing inside Yukinoshita's head, did she have a sadistic streak that I wasn't aware of, or something? Nah, she always had it from the start, I was just too distracted by her bitchiness to notice.

Still though… Yui brought up a good point.

From word of mouth alone, I knew Saika's quite a tennis ace. See, Soubu's a very proud school. Which meant it always made a physical proof of its students' achievements. Most commonly in the form of trophies, awards and all that… if not the students appreciation assembly that we'd attend annually. And it ain't hard to remember. Last year, I remembered Saika's name being called. But I reckoned he wasn't a captain yet back then.

At the front entrance hall, just after the lockers, was a large and glass cabinet containing these so called physical proofs. If I recalled correctly, the tennis club had a few under its belt. And judging by the fact that Saika would only do tennis related exercise during free time at P.E, it's a head scratcher seeing him coming to us for help on something he's clearly good at.

"I don't know about these two, but you're not gonna find a lot of help in me, Saika." Being subjected to their questioning gazes, I continued to elaborate. "Was never a tennis player, that's all."

I admitted with a roll of my left shoulder.

"I've watched several matches, but couldn't be bothered to play." I shrugged, noticing that they're finally letting up their looks.

"Do not worry, Totsuka-kun." Oh here we go. "Where that blonde brute fails, I'll pick up the slack and help."

I did not miss the look of pure smug that this devil superwoman sent my way.

She continued, saying, "Unlike him, and Yuigahama-san," we did not miss the loud 'hey!' from Yui, "I have practiced tennis and still do from time to time."

Somehow, Yukinoshita's assurance did not make the smile on Saika's face any less strained.

"Don't worry Sai-chan, even if I and Maki aren't gonna be that much help, we'll still try our best and make sure that you'll play better!"

Actually, I kind of lied, Yui.

While it's true I couldn't help him much when it came to playing the sport itself, I could still give him advice on things like aerobics and physical workout in general. But since Yukinoshita said she had something extra of herself to offer, I figured I'd let her take the stage first.

"But wait a moment." I held up a hand, grabbing everyone's attention. Turning my body towards Yui, I gave her a pointed look. "What are _you_ even doing here in the first place, Yui?"

"Eh? I'm here to eat lunch!" She looked genuinely confused at first, but that soon transformed to indignation. "Why, am I not allowed to spend time here, Maki?"

"No." I shook my head, while simultaneously crossing my arm. "It's just that what do you mean by 'we', huh?"

"Huh?" Was the intelligent reply I received.

"What do you mean by 'we'? You're not even a member of this club, you don't have a say in this." I said while trying to hide a growing smirk.

"Eeeeh?!" She then looked at Yukinoshita for confirmation. "Is that true?! I'm not a part of this club!?"

A little bit shaken by the sheer volume of Yui's voice, Yukinoshita nodded. "Uzumaki-kun is right. You are not a member of this club, Yuigahama-san. In fact, the fact that you're here to spend time for lunch so casually in the first place was surprising to me." She said. "I wasn't as surprised previously because you'd always come in here with Uzumaki-kun, but today you came here first and alone."

"Besides," I interjected, "she never received any request letter or moderator approval from Hiratsuka-sensei. So you aren't a member of this club, like, at all~"

"Muuu… then I'll write it! I'll write as many as you want!"

"Sorry, we don't have 'em no more."

"Gah! Maki you meanie!"

* * *

As far as training went, we spent the couple few days quite productively. Rather than gathering at the club room as per usual, we would meet up with Saika on the tennis court. Most of our time was spent on the court, but we also spent quite a few on the track field; when the track team wasn't using it anyway.

I must say, I'm impressed by Yukinoshita coaching. Despite her less than stellar stamina, she managed to give important insights and advices to our client. And Saika himself had proven just how much of a tennis ace he was; anyone seeing him perform the past few days would automatically assume that he's some sort of pro playing in the little league or something.

Yui and I, especially Yui, weren't much help. I admit it, it's from the lack of trying on my part. Saika's stamina and core strength were already good to a point where refining anything else would put unnecessary strain on the boy.

Yukinoshita, on the other hand, was a total slave driver to him. She made him go double the lap he would usually do, double the amount of time he would spend shadow training and all of that done without added resting period.

I was afraid that she might just push him too hard, but Saika proved resilient. Almost stubborn, in a way.

Today, our session was no different. We're about halfway our usual duration and for a change of pace, I decided to keep Saika company in his training.

"I'm… surprised… haah… that you can keep up, Naruto." My fellow male classmate remarked as he panted alongside me, keeping our pace equal.

The sweat covering his face made his skin shine under the evening sun, or maybe that's just me. Au contraire, however, I was barely sweating.

"It'll take much more to get me to sweat." Due to my past profession, even a training regimen for Hell Sergeant Yukinoshita was no sweat to me. Pun intended. But of course, I was not going to tell him that.

"You used to play sport too?"

I hesitated. "Kind of." Without glancing sideways, I could feel his stare lingering on me.

"Kind of?" He questioned, hinting curiosity.

"Was involved in my middle school's… uh… basketball team. Wasn't really a member, but I helped fill in some spots when it's needed."

"Is that so? That explains why your arms are so muscular. Your calves and thighs too."

While normally I would freak out when another guy indirectly confessed that he had been staring at me long enough to notice these stuffs, I knew Saika had no impure intentions or anything like that.

"Don't all athlete or people who do sport need those parts of the body to be swole?"

He chuckled at the word choice I used. "No, not really. It depends on the person, and what constitute as an athletic sport." He said. "By definition, an athlete is someone who is proficient in sports and other forms of physical exercise."

I snorted. "Then they should call me an athlete." I remarked, still keeping a steady enough pace to be jogging alongside Saika.

"Why's that?"

"Putting up with Yukinoshita's attitude should be considered an extreme sports." While saying this, I craned my neck sideways, stared the observing black haired club president right in the eye and stuck my tongue out at her. "I mean, she's literally got us running ain't she?"

Laughing, Saika seemed to appreciate my little gesture. While Yukinoshita didn't. Oh no she didn't. In fact, I could tell she wasn't pleased at all… if the ice cold glare she's giving me was any indication. But it's not something I'm unfamiliar with.

"How many laps left?" I asked my fellow male classmate.

"Just this one. You?"

"We'll be finishing together, then."

"Okay, we'll finish together."

Wait… did that sound weird, or was it just me? No? Just me? Huh, okay then.

We finished our lap with our respective degree of tiredness. From the panting and huffing he's doing, Saika looked spent. Spent, but not down for the count just yet. I felt my legs all warmed up and ready to go for more, provided if it's anything other than running; since it's getting boring to me.

Approaching us, Yui handed both me and Saika cold water bottles.

"Nice job there Sai-chan, Maki!" Like the ever excitable puppy she was, Yui was a little bit too loud on the greeting. "Here you go."

"Thanks."

"Thank you."

Although I'm not tired, I am a little bit parched. Taking a small swig from my bottle, the sensation of cold water rehydrating my gullet was as refreshing as it could get. I saw Saika downing the entire content of his bottle. As expected, he was sweating a lot after all.

"A remarkable improvement from previous records." Remarked our stand-in coach still dressed in her uniform. Out of all of us, Yukinoshita's the only one who was not wearing sports attire or at least her P.E uniform.

She walked over to us carrying a small wooden chart in her hands. She sneaked a glare at me when she thought I wasn't looking, but I was too attentive, catching her in the act.

"Okay, so, anything else on the list?" Saika asked, after he had finally settled down.

"Just one. A practice match." All three of us perked up. "Although you've been practicing with me for the past sessions, I'd like to mix it up and do a doubles match for today. If that is fine with you?"

"I have no problem…" Our tennis club captain muttered, while his finger scratched the back of his neck. "I think you should be asking Naruto and Yui that question."

Refusing to meet both mine and Yui's eyes, Yukinoshita made the decision. "I'm sure they're more than happy to help you, Totsuka-kun. We've gone this far, after all."

Both Yui and I cast each other looks, shrugging nonchalantly at the idea.

"I'll help, Yukinon! But you guys know that I don't play tennis that well…"

"Sure." I voiced my opinion. "Will it be a mixed doubles or what?"

Finally, her eyes met mine. "You'll be teaming up with Totsuka-kun." I'd be fine with that, but since this is Yukinoshita we're talking about, she had to add her few cents into it. "Although I'm the one who suggested the idea, I feel quite sorry for Totsuka-kun to be playing with a brute like you."

"Yeah, yeah." While Saika and Yui chuckled at my expense, I waved off the Ice Queen's barbed quipped about me. Honestly, they barely sting at this point, and it's not due to my thick skin. "Just change already, you don't want to be flashing anyone your panties by playing with your skirt on do you?"

The glare returned. "That goes without saying, you oaf."

So while Yukinoshita dragged her sweet little behind off to the changing room to change, Yui, Saika and I got the rackets ready. We borrowed them from the tennis club, obviously. Several minutes later, Yukinoshita returned to the court dressed in a Polo shirt and training shorts, she also ditched her loafers for a pair of white sneakers.

"Here." I handed her the racket, grinning. "May the best player wins."

Her eyes narrowed marginally, as she swiped the racket from my grip. "Indeed."

After deciding who'd serve first, both of pairs went off to our respective sides. Saika's serving, meaning I'm within volley range. He'll be serving to Yukinoshita's side of the court so I'm not counting an easy score just yet. I glanced back and gave my partner a nod, he nodding back to indicate readiness.

"Hey guys! What're you doing?"

We all flinched when he heard a familiar but completely unrelated voice approaching from the court entrance. I glanced over to Yukinoshita and I could already see whatever hint of determination she had died along with the light in her eyes.

Approaching us was a rather well known group, consisting of even more well known people. Although I had no problem with people seeing us practice, I got the idea that they're not here to just watch… if the two fake blondes of the group were hinting.

"Hello Yui." The chick with the fake blonde hair, her name's Miura if I recalled correctly, walked up the court over to Yui's side as if her ancestors were the ones who made the court themselves.

Surprisingly, Yui's greeting wasn't as enthusiastic as I thought it'd be. "Y-Yahallo, Yumiko… what are you guys doing here?"

"We saw that you're about to play, so why not come and join in." And just like that, Hayama Hayato made his group's intention clear. They're not here to watch, but to 'join in'.

While the rest of the groupies were on the sidelines being the busy chatterbox they were, the duo of fake blondes were still on the court intent on joining our match. I looked at Yukinoshita again and she had that look which showed discomfort and sizeable annoyance fixed on her face.

When you're always in the same room as her after school, engaging in banters, you'd pick up a thing or two about her expression. I'm no pro, but she gave me that look one too many times before.

Naturally, this meant she was ready to confront these two scrubs and give them a taste of what a frontal in-your-face ice cold lashing could do to a person. I was just about to intervene when someone beat me to the punch…

...although it wasn't the intervention I was expecting at all.

"We're practicing here."

The way his voice managed to sound indifferent, strict, yet soft at the same time was what got us flinching. Even Yukinoshita. Standing with his racket lowered, shoulders broad and legs slightly apart; we were all greeted by the sight of a stern-faced Totsuka Saika with his eyes boring holes towards the newcomers' head.

I double checked my club members' face to make sure I wasn't the only one whose eyes were going wide, and I was right to do that. So this sight was not only shocking to me, but apparently the newcomers as well. While I was well aware that all of them were in the same class as me, I didn't expect them to react to Saika's assertiveness the way they were because that would imply they'd know him well enough to react the way they did.

But, in a way, it made sense for them to react like this. Seeing a side of someone you thought you knew you'd never seen before could be very shocking. This was reflected on Yui, who was the closest to him out of all of us. After rendering all of us speechless, Saika directed his attention back to our coach of the day; who quickly snapped herself out of the stupor.

"Yukinoshita-san, let's continue."

"R-Right," stuttered the first ranking girl of this fine school. She briefly sent me a glance that I almost mistook as a call for help, but I was sure she was doing the same thing as what I'd been doing; checking to see if she was the only one surprised.

And it seemed that Saika's assertiveness had brought about a chain reaction; for Yukinoshita herself had now began to direct her utmost attention to the newcomers.

"Hayama-kun. Miura-san." The two, oddly enough, reacted way less when Yukinoshita addressed them specifically. "It would be appreciated if you do not interfere with club activities."

This was where her decisiveness came to play, as she shot down their attempts to speak before they could even open their mouth, "The tennis court has been properly requested to be used by and for the Service Club in conjunction with the tennis club. We have physical proof of this contract and we could have it enforced if it must come to that."

Her words were like a knife's edge. Sharp. It left no room for words nor quarrel, and backed up by an equally piercing glare, it rendered the opposing party even more speechless. Even though we were literally outside, not confined into a room or whatsoever, the tension was palpable. Unsurprisingly, it was Hayama Hayato who recovered first from the threat. Or was it a promise?

"N-Now, now, Yukino-chan-" you'd have to be blind to miss how Yukinoshita violently jerked when Hayama addressed her as so, "-we're all friends here, why don't we all share the court and play together?"

It's obvious from the way Hayama talked that these two had history, like, World War One and World War Two history. Between Yukinoshita and Saika, Yui's the only one who's unsure of what to do.

Me? I'm perfectly content watching until push comes to shove.

"U-Uh… guys…" I feel sorry for Yui, I truly do, but even she knew that words alone won't solve anything… at least without insults or shouting involved. "L-Let's calm down a bit, hehehe..."

Meanwhile, I observed the rest of us who weren't involved in speaking. Not including myself, I could see four people standing on the sidelines quietly with their eyes glued to the scene. Some of them, the guy with the flaxen hair and hairband, looked like he wanted to say something but when his eyes met mine, he paled and looked away, suddenly finding the benches interesting.

So I might've glared at him a little bit, what of it?

But, really, the star attraction was the unspoken debate going on between the two pairs. Mister School Superstar and his Prime Time Fangirl versus The Fullmetal Ice Queen and the unexpectedly aggressive Precious Prince. It's like a WWE tag team match, except neither were scantily clad in boxers or briefs and no fake punches were thrown at each other.

...not that I'd pay to see something like that, or anything.

"Please leave, you are disturbing my practice."

In the end, it was this moment during the stare-off that rattled both of the intruders' nerves. An angrier looking and even more glaring Totsuka Saika who had his racket propped on his shoulder with his nose slightly higher than the altitude it was used to.

Especially the girl, Miura. For some reason, she instantly looked away when Saika's eyes glazed over the both of them. Was there something between the both of them?

Either way, the victors of this subtle showdown were clear. We've dug our heels and we showed them we're not intent on sharing.

"Let's just go, Hayato." But the girl's surrender was the final nail in the coffin that was Hayama Hayato's persistence. I was expecting a little bit more sass from the girl, but the uneasy and troubled lingering stare from Hayama Hayato was all we got.

Wordlessly, the group began walking towards the exit; leaving no words in their trail. We could only stare quietly as their figures disappear from our sight. Now, the atmosphere was ten times worse than what it started as. Geez.

"Well, that went better than I expected." Breaking the so called ice, I could hear my classmates and club president release their bated breaths that they had been holding. Scratching the back of my neck, I turned towards Saika. "So… uh, anything you want to say about that, Saika?"

His expression did a one eighty of the one he showed earlier. It was back to the innocent and charming one that most of us were familiar with, with a tinge of sheepishness. He shuffled on his feet, head dipped down to hide the redness on his face. Looked like he was aware of just how different he was moments ago.

"I-I'm sorry… I've made things all awkward." No one said anything to deny his apology, considering what he said was true.

"But… that was unlike you, Sai-chan. I didn't know that you can be all strict and stuff! You're, like, twenty percent Yukinon!"

"Pft-OW! Why did you hit me woman?!"

"I apologize, it seemed my hand had slipped." said the completely guilty girl who's tending to the tennis racket she HIT ME WITH NOT TOO LONG AGO!

Obviously, she was pissed because Yui had used her for her standard of what a hard-assed person was like. She also didn't appreciate my sense of humor for finding it funny, which it was. Rubbing the sore spot where she had hit me at, I cast her a disapproving look before shrugging it off.

"It was a surprise, but a welcomed one." Yukinoshita remarked with approval in her eyes. Wait, did she even watch Star Wars?! "Although I have to agree with Yuigahama-san to a point, Totsuka-kun. From the little time we've spent, I've… never once thought you'd be able to deflect a person like that."

Sheesh. "What are you saying, Yukinoshita?" I faux sneered, taking the spot next to my fellow male. "Are you saying that our Saika here ain't manly enough?!"

One of her eyes rose marginally. "No, and I meant nothing rude by that statement I assure you." Then she glared at me again, crossing her arms while still holding her racket.

"L-Let's just get to practicing shall we, guys?" Yui's whine was akin to that of a pet dog who was stuck hearing its owner argue over which dog food brand was best to buy.

Sighing, Yukinoshita pinched the bridge of her nose; a rather constipated look on her face. "Very well. Let's start with a normal match, then we'll see if we can do something extra."

And the rest of the day pretty much went like that. During the game, however, I noticed several things. I remembered saying I wasn't particularly good at tennis, but my old life had pretty much done one heck of a good job of letting me keep up with Saika's pace. I mean, all you had to do was hit the ball to the other side and not miss the court.

But back to what I was going to say; I felt… different.

It's a bit hard to explain, but the closest I could come about it was like… like walking down a road you'd been through. The sense of familiarity, I supposed. I thought nothing of it during the match, choosing to pay all of my attention on the game, but now that we're done, I couldn't help but recall.

"Naruto?"

Startled, I mentally cursed myself for being so absent-minded. Yeah, that sounded strange even for me.

"What's up, Saika?" I greeted the freshly dressed tennis ace who had his towel slung over his neck. "Anything you want to run by me so that I can tell Yukinoshita later on?"

"No… it's just…"

With an eyebrow raised, I scanned his expression. Nervous… agitated? For what? Was what had happened before with those guys catching up to him or something? No… I don't know why, but that ain't it…

"I want to say thank you!" He suddenly blurted out, shocking me. And judging from the way his eyes went wide; the heat rushing up to his forehead, it's as shocking for him too.

Before he could embarrass himself sputtering and becoming a machine gun of words, I placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. At least, it's what I thought was comforting.

"Hey, no sweat alright?" Pun not intended. "Besides, you should say that to Yukinoshita. She's the one who came up with all of this, after all." I gestured with my hands wide apart, wiggling my eyebrows for effect.

"Oh… I mean, uh…" He's shuffling on the spot even more now. "I meant… I want to say thank you for… last… mumble mumble…"

"What?"

"For last time!" His voice came out louder than intended. Much to his chagrin. But fortunately, there's no one here but the both of us. "I-I want to say thank you for last time… you… know? W-When you gave me that advice?"

Momentarily, my mind recalled what exactly it was that he meant.

" _If you're uncomfortable with how they're treating you-_

"-you gotta tell'em. Right?" finished the tennis captain, completing the memory that I was trying to recall. Eyes widening, I could feel the corner of my lips stretching ever so slightly. Eventually, I was already grinning like a man who had just struck gold.

Chuckling, I transferred the hand I'd placed on his shoulder to the crown of his head, ruffling it lightly.

"Damn right."

* * *

Film students were often told to not use cafes as a place of setting, something about it being too limiting and overly done. I wouldn't argue on the latter part, but the first one's just a matter of some stuck up director's opinion… if you asked me. If the person writing the scene wanted it to be set on a cozy little cafe on the corner of 5th Avenue, why couldn't they?

There's gotta be a reason for that. So please, film teachers, don't be too harsh on your students.

My inner monologue segues to my current predicament. Here I was, by my lonesome, sipping a cold glass of salted caramel macchiato on the corner-most table of this fine establishment. This place was a bit of a special case, see. It's not very popular, and not a stab at the owners or something, but I preferred it like that. So, it's a nice place to unwind and - sometimes - fall asleep at.

Although, please don't do the latter, I don't want to be held accountable for anything inappropriate.

Anywho, just like with the scene in my monologue before, there's a reason as to why I was here. I'm waiting for someone. Was it work related? Yes. But, trust me, it's not in the way one might thought it to be.

 **[Where are you?]**

The question on my message page glared back at me, as if it's demanding I answer directly to the mic built into my smartphone. Sighing, I put down my drink to reply.

"I… am… here.. Where are… you? Sent."

Not even three seconds later, I got my reply.

 **[U'r inside? Soz', am outside. Going in now.]**

"...little brat, making me look bad…"

Before I could bring my glass up to drink, darkness settled in front of me. Normally, as someone who had spent a good portion of his life as a warrior who was used to people sneaking up on him with the intent to dislodge his head from his neck, a sudden loss of vision like this would have made me panicked and react violently to whoever managed to get the upper hand on me.

But I felt her presence when she 'snuck up' at me, I heard her giggling and I wasn't scared of some little girl covering my eyes with the intention of teasing me.

"Guess who~?"

While I may not be scared, I was quite annoyed.

"Please don't start. I had a long day today." I whined, letting her pull my head back, arching it in an uncomfortable position.

"You don't say. Sniff. Sniff." Oh so she's sniffing me now, ain't she? "Hmm… you smell like you ran a marathon around your school…"

"That ain't wrong." I snorted, still with her palms covering my eyes. Sighing, I finally made the effort to pry off her palms from my scalp, much to her enjoyment.

She squealed and giggled at every little bit of effort I put into prying her delicate little hands off my face, before eventually, relenting and letting me to a semi-upside down view of her face, grinning at me not unlike a mischievous little imp from hell.

"Good evening, Komachi."

Hikigaya Komachi, the only daughter to my handle Hikigaya Tanaka, a first year high school student at Kaihin High School, smirked like the little devil she was.

"Good evening to you too, _Na-ru-to-san._ "

Then, she leaned in and pulled a Spider-Man at me, much to the shock of the other patrons in the cafe, WHICH WAS SUPPOSED TO NOT BE CROWDED IN THE FIRST PLACE!

WHERE ALL OF THESE PEOPLE CAME FROM?!

* * *

 **Three things:**

 **Yes, I just did that.**

 **Yes, I know I've been gone for far too long.**

 **And, yes, my life is a mess and I am in the middle of trying - and failing - to fix it.**

 **See you all later, I won't be here all day.**


End file.
